


White Houses (That Year)

by fuckboydirection



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe- Christian Boarding School, Anal Sex, And a lot of kissing in between, Barebacking, Consensual Underage Sex, F/M, Lilo are stepbrothers, M/M, Multi, Nick is the Headmaster (figuratively and literally in Harry's case), Oral Sex, Polyamory, Public Sex, Recreational Drug Use, Underage Drinking, Vaginal Sex, and this is a very unholy Catholic school, cheating (kind of)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-08-05
Updated: 2016-04-05
Packaged: 2018-02-11 23:21:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 73,389
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2086974
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fuckboydirection/pseuds/fuckboydirection
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Zayn, Harry, and Niall have a ... <i>thing</i>. But it works for them except for when Zayn leaves to fool around with Perrie at the all girls school down the road and the times when Harry sneaks off to mess with Headmaster Grimshaw. It's rough sometimes but it's manageable. What seems to not be manageable however, is when stepbrothers Louis Tomlinson and Liam Payne arrive at their all boys Christian school and Zayn and Harry get even more distracted than they were before. Then things at Calvary Creek just slowly start to unravel out of control.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Once upon a time when I'd written Let Me Be Easy to Love, I'd mentioned that all of the boys had gone to high school together. This was long before Lightning in a Bottle where there would be hometown visits, parents to meet, and details I'd come to regret mentioning later like the writers of How I Met Your Mother with the "Robin line" at the end of the pilot. So to cover my ass, I said they'd all gone to boarding school in London together which gets brought up a lot in the latter story. Then while I was working on the wedding chapter for the aformentioned Lightning in a Bottle, Ziall had sex in church and the idea of badly behaved Catholic school boys emerged. The following story is what transpired from it.
> 
> (Title is from White Houses by Vanessa Carlton aka the ultimate OT5 song and That Year by Brandi Carlile because I listened to it on repeat while I wrote the first chapter and the story takes place over the course of one school year)

Harry shut the door to Headmaster Nick Grimshaw’s office closed behind him and smirked to himself as he walked down the hall back to biology. He didn’t cause too much of a distraction to anyone as he slipped back into the classroom and took his seat at the lab table beside Niall.

“What’d I miss?” Harry whispered, his eyes trained on Mrs. Heathrow’s bum as she wrote down the parts of a cell on the board.

“Not much,” Niall whispered back as he shifted and rested his hand on Harry’s thigh. Harry smiled at him and placed his hand on top of Niall’s.

“Where’s Zayn?” Harry asked, taking note of the empty seat in front of them.

Niall cleared his throat and licked his lips as he shifted around in his seat again. Harry looked at him quizzically before he leaned back to look under the table.

Well he’d found Zayn. He’d been sucking Niall off underneath the lab table during Mrs. Heathrow’s lecture. Harry slid his other hand under the table to give Zayn a high five while he laughed to himself as quietly as he could.

“How long’s it been?” Harry whispered to Niall.

“Not too long. It’s hard staying quiet though,” Niall shifted around again, “I think I might just have to put my head down and bite my arm.”

Harry chuckled to himself as Niall slumped over to rest his head ontop of his folded arms on the lab  table while Mrs. Heathrow continued on with her lecture, completely unaware of what was happening in the back of her classroom.

+++

“It’s been a long, long day,” Niall sighed as he threw himself down ontop of Harry later that night while Harry had been going through some things on his laptop.

“It really has,” Harry agreed and leaned down to press a kiss to Niall’s lips. Niall put his hand on Harry’s neck to bring him down for another and smiled up at him while he ruffled his curls.

“What’d you get in trouble for today?” Niall asked as he started to flip the zipper on Harry’s jeans up and down absentmindedly.

Harry thanked God that Niall wasn’t watching his face because he swallowed and flushed for a second before he could answer, “Uh, I wasn’t in trouble this time actually. Headmaster Grimshaw just wanted to congratulate me on my outstanding English grade.”

“You mean _Zayn’s_ outstanding English grade,” Niall corrected him.

“Whatever,” Harry rolled his eyes at him. If he had to pay Zayn in blowjobs to write his English papers, it was _their_ English grade damnit.

“Why does Grimshaw always give you special congratulations? My PE grade is ‘outstanding’ too,” Niall crossed his arms and pouted.

 Harry flushed again and bit the inside of his lip. There was clearly no way that he could tell Niall that it was because he was sleeping with their headmaster. No way. It wasn’t that he didn’t _want_ to tell Zayn and Niall-they were his best friends (with benefits)- he just _couldn’t_. He and Nick had gone over it every time they hooked up _why_ Harry couldn’t tell his friends. It annoyed the shit out of Harry but the sheer mix of fear and anger on Nick’s face every time he had to remind Harry why he couldn’t say anything were enough to keep him quiet.

“Envy is one of the seven deadly sins, babe,” Harry shrugged his shoulder as casually as he could and hoped Niall would leave it alone.

“So are lust, greed, and gluttony which you are totally guilty of,” Niall raised his brow and smirked in triumph.

“Oh yeah?” Harry snaked his hands underneath Niall’s shirt enticingly, tricking him into thinking that he was just going for a casual touch but snuck his hands up underneath Niall’s pits so that he could tickle him.

“Harry quit,” Niall gasped as Harry straddled his waist and continued to tickle him, “Harry stop! Fuck you, get off of me!”

“Hey hey, what’s going on in here?” Zayn asked as he opened the door and only caught the sight of Niall with his shirt half off and Harry on top of him.

Niall managed to throw Harry off of him at the distraction and put both of Harry’s hands in his lap before he sat on him so that Harry couldn’t tickle him anymore.

“Where’re you going?” Harry asked, taking note of Zayn’s dressed up attire when it was time for them to be going to bed.

“I’m just gonna pop over to Cross to see Pez for a second,” Zayn answered while he messed about with his hair in the mirror. Of course he was going over to Canterbury Cross, the all-girls school down the road, to see his little girlfriend or whatever the hell she was. When was he not nowadays?

Niall and Harry both shared an annoyed look before they looked back over to Zayn.

“Well when will you be back?” Niall asked.

Zayn licked his lips in annoyance and shrugged, “I don’t know.”

“Should we even bother waiting up for you?” Harry asked.

“Probably not,” Zayn sighed, “But I’m sure you two will be fine on your own.”

Niall let out an annoyed huff, “Well if you come back, you can sleep in your own room.” Zayn scrunched his brows together in confusion. “What don’t you understand about that?”

“What is you two’s problem?” Zayn asked frustradedly.

“There’s no problem,” Harry moved his hands from under Niall’s bum so that he could wrap them around his waist.

Zayn looked at them critically for another moment before he shook his head and walked back out of the door.

“God, can you believe him?” Niall frowned as he got off of Harry to sprawl out beside him on the bed.

“I don’t see why he even bothered to come in. He could’ve just texted us or summat,” Harry shook his head as he laid down and crawled into Niall’s arms.

“Not even just that but like- God. I don’t know. Does it bother you?” Niall asked as he unconsciously stroked back Harry’s hair.

“Does what bother me?” Harry asked.

“That he sees her. Like I get that this whole thing just happened out of convenience and that we’re not actually together but we might as well be,” Niall said to Harry, though his gaze was off in space, “Like are we not enough for him that he still feels like he has to go out and risk getting in trouble to see her all the time?”

“When’s the last time you talked to him?” Harry asked as he looked up at Niall’s grimace.

“What do you mean?” Niall looked back down at him, “I talked to him just now.”

“I mean _talked_ talked to him; about Perrie and how you feel and all of that,” Harry clarified, though he knew there was no point in asking because Niall probably hadn’t and didn’t plan to.

“Oh G- Harry,” Niall screwed up his face again proving Harry’s point.

“What?” Harry said, “I like that you like talking to me but it’d be more effective if you told him yourself. He always just tells me that I’m too emotional.”

“You are,” Niall pressed his thumb on Harry’s nose which made Harry smile up at him, “But I can’t.”

“You can,” Harry told him, “You just don’t want to.” Niall rolled his eyes and Harry rubbed his curls under Niall’s chin, “Just think about it, ok? You’d feel better if you talked to him.”

“No, talking to him would make me feel like an idiot. You know what would really make me feel better?” Niall drifted his hand up Harry’s toned thigh beneath the comforter and Harry smiled as he restraddled Niall’s waist and locked their lips in a kiss. They broke apart long enough for Harry to slip Niall’s shirt over his head before he took off his own and then they were back at it again, licking into each other’s mouths while their hands roamed all over each other’s bodies.

Harry circled his hand around Niall’s cock while Niall reached over to get some lube from the drawer beside Harry’s bed. He slicked up two fingers and Harry took him down to his knuckles almost immediately which made Niall laugh.

“Hey, don’t be mean,” Harry pushed his chest. His brows were slanted like he was mad but the half smile on his lips proved otherwise.

“Maybe we might need to give you a break,” Niall said as he slipped in a third finger and prodded at Harry’s prostate.

“Mm mm,” Harry shook his head in protest as he swallowed and bit his lip.

“Things are getting a bit loose down here,” Niall commented.

“Fuck you,” Harry’s eyes shot open as he frowned and his face flushed in embarrassment. He dropped Niall’s cock from his hand and crossed his arms to cover his chest.

“No, hey don’t be mad. I’m sorry,” Niall pulled him down so that he could kiss Harry’s mouth, though Harry’s kiss back to him was dead and reluctant. “I’m sorry. That was mean. Just feels like you’ve been stretched already and I know it wasn’t me. It could’ve been Zayn since he doesn’t really tell me much about what he does when I’m not around anymore,” Harry frowned and flushed again. It’d been from that afternoon in Nick’s office but Harry clearly couldn’t say that so he just chose not to answer instead, even if it meant throwing Zayn under the bus.

“I’m sorry, Harry,” Niall apologized again when Harry still hadn’t said anything, “I’ll give you a blow job if it’ll make you feel better.”

Harry shrugged as he laid down so that Niall could get on top of him.

Niall left a trail of kisses from Harry’s chest all the way down his stomach to his hips and his thighs before he stopped, noticing a fresh bite on Harry’s right hip.

“Who gave you this?” Niall asked quietly, pointing at the mark.

Harry frowned and bit his lip again. That was Nick’s doing too. Everything seemed to be Nick’s fault when he was having problems with Niall and Zayn. It should have been ok for Nick to leave marks on him since he wasn’t supposed to be having sex with anyone else (school rule) but he _was_ having sex with someone else, two someone elses, and apparently his tracks were getting sloppy.

“It wasn’t you?” Harry asked, though he already knew the answer was no.

“No. Did Zayn give this to you too?” Niall asked, a look of hurt flashing over his face.

Harry didn’t want to lie so he just bit his lip and didn’t answer again.

“How often have you guys been fooling around without me?” Niall asked.

“Niall it’s not like that,” Harry tried but Niall was already sitting back on his heels, clearly not in the mood anymore.

Niall shook his head and let out a breath, “It’s fine, ok. Whatever. Like I said, we’re not even together anyways. Fuck who you want, when you want. Don’t tell me, I don’t care.” He pushed off of Harry’s bed to start walking to his own on the other side of the room.

“Niall,” Harry frowned and tried to catch his hand but Niall had walked away too fast. “ _Niall_.”

“Goodnight Harry,” Niall turned off the light and then crawled into his own bed, leaving Harry alone in his.

“I know you’re not sleeping,” Harry said after he’d been rolling around in his bed, trying to get comfortable without being pressed up against his two usual bodies (or at least one). Even when Zayn went out to see Perrie at night, Niall and him almost always shared Harry’s bed anyways. They were at the point where they needed to be pressed together to fall asleep now so Harry knew there was no way Niall was sleeping but he didn’t answer him.

Harry rolled his eyes and adjusted the thermostat in the room to make it colder so that he’d at least have the excuse that it was cold when he walked over to Niall’s bed and crawled in beside him. He didn’t bother with trying to get under Niall’s arms or pulling Niall into his but he knew within one to two hours Niall would get cold and mold himself into Harry’s warmth.

+++

“Tried to freeze my balls off this morning?” Niall frowned at Harry as he shoveled a sausage into his mouth the next morning at breakfast.

Harry shrugged with a mischievous smile on his face, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Yes you bloody do. Don’t do it again,” Niall pointed his fork at Harry authoritatively, “If I leave to sleep in my own bed, don’t try to fucking kill me for it. And would you get off your damn phone,” Niall shot over at Zayn who was still half stoned from the night before and was most likely smiling at his phone because he was texting Perrie.

“You know for someone who got laid at least twice yesterday, you’re pretty fucking miserable,” Zayn complained as he slid his phone into his pocket and cut off a piece of his pancake.

“No, that was you. We didn’t have sex last night,” Niall informed him.

“What do you mean ‘that was me’?” Zayn asked as he pushed the pancake into his mouth.

“Well you blew me in bio. Then apparently you also fucked Harry by yourself which you know- great, whatever. Then you went to see Perrie and I know you two didn’t just sit around playing Scrabble all night because both of our beds were Zayn-free this morning so that means you were probably still there,” Niall explained.

“First of all, you _told_ me to sleep in my own bed when I got back. And second, I didn’t fuck Harry by myself yesterday,” Zayn frowned as he took another bite of his food.

Niall turned to look at Harry skeptically but Harry tried to sip the juice from his cup to block Niall’s face from his vision. It didn’t matter though, because Niall watched him until he’d finished it and had to put the cup back down and look at him. Harry set his jaw and met Niall’s disapproving stare with as hard as face as he could manage.

“You’re not very good at trying to look tough,” Niall said and finally looked away.

“Did you tell him we fucked alone yesterday?” Zayn asked Harry.

“No,” Harry bit the inside of his lip and couldn’t meet Zayn’s glaring eyes for more than a second at a time.

“Then why would you think that?” Zayn asked Niall.

“Because he was stretched and bitten up last night,” Niall told him, “Like he’d already fucked that day.”

“Well did you even ask him who he fucked or did you just decide to accuse me?” Zayn rolled his eyes.

“Well would it really be that far off for me to think that you’d fuck him by yourself without telling me?” Niall asked. Harry didn’t like that they were fighting (especially about the quality of his bum and in front of him at that) but he was glad that the attention was shifting off from himself.

“And what the hell does that mean?” Zayn shot back at him. He held Niall in the same threatening glare that Niall had given to Harry until Niall broke. “Answer me,” Zayn growled.

Niall rolled his eyes and shook his head before he started to stand up from the table, “I’m gonna go study or something.”

“You don’t study,” Zayn snarked.

“Well I am today,” Niall said before he walked away.

“Why is he being such a little shit,” Zayn complained as he watched Niall throw away his tray and walk out of the doors of the cafeteria, not even looking back to him and Harry once.

“He’s just upset,” Harry shrugged as he peeled his banana and took a bite even though he wasn’t really hungry anymore.

“About what though?” Zayn pressed.

“Are you really that thick?” Harry frowned, “I thought you were supposed to be the smart one between all of us.”

“What?” Zayn asked.

“He’s mad that you went to see Perrie last night, you twat,” Harry knocked him on his head.

“Why? I gave him a blow job yesterday, what more does he want from me?” Zayn asked.

“I don’t know,” Harry sighed, “Maybe if you two would actually talk to each other, you could figure it out.”

“I _did_ try to talk to him and you see how that went,” Zayn motioned to Niall’s empty seat.

“That wasn’t talking, Zayn,” Harry’s face softened as he leaned forward to rub his hand up and down Zayn’s arm, “Be nice to him. Come to bed tonight and talk to him. Cuddle with him. Don’t leave this time.”

“I was supposed to go see Perrie again tonight,” Zayn looked down at his tray and Harry took away his hand.

“Well blow her off,” Harry said, his tone leaving no room for Zayn to argue. Zayn opened his mouth to say something but Harry cut him off, “It all comes down to who the bigger priority is. Are we more important to you or is she?”

“Well you guys obviously,” Zayn frowned and looked back into Harry’s eyes.

“Your choice seems pretty clear to me then,” Harry shrugged and took another bite from his banana.

“But I still like her,” Zayn said. “Like I could see us properly together one day,” Zayn’s voice drifted off. Harry looked back up at him with a frown. “You guys are great too, you know that. And you know I’ll always care about you guys as friends, but you can’t honestly tell me you thought we’d be doing this forever.”

“Well no, but,” Harry cut himself off because he didn’t know what else to say.

“And it’s not like you haven’t already been stepping out on us too, clearly,” Zayn looked Harry up and down, “Because you know we didn’t fool around yesterday and it obviously wasn’t Niall.” Harry flushed. “Look, I just don’t want to hurt anyone, ok?” Zayn sighed, “I like what we have going here but maybe things might be getting a little too serious.”

“Are you breaking up with us?” Harry tried to make it sound like a joke but any form of rejection was still a hit to the ego.

“Niall said we weren’t even together,” Zayn shrugged.

“Well I hope you plan on telling him all of this yourself. I’m not breaking up with him for you,” Harry put his foot (and banana) down.

“I hope things aren’t going to be awkward,” Zayn frowned. Harry shrugged and looked down at his plate.

“Are you mad at me too?” Zayn asked him.

“Well I wasn’t before, but I kind of am now, to be honest. But you know, whatever. If she’s what you want then have at it. Like you both said, we were never a real thing anyways. What we want doesn’t matter,” Harry fiddled around with his yogurt to try and distract himself.

“I didn’t say that,” Zayn reached over to touch Harry’s elbow gently and Harry looked back up at him to search his face, “I’m not doing this because I don’t want you guys anymore. I still want you, both of you, all of you. But it’s not fair to you or him. I know I’ve been coming to bed less and less and it’s clearly starting to cause problems so I just think it’d be better to end it now before things start to go bad.”

Harry looked down, “Well I’m gonna miss you. Not too much, but I’ll miss you.”

Zayn did a little half smile, “I’ll still be around all the time.”

“It just won’t be the same,” Harry filled in the blank for him.

“Harry, I promise it’s better this way,” Zayn stroked his thumb in little circles on Harry’s arm while Harry watched him, “You two will be fine without me. You’ll take care of each other. Hell, you two could even have a proper monogamous relationship now.”

Harry rolled his eyes, “I doubt Niall wants that and if he did, I doubt it’d be with me.”

“Oh, Harry, don’t say that,” Zayn told him, “You’re great. You’re so nice to him and you’re kind and caring and warm. You’re amazing. There’s no reason Niall wouldn’t want you.”

Harry shrugged. He wasn’t in the mood to have to spell it out for Zayn that if Niall had to choose one of them to be in a relationship with, it would be Zayn in a heartbeat every time. Niall had never said it out loud but he didn’t have to. When Zayn was away, Niall noticed. His entire mood shifted until Zayn was back with them. When Harry wasn’t around, Niall was completely fine. Hell, it meant he got Zayn all to himself for a bit. When Zayn had marks on him from Perrie, Niall always flipped or made his own excessive collection to cancel hers out and remind Zayn who he belonged to. When Harry had marks from Nick, Niall usually just ignored them; assuming they were ones he’d made himself and forgotten about or that they were from Zayn.

“Let’s just go to Global Studies, yeah?” Harry suggested as he stood up and grabbed his tray to throw away in the bin.

+++

They walked in to Mr. Cohen’s room to find Niall sat on the couch in the back corner with his head propped up on one of his hands while he scrolled though his phone aimlessly.

“I’ll talk to him,” Zayn muttered as they started to walk towards the back.

Harry held onto his elbow to pause him for a moment, “Don’t do it now. Do it later when he doesn’t have to be in class for the rest of the day.”

“I meant I would talk to him,” Zayn furrowed his brows, “Like friends? Because we’re still friends?”

“Oh ok,” Harry nodded and let go of his elbow, “Go on then.” Harry walked to save their usual spot of desks in the back and occasionally looked over to watch while Niall and Zayn talked. Niall was a bit hesitant at first but after a few minutes his legs were over Zayn’s thighs while he threw his head back, his boisterous laugh filling the room.

“Ok?” Harry asked with a hopeful grin when they walked over, hand in hand, to take their desks after the bell had rung.

They smiled at each other and then at Harry. “Good,” Harry smiled back at them and turned around to face the front of the room while the rest of their classmates started to fill in the empty seats of the room.

When the second bell had rung, Mr. Cohen finally shuffled into the room with two kids Harry had never seen before following him.

“Uh, ok you little buggers, we’ve got two new pieces of fresh meat. Try not to tear them up all at once,” Mr. Cohen announced. The two boys shared a nervous look before they looked at the class.

“I’m only kidding,” Mr. Cohen said, “But this is a rough bunch so be wary.”

“Hey!” Harry called from the back and the class laughed. The shorter of the two boys at the front laughed as well and it made Harry’s stomach do a little flutter. He had a beautiful smile and the way his eyes crinkled when he grinned made Harry’s breath catch in his throat.

“Well introduce yourselves,” Mr. Cohen made a shooing motion with his hand.

“Well uh, I’m Louis,” the shorter boy said and slung his arm around the other boy’s shoulders, “And this is my big little brother, Liam. He’s shy.” He patted Liam’s stomach and smiled at him encouragingly. Harry had to rest his chin in his hand while he watched them, the fond already pouring out of him and he’d only just learned their names.

Zayn kicked him under the desk, “You’re drooling.” Harry flipped him off without even bothering to look away from Louis.

“Hi,” Liam muttered and waved.

“There’s a free seat in the back by those mongrels,” Mr. Cohen told them, pointing his pen to the back where Harry and the boys were sitting, “That’s the only free desk we have so one of you will have to take the couch until they bring in a new one.”

“That’s fine,” Louis shrugged as he patted Liam’s shoulder and lead him to the back before he split off in the direction of the couch.

Harry’s eyes followed Louis’s path until he saw Liam standing over them for a moment before he sat at the empty desk in their square.

“Your brother can sit here if he wants,” Harry told Liam, “We could make room.”

“But there are only four desks,” Liam furrowed his brows in confusion.

“He can have my seat,” Harry said, “I can sit with one of them.”

“You don’t have-“ Liam started but Harry was already getting out of his seat to wave Louis over.  Louis pointed at himself and Harry nodded at him eagerly.

“You can have my seat,” Niall told Harry as he got up and patted his now empty seat, “I’ll sit on Zayn.”

Liam frowned at them in confusion while they all shifted around until Niall was sitting in Zayn’s lap and Harry was sitting in Niall’s seat.

“Oh you guys didn’t have to do that,” Louis said when he’d come over, “The couch is actually really comfortable.”

“It’s fine,” Harry shrugged as casually as he could but he couldn’t help but trail his eyes over Louis’s entire frame. He was smaller than Harry and Zayn, about Niall’s size, but he was tan and toned and Harry liked what he saw.

“Are you sure?” Louis asked, his endearing smile back on his lips. Harry couldn’t help but to lick and bite his lips as he nodded.

“Watch yourself,” Niall muttered low enough so that only Harry and Zayn could hear him when Louis walked back to the couch to get his things and he caught Harry watching the way Louis’s bum filled out his chinos and how his biceps flexed as he picked up his things.

“So uh,” Liam cleared his throat and called their attention back to him, “What are you guys’s names?”

“I’m Zayn,” Zayn extended his hand to Liam and flashed him a genuine smile.

“I’m Niall,” Niall smiled but forewent the handshake.

“I’m Harry,” Harry said as Louis walked back over to the group of desks and put his stuff down on the desk Harry had been sitting in.

“Ok I got, Harry,” Louis smiled at Harry as he sat down, “But I missed the other two.”

“Zayn and Niall,” Liam told him.

“Ok,” Louis nodded at them, “I’m pretty good with names especially when they go with good-looking faces.”

Niall and Zayn both smiled at each other while Harry flushed and shifted around in his seat.

“Hey, what are you lot doing back there?” Mr. Cohen barked at them from the front.

“Just trying to make the new guys feel welcome,” Zayn put his hands up innocently from where they’d been around Niall’s waist.

Mr. Cohen pointed his pen at them and glared at them accusingly, “You better keep your hands and feet to yourselves.” He’d caught the three of them messing around in the middle of the class too many times to believe they were capable of doing anything that wasn’t mischievous. He never ratted them out but he’d given them a fair share of warnings not to let it happen again (though it always did). He grumbled something before he went back to shuffling papers around on his desk.

+++

The rest of Global Studies passed by fairly quickly, the boys spending more time talking and joking around in the back than on the worksheets Mr.Cohen had passed out to them. English class went over the same for the most part (although Mr. Sivan complained more than Mr. Cohen because the boys were supposed to be reading Oedipus, not running their mouths).

Finally lunch came, where they were free to talk as much and as loud as they wanted to. They shuffled through the line and Harry and Niall led Louis and Liam to their table in the middle of the left side while Zayn hung in the back talking to Liam.

“How’re you guys liking it so far?” Harry asked when they’d sat down and started to eat. Liam looked like he was still a bit nervous to eat while Niall on the other hand was shoveling his food into his mouth. “Could you maybe-?“ Harry rested his hand on Niall’s thigh to silently tell him to stop being a savage in front of the cute new boys.

“What? I’m hungry,” Niall frowned and returned to piling his food in his mouth.

“You’ll have to excuse him,” Zayn shook his head and laughed as he ruffled Niall’s blonde hair, “He’s a bit uncivilized when it comes to eating.”

“And everything else,” Harry muttered, bulging his eyes and shaking his head. Louis laughed which made Harry smile and laugh along too even though he hadn’t meant to be funny.

“Uh, it’s ok,” Liam finally answered with a shrug, “It’s kind of weird not seeing girls, though.”

Niall rolled his eyes and Zayn shrugged, “Eh. The girls school is just down the road. I can take you one night if you want to go.”

“Isn’t that like against the rules?” Liam asked, concern washing over his face.

Zayn let out a little endeared laugh at his cuteness, “Yeah but I mean if you want girls, that’s where they are.”

“Mischevious, I like you,” Louis smiled at him. Zayn smirked back at him just as Harry squeezed his thigh under the table, a bit too harsh to be flirty but more of as a silent warning.

“Other than that,” Harry’s harshness spilled over into his tone a bit, “How is it?”

“It’s nice, I guess,” Louis pulled his gaze from Zayn to look at Harry, “It’s a nice building. The teachers seem pretty cool so far and you lot seem nice enough. But we have only made it through half a day to be fair so the verdict’s still out, I suppose.”

“Well Mrs. Heathrow’s great,” Zayn told him, “Really fit bird. Mr.Long, is neither fit nor a bird. He’s short and stumpy and kind of an arse but it’s fun to fuck with him.”

Zayn and Louis talked for a while about pranks while Liam sat playing with his food, lost in his own mind and Harry surveyed Niall who was eating more slowly now but more quiet than he usually was.

“You ok?” Harry leaned over and whispered in his ear with a squeeze of his hand to Niall’s knee. Niall nodded.

“You sure?” Harry asked. He caught Louis watching them for a moment before he looked back at Zayn. Niall nodded again but Harry knew he was lying. “Meet me in the bathroom in a couple minutes ok?” he squeezed Niall’s knee again and pressed a covert kiss to the shell of his ear before he pulled away.

“I think I left my math book in the room. I’ll meet you guys in Bio,” Harry announced as he rose from his seat and picked up his tray. Zayn, Liam, and Niall just glanced at him. Louis was the only one that waved him a goodbye.  Harry blushed and smiled with a wave back before he walked away.

 

Less than two minutes later, Niall was walking into the bathroom and locking the door behind him. He pressed Harry back against the sink to envelop their mouths in a kiss but Harry held up a finger after a minute to stop him.

“What?” Niall asked.

“Unlock it,” Harry instructed, “You know how much trouble we got in last time for locking the door.”

“Well what if someone walks in,” Niall asked, though he went to unlock the door anyways.

“We won’t be long,” Harry said as he grabbed Niall’s hand and lead him to the last stall and shut the door behind him, “Plus it’s not like we’re doing anything.”

“Then what did you pull me in here for?” Niall asked.

“Because I could tell you didn’t want to be there,” Harry shrugged.

“I’m trying to be nice, Haz, I really am. It’s not them; they’re great. It’s just all this stuff with Zayn,” Niall looked down. Harry put his thumb under Niall’s chin and picked his face back up to peck him.

“I thought you guys worked everything out this morning before class,” Harry said.

Niall shrugged, “He apologized for pissing me off but that was about it. Do you think I’m being overly jealous?”

Harry gave him another kiss and pulled Niall into a hug where Niall buried his face into Harry’s neck, “Zayn’s a gorgeous boy. It’d be hard for anyone not to get jealous over him.”

“Thanks, Haz,” Niall kissed his neck and then pulled out of their hug, “Thanks for like listening and helping me deal with all of this.”

Harry hooked his arm over Niall’s shoulder and led them out of the bathroom back towards Mrs. Heathrow’s room, “That’s what friends are for: not to suck your dick, but to help you with your problems.”

+++

Zayn relaxed as he dipped his brush into the brown paint and started on one of Harry’s curls for his portrait project for art. Electives were the only class that the boys hadn’t shared. As much as Niall loved spending time with his boys, he didn’t have enough inner peace to be content with sitting around listening to Nirvana and drawing when he could be running around throwing balls at people so he’d opted to take PE class in place of where Zayn and Harry had signed up for Art. Apparently, Louis also shared Niall’s case of rambunctiousness because he’d signed up for PE as well while Liam had signed up for Music.

“Did you guys go back to the dorms to fuck?” Zayn asked as he swirled his brush around to form one of Harry’s ringlets.

“No,” Harry answered while he stroked his black dipped brush up to form Zayn’s raven quiff.

“Ok,” Zayn shrugged, his head bobbing along to the instrumental piano rendition of “How to Save a Life” by the Fray that Mrs. Freeman was playing softly in the background.

“Why, would you’ve been jealous?” Harry asked and cocked his brow.

“No,” Zayn snorted, “I’m not petty like you two.”

“Then why’d you ask?”

“Because Niall left right after you did. I gave him a look but he just left anyways. I thought we were ok, but I guess not,” Zayn shrugged again.

“Maybe it’s better that way,” Harry shrugged too, using Zayn’s quote from earlier against him.

“What?”Zayn asked.

“Well I mean if you’re going to break up with him you might as well do it while things are already weird instead of getting things right just to take it all away again,” Harry explained.

“Stop saying we’re breaking up,” Zayn frowned as he violently dabbed his brush back into the paint, “You make it sound so awful when you call it a break up.”

“I don’t know what you want me to say,” Harry shrugged again.

“Harry,” Mrs. Freeman called from the front, “Wash up. You’ve got a note here from Headmaster Grimshaw.”

“Again?” Zayn asked as Harry stood and pulled off his apron. Harry just glanced at him before he put his apron in the ‘Dirty’ cart, washed his hands, and went to the front to claim the note. Nick was apparently requesting that he go get Liam and Louis and show them to his office. If anyone really wanted to call them out they could use the fact that Nick could have just sent the pass runner to show them the way, but no one did so Harry gathered his things and left.

 

He got Liam first since Music was down the hall from Art and they moved in pretty much silence as they walked down the halls to the gym.

When they’d finally reached it, Harry pushed the red doors open to find Niall and Louis (amongst others) in the midst of a somewhat heated dodgeball game. Harry thanked God that they were on the same team so that they wouldn’t hurt each other but also for the fact that Niall was getting an outlet to release all of his pent up aggression from the day.

There were only a few more people left on either side so Harry lead Liam to the bleachers so that they could sit down and wait for the end of the game before Harry had to pull Louis out of class.

Niall threw a ball right at Clay Hambell’s crotch that left him keeling over in pain while Niall and Louis shared a slick high five and laugh. Drew Pinsky tried to return the favor from the opposing side but his ball missed whereas Louis’s ball hit its target which was Drew’s stomach, winning his and Niall’s team the game.

Niall yelled a ‘Wey hey!’ as he jumped onto Louis’s back and cheered and Harry and Liam clapped politely from the bleachers before they got up to walk over towards them.

“Hey, what are you doing here?” Niall asked as he got down from Louis’s back and wrapped his arm around Harry’s waist.

Harry smiled at him and then at Louis. Louis’s fringe was matted down to his forehead with sweat and Harry tried his best not to look through his joggers and make out the shape of Louis’s cock. “Uh, I’ve come to get Louis actually,” Harry told them when his mouth decided to work again.

“Me?” Louis asked, pretending he was aghast.

“Yeah, N- Headmaster Grimshaw wants to talk to you guys in his office,” Harry rubbed his neck at his almost slip up.

“For what?” Louis asked, “We’ve only just gotten here. I haven’t even managed to do anything yet.”

“I mean it’s probably nothing bad,” Harry shrugged.

“Fine,” Louis shrugged back, “But can I like change or at least rinse my sweat off first.”

Harry bit his lip. He wanted to say no, that Louis should stay just like that, plastered bangs and sweat and flexing biceps and jogger dick for the rest of his life but he couldn’t. “Uh, it probably won’t take long,” Harry told him, “But you can rinse your face off or summat really quickly if you want.”

“Ok,” Louis nodded, “Well I’ll go do that then. I’ll meet you guys out front in like two minutes.”

Harry nodded and watched Louis jog into the locker room while Liam turned to walk away. He was about to follow Liam but Niall’s arm around his waist pulled him in closer. “Don’t keep him out too long; he was my best player,” Niall whispered into Harry’s ear.

“I thought I was your best player,” Harry faked a frown and Niall kissed his cheek with a giggle.

“You’re the best at giving cuddles but you’re shit at dodgeball and you know it,” Niall laughed and rubbed his sweaty face into Harry’s neck.

“I’ll take it,” Harry smiled as he kissed Niall’s hair and then pulled away.

“I mean it though,” Niall said to him as Harry started to walk away and Louis emerged from the locker room, “Don’t take too long.”

 

“Hey,” Louis smiled as he did a little half jog and caught up with Liam and Harry.

“Hey,” Harry smiled back at him.

“Thanks for waiting for me,” Louis flicked his hair out of his eyes and Harry’s stomach did a flick of its own.

“No problem,” Harry tried to shrug casually.

“How’s your day been?” Louis asked as they made their way down the hall.

“Are you asking me or your brother?” Harry asked.

“Well I already know how Liam’s day has been. We’ve been asked like every two minutes since we got here,” Louis laughed. Harry and Liam both let out little giggles of their own.

“Well my day’s been ok. Thanks for asking,” Harry told him with a shy grin.

Louis smiled back and nodded just as they’d reached the main office, “Well good.”

“Here we are,” Harry ushered them in through the lobby to the back where Nick’s office was. He knocked and waited for Nick to answer the door.

 Nick looked down at Harry for a moment before he looked past him towards where Louis and Liam were standing, “Gentlemen, come in. Mr. Styles, I’ll speak to you in a moment when I’m done with them.” Harry nodded and took his usual seat in one of the brown plush chairs outside of Nick’s office.

 

“Well hello boys,” Nick smiled at them as he shut the door behind him, “You can have a seat if you’d like but this won’t take too long.”

“Um ok,” Louis nodded at Liam before they both took seats in the chairs in front of Headmaster Grimshaw’s desk.

“Well it’s nothing bad if that’ll get rid of your terrified looks,” Nick smiled at them again as he took a sip from his mug, which Louis found weird that he’d still be drinking tea or coffee or anything from a mug at two-thirty in the afternoon.

“What’s this about then?” Louis asked. Liam looked at him in shock for speaking to the Headmaster so bluntly but then again Louis had never been one to beat around the bush.

“Well I just wanted to see how you boys were adjusting so far,” Nick told them, “If you like the classes, if you’ve made friends, things like that.”

“Well it’s a bit soon to tell innit?” Louis asked.

 Nick’s eyes narrowed just a bit at him but the smile on his lips still remained, “Well I just wanted to check.”

“We’re adjusting fine,” Liam piped up, “The classes are good. The kids are nice. Everything is nice.”

Nick took his gaze from Louis to Liam, “Good. I’m glad at least one of you likes it here.” Louis eyed Nick up and down skeptically until Nick looked back at him.

“Is there anything else?” Louis asked.

“Liam?” Nick said and Liam looked at him immediately, “You’re free to go back to class now. Louis will be out in just a mo’ if you need help navigating your way back.” Liam stood up and fumbled his way to the door awkwardly.

“He’s in Music, I’m in gym,” Louis told him, “Even if I knew my way around here, wouldn’t it make more sense for Harry to take him back?” Nick’s eyes narrowed at Louis even more.

“No, Lou it’s fine, I um- I’ll find my own way back. It’s ok,” Liam said before he turned the knob and left the room.

“Mr. Tomlinson, I’m afraid I’m not a big fan of your attitude,” Nick said as he slit his eyes impossibly more when Liam had shut the door behind him.

“No attitude here, _sir_ ,” Louis said frankly. Nick glared at him for another moment but Louis held his gaze without backing down.

“Mr. Tomlinson you questioned me four times within one minute of your visit to my office. That is more than any student here is allowed to question me in a lifetime,” Nick said sternly, “I have high hopes that you and your brother will do well here but with an attitude like yours, you might not last. I suggest you fix it.”

“Yes sir,” Louis continued to hold his gaze for another tense moment.

“You can go back to class now, Mr. Tomlinson,” Nick grumbled and Louis popped up from his seat immediately, “Send Mr. Styles in now, please.”

 

“What happened? Why’d he keep you back” Harry asked when Louis finally came through the door.

“Because he’s an asshole; I don’t know,” Louis shrugged, “But he wants to talk to you. Should I wait or-?”

“No it’s fine,” Harry shook his head, “It might be a while. Um, I’ll see you at dinner ok? Or maybe during Lounge Time but probably dinner.” Louis frowned at Harry’s sudden weirdness but Harry just waved and walked into Nick’s office. Shutting the door (and Louis) behind him.

“What was that?” Harry asked, leaning back against the door while Nick watched him from his desk.

“Get away from the door, Harry,” Nick instructed him. Harry frowned at him, “Lock the door quietly and then move away from it.” Harry followed the instructions and then walked over to sit in the seat that Louis had been sitting in moments before.

“Are you friends with him?” Nick asked when Harry was seated.

“Why?” Harry asked back.

“Answer my question first,” Nick ordered.

“I barely know him. Yeah though, I guess. _Why_?” Harry asked again.

“Well you shouldn’t be. He looks like trouble. Keep the brother around though, he seems nice enough,” Nick told him.

“Zayn ‘looks like trouble’ but I’m friends with him,” Harry argued.

“Although Zayn has a few bad habits of his own that I’m not a fan of, he hasn’t had the nerve to question me like that Tomlinson did within only a few minutes of being in here,” Nick frowned.

“Do you not like it when people don’t treat you like God?” Harry tried him which made Nick’s frown deepen even more.

“You’re already starting to get his flippant attitude,” Nick rolled his eyes.

“I am not,” Harry argued.

“I was hoping we could get in a little repeat of yesterday, but I’m not sure I want it anymore,” Nick started to shuffle some papers around on his desk.

“I’m not sure I want it either,” Harry grumbled under his breath in annoyance.

“What was that?” Nick asked.

“Nothing _sir_ ,” Harry snarked, “Are you going to send me back to class now or would you like me to sit in here while you push papers around with the door locked.”

“What’s the matter with you?” Nick leaned back in his chair to look at Harry again. Harry’s bravado instantly shrunk under Nick’s authoritative gaze. “I don’t know what’s gotten into you, whether it’s these new boys or something else, but whatever it is, you better fix it.” He glanced over at his paddle on the wall and then back at Harry, “ _Or I will_.”

Harry set his face in a frown as he watched Nick rise from his seat behind the desk to pluck the paddle from its hook on the wall.

“Do I need to fix this?” Nick asked as he smacked the wooden paddle against his hand, making Harry jump out of his skin. Harry bit his lip and shifted around in his seat without speaking which provoked Nick even further, “Answer me.”

“You can’t,” Harry mumbled quietly.

“I can’t what?” Nick stepped to tower over Harry. Harry looked up at him, still biting his lips as Nick snaked a hand into his curls, “I can’t _what_?”

“I- There’s someone else,” Harry muttered, “that I’ve been- doing things with. They saw the bite on my hip yesterday. You- we can’t leave any more marks.”

Nick glared down at him and let go of his curls, “Who was it and what did you say?”

“I didn’t say anything and you know I can’t tell you who but we really need to be more careful,” Harry told him, his eyes on the floor.

“All’s fair in love and corporal punishment,” Nick looked at him with a devilish grin on his lips.

+++

Harry had never been more thankful for Lounge Time than he was that day when he’d left Nick’s office a half hour later, his bum red and burning from Nick’s ‘licks of love’ that felt more painful than they did lovely. There was no way Harry could sit on the stools in art so he went back to the dorms instead.

He sat around in his bed for a while hitting his head on his pillow over and over wishing that it would stop spinning. He was in too deep with too many people and he was literally starting to feel the backlash because of it. Nick, Niall, Zayn, and now maybe even Louis too? Granted only if Louis was gay but he’d been flirty and smiley with Harry all day so maybe he was? Harry hoped he was anyways. But then he felt guilty for cheating on Niall. As if it weren’t bad enough already that he was fooling around with Nick now he was thinking about fooling around with Louis too? Harry was thoroughly fucked.

+++

“Hey babe,” Niall said as he walked in and tossed his things on the floor twenty minutes later. Harry’d fallen asleep after he’d spent enough time stressing himself out over his predicament. “Came here to pass out after your trip to Grimshaw’s?” Niall asked as he crawled into Harry’s bed and gave him a peck.

“How’d you know about that?” Harry asked, his voice still a bit rough from sleep.

“Zayn told me you left from Art and never came back,” Niall told him.

“Well I was tired,” Harry lied, “It’s been a pretty eventful day.” At least that part was true and Niall nodded his agreement.

“Well you can go back to sleep if you want,” Niall shrugged, “I can start on my homework or something.”

“I _would_ like to take another nap actually,” Harry yawned, “But it’d be better if you laid down with me.

“‘If I lay here, if I just lay here, would you lie with me and just forget the world?’” Niall sang and pecked him again.

“Will you?” Harry mumbled as he rubbed his curls against Niall’s cheek.

“Anytime,” Niall kissed him again and cuddled into Harry’s warmth impossibly more.

+++

“Harry … Haz … Harry … _Haz_ ” Niall whispered, trying to rouse the sleeping boy beside him. He knew Harry didn’t like to wake up alone but he wasn’t waking up at all and according to Niall’s stomach, it was  time for dinner. Niall gave Harry the time it took him to change into fresh clothes and rinse his face off before he was sitting over him again in Harry’s rolling chair from his desk, trying to shake him awake.

“Harry. Harry! Get up! I’m hungry!” Niall said more loudly this time, finally causing Harry to stir in the opposite direction of his voice.

“Shut up and get back in bed,” Harry grumbled as he rolled away from Niall’s voice.

“Harry, it’s time for dinner and I’m hungry. Unless you want to sleep through dinner, I suggest you get up,” Niall told him.

“A few more minutes,” Harry whined.

Niall rolled his eyes and sighed, “Fine.”

“Get back in bed so I know you didn’t leave,” Harry whined and opened his arms for Niall to slot himself back through. Niall rolled his eyes but took his shoes back off and crawled into Harry’s arms.

“You have five more minutes,” Niall grumbled as Harry clung onto him and nuzzled into Niall’s neck.

“Ten,” Harry breathed.

“Seven,” Niall compromised.

“Seven minutes in heaven,” Harry yawned and Niall couldn’t help but to giggle in fondness. He still wanted to kill Harry for making him wait for his food but there was nothing cuter than a vulnerable, sleepy Harry.

+++

“Nice of you two to join us,” Zayn said when Harry and Niall sat down at the table a few minutes late. Of course it would annoy Zayn that he was early and they were late since he only came early because Niall was always early for meals. But at least he’d had Liam and Louis to sit with so he couldn’t have been that miserable. He’d seemed to hit it off with them well enough.

“He was sleeping,” Niall grumbled as he sat down and took a bite of his mashed potatoes.

“Well why didn’t you just wake him up?” Zayn asked.

“I did,” Niall held a glare with Zayn for a moment before Harry put his hand under the table to touch Niall’s thigh and reached his foot over to stroke Zayn’s calf soothingly, silently telling them not to start again. Not when they had guests.

“I was tired,” Harry explained to Zayn.

“That why you didn’t come back for Art?” Zayn snorted and took a bite of the cooling chicken on his plate.

Harry’s chest tightened and he set his jaw until Zayn looked back up at him. He looked at Zayn with a warning look and dropped his foot from his calf. _Not here. Not now._

“What did he even want anyways? That’s the second time in two days you’ve had to see him,” Niall asked as he took a bite of his own chicken.

Harry finally looked away from Zayn to start on his own food, “I had to take Louis and Liam to his office.”

“For what?” Niall asked them.

“To ‘see how we were adjusting’,” Louis held up air quotes, “I’m not too big a fan, though?”

“Why?” Zayn asked with another snort.

“He seems like an ass,” Louis shrugged, “A creepy asshole.”

“He’s nice,” Harry said meekly, pushing his food around on his plate.  Louis shrugged again.

“Well hopefully that’s the last of your chats, at least during PE anyways. Cause Clay got me back with a hit straight to my balls after you left,” Niall told Louis which made him laugh. Harry relaxed at the sight of Louis’s smile and because they were finally done with the touchy subjects.

“Fuck him,” Louis took a bite of his mash, “He seems like a dick too.”

“Oh he is,” Niall agreed, “He thinks just because he’s tall and has long hair now he’s like the second Jesus.” All the boys laughed.

“Is it like super religious here?” Liam asked, finally joining the conversation.

“Well we don’t have forced prayers and nuns and stuff walking around,” Niall said, “But there are some snotty people and optional morning and nightly prayers. But Sunday is Sabbath day. You have to go to mass in the morning and confession in the afternoon and then bible study in the evening. And we’re not allowed to watch TV; we have to like go frolic in nature and play with each other.” Harry, Zayn, and Louis all snorted and laughed but Liam missed his joke.

“Only if you’re into it,” Zayn laughed.

“He’s not, I don’t think,” Louis vouched for him before he took in a spoonful of mash.

“I’m not what?” Liam frowned.

“Are you?” Harry asked Louis cheekily, taking a sip from his cup.

Louis did a little half shrug with a smirk, “I mean I can’t say I was too down about coming to an all-boys Catholic school. Wish there were uniforms though.”

Zayn and Harry shared a smile while Niall laughed and Liam sat quiet and uncomfortable.

“You’d look good in a uniform,” Harry told him.

“You think so?” Louis smirked at him again.

Harry nodded, “Yeah. Maybe not with a blazer; you don’t seem like the blazer type but everything else.”

“Yeah unless it’s weed, I don’t do blazers. And I’ll admit my bum does fill out khakis pretty well, but I think uniforms would look better on everyone else, not me,” Louis took another bite of his mash. Harry had to fend off the thought of Louis’s bum in (and out) of a pair of clinging khakis before he got painfully hard at the table.

“You smoke?” Zayn asked eagerly.

Louis shrugged with his cheeky little grin again, “Yeah. I think that’s probably one of the only cons about being here is not being able to like smoke and stuff.”

“Well I know people,” Zayn told him, “My stash is small but I’ve got some things if you ever wanna.”

“Wow thanks,” Louis nodded at him eagerly, “I’d love to.”

“Does Liam?” Zayn’s eyes traveled down the table to Liam who still hadn’t spoken since Niall’s foolishness.

“No,” Louis shook his head and hooked his arm over Liam’s shoulder, “Mr. Straightedge here doesn’t do much other than study and play video games.”

“That’s cool too,” Zayn sent a smile down to him that Liam couldn’t help but to reciprocate. His was smaller and less bright but it was still a smile nonetheless, “I love video games too. And it’d be nice to have someone to play with.” Liam’s eyes widened at that and Zayn tried his hardest not to laugh, “To play video games with, I mean. Niall and Harry aren’t much for them.”

“You’re not?” Louis asked them.

“Well I can’t really sit still long enough to finish the game,” Niall shrugged, “And Harry here is just shit at them.”

“Hey,” Harry frowned but Niall kissed his cheek and ruffled his hair. Harry looked over to try and catch Louis’s reaction. He was watching them. His face wasn’t disgusted (which was good). He actually looked _intrigued_. It prompted him to kiss Niall’s cheek and tug Niall’s darker bottom strands in return. Whether it was meant to be a show that this was more than friendly joking or a ploy to make Louis jealous, Harry wasn’t sure which but Niall pressed a kiss to his neck that didn’t stop until Liam was shifting around in his seat, clearly uncomfortable again, Louis was reaching under the table to adjust himself, and Zayn kicked Niall under the table telling him to stop.

“So um, what do we do after dinner?” Louis asked when Niall finally pulled away and Harry opened his eyes again.

“Basically more Lounge Time until lights out at 11,” Zayn answered.

“What do we do?” Louis asked.

“Well there’s a Rec Room but you probably already knew that. That’s where all the good stuff is: the games, the TVs. But everyone goes in there so it can get a bit crowded. There are trails and stuff around the Lake though, if you’re into walks and nature and all that, and some directors take people out to town for different activities. I think they might be going out for mini golf tonight or summat,” Niall answered.

“What are you guys doing?” Louis asked. All three of them shared a look. That was usually the time they spent together in Harry’s bed. _Usually_. If they liked where the directors were going or if Zayn wanted to play video games, they’d do something different but they almost always spent their Lounge Time together in Harry’s bed. They all liked Louis and Liam but they all also knew from the day they’d had, they needed that time to unwind and probably talk about a few things.

“Well uh- Harry and I have to work on a thing for Global Studies,” Niall rubbed the back of his neck.

“Mhm,” Louis raised his brow, knowing they were full of shit. “Are you free?” Louis looked at Zayn.

“He’s helping,” Niall spoke for him before Zayn could accept Louis’s offer, “But uh- it shouldn’t take long. We can meet you guys at your rooms when we’re done and then we can all do something together later.”

Louis slit his eyes but nodded anyways.

“Where are your rooms?” Harry asked them gently.

“I’m in A-12,” Louis said.

“I’m in B-23,” Liam finally spoke again.

“Hey, that’s my room. Cool,” Zayn smiled at him again, “I can walk you there if you need help finding it.”

Liam nodded at him, “Ok.”

“I can show you to your room,” Harry offered to Louis even though his and Niall’s room was all the way down in D-Hall.

“Okay,” Louis smiled at him again and nodded.

“I’ll just meet you guys in our room, I guess,” Niall said. They all nodded and stood to throw away their trays before they went their separate ways: Zayn with Liam, Harry with Louis, and Niall on his own.

+++

“I’m sure you’re probably tired of people asking how your day is so I won’t,” Zayn said as he walked Liam down the corridor to their room.

“I am a bit tired of the phrase, yeah,” Liam admitted, “We’re adjusting well. We’re doing ok. Everything’s fine.”

“Are you?” Zayn asked cautiously. Liam just looked at him instead of answering. “Louis seems to like it here so far but you seem … tense.”

Liam shrugged defensively, “It’s … different. Things around here are different than I expected them to be.”

“Well what exactly were you expecting?” Zayn asked as he opened the door and let Liam go into the room first.

Liam put his things down and sat in the chair at his desk, “I’m not sure, but not this. Like it’s not nearly as strict and religious as I thought it’d be.”

“Yeah,” Zayn shrugged, “But I like it better this way.”

“I suppose,” Liam said and then paused before he spoke again, “You don’t have to answer this if you don’t want since it’s probably an awkward question but like- are Harry and Niall …?” Liam didn’t bother with finishing the question. He chose to fiddle with the threads on his comforter instead.

“Fucking?” Zayn provided.

“Well I meant together in general,” Liam said quietly, still not looking at Zayn.

“Yeah,” Zayn shrugged, “We all are.” Liam’s hand paused and Zayn had to try really hard not to laugh and scare him even more.

“I thought- the girls school-and your comment about Mrs.Heathrow- I’m sorry,” Liam stumbled over his words and Zayn smiled as he walked over to Liam’s bed. He nodded his head at the bed before Liam nodded back and Zayn sat down.

“We aren’t exclusive, at least I’m not. We do it because we’re here and because we’re hot but that’s as far as it goes,” Zayn told him. Liam frowned. “What?”

“Nothing,” Liam shook his head, “It’s really none of my business.”

“No, go ahead and ask,” Zayn told him encouragingly.

“I just- I never understood people like that. Louis teases me all the time about being a ‘hopeless romantic’ but I just don’t get how you could give your body to someone but feel nothing about it,” Liam’s face flushed as he spoke. For a guy who hadn’t said much all day, he sure was talking now. But Zayn liked it. Niall and Harry were smart but they never challenged him mentally and emotionally the way that Liam was right now. It was nice.

“You’re a virgin aren’t you?” Zayn asked and Liam’s face flushed again. “It’s fine,” Zayn smiled and ran his hand under Liam’s chin to pick his face back up, “Virgins are innocent and sweet. Everybody loves a virgin.” He let go of Liam’s face. “But you’re right; sex should mean something. And it does when it’s with the right person. It can be special when it’s with the right person; when it’s with someone you love. Don’t get me wrong, Harry and Niall are both very special to me and I care about them a lot but I’m not in love with them. What we do isn’t about love. It’s about fucking. Things might be different between the two of them but for me it’s just sex.” Liam nodded.

“But I better go,” Zayn got off the bed and felt Liam’s eyes still on him as he walked to the door, “I’ll see you in a little bit ok?” Liam nodded again and Zayn left.

+++

“Have you met your roommate yet?” Harry asked as they walked down the hall towards Louis’s room.

“I’m single,” Louis told him.

Harry blushed and Louis turned to look at him, catching his reddened face. “I’m _in_ a single,” he laughed, “I think it’s my mom’s way of apologizing for sticking me here.”

“Oh,” Harry nodded, “Well I mean it’s not so bad here. And you could always come to me and Niall’s if you like- get bored or lonely or something.”

“Not sure if Niall would like that too much,” Louis said.

“What do you mean?” Harry asked.

“I can’t really tell if he likes us very much or not,” Louis shrugged.

Harry frowned, “No, Lou, he does! He said you were his best player during dodgeball.”

“Well is it because of you then?” Louis asked and it caught Harry by surprise.

“What do you mean?” Harry asked again.

“Well it’s pretty obvious that you two like each other if you’re not actually together already,” Louis shrugged.

“Uh,” Harry rubbed his neck.

“It’s fine,” Louis told him, “I’m not a homophobe or anything. I think it’s pretty obvious that I’m quite the opposite, actually. I just know you’re not rushing to your room to go work on homework.”

Harry bit his lip and lolled his head, “You don’t know that for sure.”

“I’m pretty sure,” Louis smirked, “The only thing I don’t get is why you guys need Zayn.”

“He’s filming our sex tape,” Harry joked and Louis laughed.

“You know I’d actually believe that,” Louis laughed as they rounded the last corner before A-Hall.

“Would you buy it?” Harry teased.

“Buy? Nah. But I’d watch it maybe,” Louis joked. Yeah, Harry definitely liked him.

“What if Zayn was in it?” Harry pressed.

Louis smirked, “All three of you together or would he be subbing for one of you?”

“He does that too,” Harry whispered beside Louis’s ear with a smirk of his own. The look on Louis’s face and the way he immediately had to grab his cock through his jeans were priceless to Harry.

“Oh God,” Louis gasped as he rested against the doorframe away from Harry.

“This you?” Harry asked, nodding to the door with a satisfied grin on his lips.

“This is me,” Louis nodded.

“Ok,” Harry smiled, “Well I’ll see you in a little bit then.” He leaned forward and pressed a daring kiss to the slighter boy’s cheek, “Take care of yourself,” he waved before he left Louis ready to pass out against his doorframe.

+++

Harry was the last one back to the room. Zayn and Niall had already pushed his and Niall’s beds together in preparation. They were currently sitting at Niall’s desk (Niall in Zayn’s lap with Zayn’s arm around his waist) while they scrolled through Niall’s laptop looking at something for English.

“Are we actually doing homework tonight?” Harry asked as he shut the door behind him. They both laughed before Harry walked over and gave them each a peck on the lips.

“You were taking a while so I asked the baby prof here to read through some of my stuff,” Niall informed him.

“Grimshaw’s very impressed with my English grade by the way,” Harry ran his hand through Zayn’s hair affectionately and kissed him again.

“Good. ‘s nice to know you aren’t in trouble after your two day stay at the Headmaster Hotel,” Zayn joked, “I really wish you would’ve come back to art though. It’s kind of difficult to work on a portrait when your subject isn’t there.”

“ ‘m sorry babe,” Harry kissed him again, “But I really was tired. I promise I’ll be there tomorrow though.”

“Good,” he kissed Harry a fourth time before he kissed Niall’s neck, knowing he was probably starting to get antsy by now.

“We missed you too by the way,” Harry told him as he pulled Niall from Zayn’s arms to sit with him on the bed.

“What do you mean?” Zayn asked, watching as they took each other’s shirts off.

“I mean it’s been a couple of days since you’ve been with us,” Harry said, knowing Niall probably hadn’t spoken up for himself yet. He knew Zayn had said that morning that he was going to break things off with them but from the way he’d been acting after that it seemed like he wasn’t. He’d also said that he would be at Perrie’s tonight but he was here right now and Harry took it as a sign that he probably didn’t plan on following through with the breakup either.

“I’ve been with you guys all day,” Zayn said.

“You know what he means, Zayn,” Niall finally spoke while Harry pulled off his jeans, leaving them both in just their boxers.

“Well I’m here now,” Zayn told the both of them, finality heavy in his tone.

Harry pressed a gentle kiss to Niall’s shoulder and kissed his way up Niall’s neck, his curls falling over his eyes endearingly, until Niall turned from where he was staring at Zayn to kiss Harry back. Niall leaned back into the bed and Harry crawled on top of him, slotting their legs together and slipping his tongue further into Niall’s mouth while he searched for Niall’s hand to hold.

Zayn shucked off his pants and shirt and walked over beside the bed frame to push Harry’s hair back from where it was covering their faces. Harry looked up and thanked him with a kiss while he rutted up between Niall’s thighs to rub their hardening cocks together.

 Niall reached his hand out over the end of the bedframe to pull Zayn over by the waistband of his Calvin Kleins and Zayn followed. He slowly crept up onto the bed and laid down beside where Niall was laying with Harry on top of him. Zayn looked at him hesitantly for a moment before Niall leaned over to press a soft kiss to his unsure lips.

Harry smiled to himself as he crawled lower down Niall’s body, peppering him with kisses along the way before he stopped and pulled Niall’s boxers down to reveal his hard, pink cock. Harry sucked him into his mouth immediately and Niall’s hand found its way into Harry’s curls to play with them while he kissed Zayn.

“Am I allowed to fuck you?” Zayn asked into Niall’s mouth when Niall had reached his hand over to stroke Zayn off through the fabric of his briefs.

Harry looked up to see the way Niall’s face frowned at that. When they did this, they never talked about it; they just let themselves fit in wherever their bodies ended up. It was supposed to be natural. Zayn asking for permission meant that something had changed; that all of his time spent learning Perrie had meant that he’d started to lose his intuition with Harry and Niall and that wasn’t okay with either of them.

“Of course,” Niall whispered, a bit of hurt in his voice.

Harry pulled off of Niall’s cock to reach over and pull out the lube and a condom for Zayn. That was another shitty thing about Zayn being with Perrie;  it meant they’d had had to start using condoms again (or at least Zayn had to). Harry and Niall had considered suffering through using condoms as well but came to the conclusion that if Zayn was the only one who wanted to fuck someone else, he was the only one that was going to be forced to wear condoms. It was like a latex dunce cap for his dick.

Zayn slicked up his first finger and rubbed it around Niall’s tight pink hole before he finally pressed it in, making Niall’s eyes slip shut in a mix of pleasure and agony. Harry crawled back up to the top of the bed to envelop Niall’s mouth into another long kiss while Zayn pressed in a second finger and nudged at the spot in Niall’s bum that made pearls of joy leak from Niall’s cock. Harry reached a hand down to stroke Niall off while Niall reached up to get Harry off as well. Zayn leaned forward to join their kiss before he backed away and attached his lips to Niall’s neck instead.

When he’d thought Niall’d had enough prep, he slipped his fingers out with a ‘squelch’ of protest from Niall’s bum and replaced them with his cock. Niall took him into his warmth immediately and Zayn pressed in slowly to keep from hurting him but pressed into Niall until his balls were touching Niall’s bum. He pulled out just enough to push straight into Niall’s prostate again which caused him to yelp into Harry’s mouth.

“Fuck,” Niall whined at the overstimulation of having Harry’s warm hand around his cock while Zayn was buried deep inside of him.

Harry crossed over to lay on Niall’s left side, opposite Zayn so that he’d have a good view of the show while he continued to stroke Niall off. He put a hand under Zayn’s chin to pick his head up from where he’d had it hung in concentration while he fucked into Niall so that he could slot their mouths together and they’d all be making each other feel something at the same time. That was what the most beautiful part of these nights in were for them was. No matter what else happened that day; no matter who made who mad or who hadn’t remembered to be equally affectionate to everyone; when they were all together like this, basking in each other’s warmth, being present with each other and making each other all feel good at the same time, nothing else mattered. They had each other and they had this and for those couple of moments, nothing else was more important.

Niall’s grip around Harry’s cock tightened the harder Zayn fucked into him and Zayn wrapped his hand over Niall’s to help hurry the process while he continued to suck Harry’s lips into his mouth.  Niall lifted his free hand to rub from the back of Zayn’s head down to his neck, his silent signal that he wanted a kiss from Zayn too. Zayn obliged and immediately left Harry’s mouth to give Niall a kiss of his own.

Harry shrank back to sprawl out on the bed beside them while they continued to jerk him off and Niall eventually turned his head away from Zayn to press a kiss to Harry’s shoulder. Harry rolled over onto his side so that he was pressed against Niall’s side and could watch up close while Zayn fucked into him and made Niall fall apart in his hands. It was amazing to watch the way that Zayn handled him; how they handled each other.

Niall trusted Zayn and gave him everything there was to give. Zayn took but he gave as well, more carefully than Niall did but he gave nonetheless. He was crafty and meticulous which drove someone as impatient as Niall wild sometimes but that’s what Harry was there for; to balance out the gaps that they left in each other. Where Zayn was careful and sedate, Harry was there to be exuberant and erratic right beside Niall which is why if anyone needed to get off in the middle of the day it was usually Niall and Harry. They were younger, dumber, messier than Zayn. They kissed all day whereas Zayn only kissed them in the morning and at night, rarely in between, which is why the nights they all spent together were so important. If anyone was going to pull away first it was going to be Zayn, so when he was in the room with them, showering them both with affection and showing them how much they both meant to him, it was important. It made Harry and Niall feel important.

Niall was the first one to come a short time later with a rough grunt and bite to Harry’s shoulder while he came all over Harry’s hand and their stomachs. Harry swiped his thumb through the puddle on Niall’s stomach (knowing his skin was extra sensitive after he comes but not caring) and lifted his thumb to his mouth to suck it clean. He leaned forward to kiss Zayn so that he could taste Niall from off of his tongue and Zayn let out a little sigh as he finally came too, Harry’s mouth still pressed to his. The only one left was Harry and Niall was quick to straddle his thighs while Zayn took off his soiled condom, tied it and tossed it away.

Niall kissed him, his hand still wrapped around Harry’s cock while Zayn slicked two fingers up and pressed them into Harry’s hole. He didn’t bother with being slow or gentle because he knew Harry liked the burn, the pain. He added in a third finger and thrusted his digits against Harry’s prostate, causing Harry to let out little breaths and whimpers in Niall’s mouth. Harry shifted around under Niall’s weight but Niall and Zayn both kept him still while they worked together on getting him off. Zayn kissed down the knobs of Niall’s spine that were displayed in front of him which made Niall arch his back under Zayn’s lips and rub his dampened skin across Harry’s. Harry took in a deep breath and held it for a moment before he finally released himself all over Niall’s hand.

Niall smiled into their kiss and reached his hand back around behind him to pull Zayn up to join them.

Zayn went to get some baby wipes from Niall’s side of the room to wipe his two dirty boys clean when they broke apart before he relaxed into their three way cuddle, Harry wrapped around Niall in the middle and Zayn turned on his side so that he could look at the both of them.

“You ok now?” Harry asked as he scratched from one of Niall’s tanned hips to the other and Niall smiled a lazy, satisfied grin.

“Good. You’ve been acting like a little bugger all day,” Zayn kissed his temple. Niall put his hand on Zayn’s chest and kissed him again while Harry stroked his hair back.

“Shit,” Harry mumbled after a moment.

“What?” Niall asked, rolling his head over from Zayn to look at Harry.

“Louis and Liam. We were supposed to meet them,” Harry told them.

Niall shrugged, “We can see them tomorrow.”

“Niall,” Harry said.

“What? We spent like the whole day with them. I want to stay here,” Niall pouted.

“You know Louis thinks you don’t like them,” Harry told him and Niall shrugged again.

“I didn’t say that. I was nice to him in Gym.”

“Well can you try to be nice to them all the time?” Harry asked with a graze of his nails down Niall’s chest.

“Why, do you like him?” Niall’s tone was joking but Harry could tell that it was still a loaded question.

“I think we could all be good friends if you’d try to be nicer,” Harry said.

“Friends like us or friends like friends?” Niall pressed. It was another question he’d tried to pass off as a joke but Harry knew better.

“Be _nice_ ,” Harry repeated and gave Niall a kiss though Niall was reluctant in kissing him back. Harry pressed off of the bed to get himself dressed again.

“Are you really leaving right now?” Niall asked, watching as Harry went across the room to check himself in the mirror.

“I’m not standing them up on their first day,” Harry shrugged and looked at Zayn, “Are you coming?”

Zayn looked from Harry to Niall and back at Niall while Niall tangled their legs under one of the comforters. “Stay,” Niall whispered into Zayn’s ear before he gave him a little bite and kiss on his neck.

“Don’t do that,” Harry scolded Niall for trying to sway Zayn’s decision.

Zayn bit his lip and looked at Harry again before he shook his head, “I think I’m going to stay.”

“Whipped little twat,” Harry mutterd under his breath.

“Isn’t that what you guys are always pestering me to do anyways?” Zayn asked, watching as Harry came back over to put on his shoes.

“Yes, but not when we’re _all_ supposed to be somewhere else. You’re both being rude,” Harry told them.

“Whatever, Harry. Enjoy your date,” Niall mumbled and pulled Zayn back to lay back down with him.

“Tell them we fell asleep,” Zayn said.

Harry rolled his eyes, “That better be all you two do while I’m gone.” He gave Niall a kiss on the forehead and Zayn a kiss on the lips before he left.

+++

He got to Liam’s room first and knocked before he opened the door. He was huddled at the desk on his side of the room, his laptop up and a brunette girl on the screen.

“Should I go?” Harry mouthed at him when Liam finally turned around to look at him.

“Who’s that in the corner?” The girl on the screen asked. Harry raised his brows but Liam motioned for him to come closer.

“This is Harry, Soph,” Liam told the girl on the screen. She waved and Harry waved back.

“Hi, I’m Sophia,” the girl introduced herself with a beautiful smile that was hidden beneath her full pink lips. She was enough for Harry to remember his occasional interest in playing for the other team.

“Hiii,” Harry waved at her again, “It’s nice to meet you.” She laughed and Harry smiled.

“Did you still want to come to the Rec Room or-?” Harry asked Liam quietly.

“Uh no, sorry,” Liam mouthed and rubbed his neck, “Tell Zayn I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine,” Harry smiled at him and patted him on the back. “Bye Sophia,” he waved at her before he waved at Liam and left.

 

So his boys were still in bed together and Liam was Facetiming with some hot girl from back home. It made Harry do a little jump-skip of excitement but he was also nervous about being alone with Louis again. There was just something about the older boy that made a set of butterflies go on a rampage every time Harry saw him.

He took some deep breaths and gathered himself before he knocked on Louis’s door. Louis came to the door fairly quickly, like he’d been waiting, and looked up into Harry’s face from where Harry stood a few inches taller than him.

“Is everyone already in the Rec Room?” Louis asked, taking in Harry’s solitary presence.

“Uh no,” Harry stumbled back to give Louis room to walk out of the door, “Zayn and Niall fell asleep and Liam’s talking to some girl on his laptop.

“Sophia?” Louis asked as he shut the door and locked it behind him.

“Yeah,” Harry nodded.

“Oh yeah, he probably won’t be leaving his room after that,” Louis said with a laugh, “Guess it’s just you and I tonight then, huh?”

Harry smiled at him though his stomach was doing flips, “Yeah, guess so.”

“Well you seem fun enough,” Louis bumped his hip with an enticing grin.

The Rec Room was surprisingly empty when they got there. Matty and George were playing cards at a table by the door but other than that the room was empty.

“I thought it was usually busy in here?” Louis asked as he and Harry walked over to the couch in front of the TV. Harry tried to turn it on with the remote but it didn’t have batteries so we had to go through the channels manually.

“Well it usually is but I guess everyone was really excited about mini golf,” Harry whipped his finger around in the air to mock excitement which made Louis giggle as he relaxed into the couch.

Harry passed Austin Powers on MTV and got to the 40 Year Old Virgin on HBO before he switched back to MTV. “Austin Powers or Steve Carell?” He asked Louis.

Louis shrugged, “I think Austin Powers started like a half hour ago if Beyoncé is already on screen. The 40 Year Old Virgin is just starting.”

Harry put the TV back on HBO before he finally backed away from it and stood over the couch.

“You can have a seat,” Louis laughed as he made room for Harry to sit down beside him.

 

Harry was surprised that they were so comfortable watching such a suggestive movie together- and in such a close proximity to each other at that- but it felt just like watching Netfix on his laptop with Niall in his lap and Zayn at his side doodling and not paying attention. Part of Harry felt guilty for feeling so comfortable with Louis so quickly, for wanting to pull Louis into his lap like he would do with Niall and for wanting to kiss his lips every time he laughed. They brushed hands a couple of time which made Harry’s breath catch in his throat and his skin burn even though the room was so cold since it was so empty. It took all of Harry’s strength and willpower not to hold onto Louis’s hand and latch his lips onto his neck.

 

When the movie was finally over, Louis stretched his arms over his head and yawned as he ruffled Harry’s curls like it was something routine to do, like he’d done it a thousand times before. Harry bit his lip and willed himself not to keen into Louis’s touch.

“Time for bed then I suppose,” Louis asked with another yawn and Harry didn’t think it was possible for him to be any more adorable.

“Yeah,” Harry smiled at him fondly, “Bed time.”

“Want to walk me back to my room?” Louis suggested as he stood and reached out his hand to help pull Harry up. Harry took it and made to let go when he was on his feet but Louis held on. He held on until they’d made it back to his dorm in A-Hall after a slow walk in a comfortable silence.

“Well this is me,” Louis said quietly when they’d gotten to his door.

“This is you,” Harry whispered.

“Thanks for not ditching me,” Louis smiled and squeezed Harry’s hand once before he finally let go to unlock his door.

“I could never,” Harry told him as Louis opened the door.

Louis smiled at him again as he turned around and pressed a soft kiss to Harry’s cheek the way that Harry had done to him earlier but this felt different. Louis’s kiss felt sweet and innocent where Harry’s was meant to be teasing and naughty.  Harry’s skin burned under Louis’s lips and that heat stayed there even after Louis had pulled away and stepped into his room.

“Goodnight Harry,” Louis told him from inside the room to where Harry was still standing in a daze outside of his door.

“Goodnight Louis,” Harry barely managed to get out before Louis was giggling and shutting the door.

Harry’s head was spinning a million miles an hour as he walked back to D-Hall and even after he’d pressed himself back against his and Niall’s bedroom door his head was still reeling.

“You ok?” He heard Zayn ask him in the darkness.

“Yeah,” Harry swallowed and nodded as he walked over to their bed and got in beside Zayn, “Is Niall asleep?”

Zayn nodded as he gave Harry a kiss. Harry melted into the familiarity, the one he was allowed to feel, the one he was _supposed_ to feel. “He’s been out for a little while now,” Zayn said quietly, rubbing his hand up Niall’s softly rising and falling back.

 Harry peeked over Zayn’s shoulder to look for himself at how tiny and innocent Niall looked when he was asleep before he pressed a kiss to Zayn’s skin and laid down. “Thank you for staying tonight,” he spoke softly in the darkness.

“He can’t lose us both at the same time,” Zayn murmured.

Harry’s brows furrowed, “And what does that mean?”

“The way you look at Louis, your zeal to be around him, and to not disappoint him- does it remind you of anything? Another time maybe” Zayn had a way of speaking to them like he was an old soul sometimes, like he was trying to help guide Niall and him down the right paths in their lives that he’d been down before. Harry appreciated it most of the time, but times like this when he knew Zayn was insinuating something and not just saying it directly bothered him. He chose not to answer.

“It’s the way you were with us a couple years ago,” Zayn told him after a while when Harry still hadn’t spoken.

“Things haven’t changed,” Harry said quietly after a few beats of silence.

“Not yet,” Zayn said. The ‘ _but they will’_ fell unspoken in the darkness between them but Zayn might as well have said it because Harry still felt the weight of guilt on his chest as if he had.

“They won’t,” Harry tried to tell him. He wasn’t sure if it was meant to convince Zayn or himself. Maybe it was for the both of them.

“Harry, babe, it’s ok,” Zayn assured him as he reached a hand behind him to squeeze Harry’s hip, “We’re here because we want to be. You can walk away anytime you want to.”

“Is that why you’re leaving us for Perrie?” Harry asked him quietly. He could feel the way that Zayn was probably setting his jaw right about then even though his back was to Harry.

“I see Perrie because I want to. But I’m here because I want to be here. I know what I’m doing and I’m honest with myself and the both of you about it. That’s what’s important,” Zayn told him. Harry let out a light sigh. “Don’t think either of us have forgotten about that bite on your hip, Haz. We know it didn’t come from us. You can see other people; that’s fine. But don’t lie to us again.”

“I’m sorry,” Harry apologized and shifted around under the sheets uncomfortably.

“Calm down,” Zayn pressed his hand on Harry’s hip to settle him, “We’re not angry. Or _I’m_ not at least. I’m just letting you know.”

“Ok,” Harry breathed and Zayn turned his head to give him another kiss so that he’d know for sure that Zayn wasn’t mad.

“Goodnight Harry,” Zayn whispered as his hand found its way into Harry’s grasp and Harry pressed himself closer to Zayn’s side.

“Goodnight Zayn,” Harry whispered back before he fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I always say my fics are like little TV episodes/movies so think of this as the pilot. If you guys like it, I'll keep it going. If it flops, I'll scrap it but let me know what you think!


	2. Chapter 2

Zayn woke up unusually early the next morning. He was wedged in between Niall and Harry; Harry curled around his back and Niall under his arms in front of him. He debated on whether or not he should go back to sleep, usually he would have, but he needed to wee and they were to due to get up in a half hour anyways according to the clock on Harry’s nightstand.

He shimmied his way from the sandwich, trying his best to not stir the other two too much. Niall simply rolled over onto his back unaffected but Zayn could see the way that Harry’s face was contorting with confusion even though his eyes were still closed. Not only was Harry a light sleeper but he also always had to be touching someone or something while he slept or else he’d wake up just as he was at the moment. He peeped an eye open to see which one of them had gotten up and then peered over to where Zayn was watching him while he quietly put on his clothes from the day before.

“What are you doing?” Harry asked him as he propped himself up on his elbows and returned Zayn’s stare.

“Need a wee,” Zayn told him.

“Are you coming back?” Harry asked.

“Need a smoke and shower too so probably not,” Zayn shrugged and pulled on the backs of his black Air Max 90’s. Harry pouted at him disappointedly but Zayn came over to ruffle his curls and give him a peck.

“You could’ve waited, you know,” Harry frowned and then glanced at the clock, “We’ve still got loads of time. We could’ve all just gone together.”

“I told you I need to piss too,” Zayn said but Harry’s frown deepened, “What?”

“Nothing,” Harry shook his head and pulled Niall’s still sleeping body into his arms, “Enjoy your piss.”

“What, Harry?” Zayn asked starting to get annoyed.

“Just go,” Harry laid back down and pressed his face into the skin of Niall’s shoulder. Zayn let out a hard sigh and waited a moment longer before he gave up and walked out of the door.

 

Zayn was surprised to find that Liam was already awake and gone by the time that he’d peed and gone back to his room in B-Hall. He considered taking a short nap before he got ready but decided on going out for a smoke instead. Just as he was pulling out his lighter, Liam barged into the room and startled at the sudden sight of Zayn standing there since the room had been empty when he’d left. Zayn’s eyes glimmered over the sheen of sweat glistening on Liam’s skin and the way that his tank top was clinging to the wetness over his abs. He’d definitely made the right choice by staying awake.

“Um, sorry,” Liam stuttered as he walked further into the room, shutting the door behind him and going to his side of the room to start getting his clothes and toiletries together, “I didn’t know you’d be in here. Sorry if I like, smell or something.”

Zayn laughed at him fondly and moved to sit back on his bed. His cigarette could wait, the sight of a shiny, sweaty Liam probably couldn’t. “It’s fine, Liam. This is your room too now.” Liam just gave him an awkward, one sided smile in response. “Do mind my asking why you’re all wet? And like, why you’re up this early?”

Liam let out a little breath and a genuine smile at the questions, “I kind of have like … a thing. I like to workout-“

“I can see that,” Zayn smirked and licked his lips. Forward as it may have been, it still made Liam blush and brush a palm over his inner thigh.

“I um- I like morning workouts while the sun is rising and the day hasn’t started yet. It’s like peaceful, you know and it gives me time to like think and stuff. I don’t know, it’s stupid. I-“ Liam rambled and started to just grapple all of his things into his hands but Zayn let out a comforting giggle.

“It’s not stupid, Liam. I think that’s great. I feel the same way about my art, granted I don’t do it at arse o’clock in the morning but I get it,” Zayn nodded and smiled at him, getting Liam to smile back at him in return.

“I um set alarms on my phone too,” Liam rubbed his neck in embarrassment, “I can make them quieter so they won’t wake you up if you want me too.”

“That’s ok. I don’t really sleep in here too much anyways to be honest,” Zayn told him. He could see the way Liam deflated at that.

“Did you guys have fun last night?” Liam asked him as he put his stuff down to start fiddling with his book bag and give himself an excuse to stay in the room.

Zayn laughed again, “Bit forward innit?”

Liam’s face flushed in realization, “God no, I meant in the Rec Room! Not- . I meant in the Rec Room.”

“It’s fine,” Zayn chuckled, “But Niall and I stayed in their room while Harry went. You didn’t go?”

“No, I was here talking to a friend,” Liam told him.

“So it was just Harry and Louis then,” Zayn said out loud more as confirmation for himself rather than as a question to Liam. That sneaky little shit. How was he going to try to make Zayn feel bad for sneaking around when he’d blatantly omitted the fact that he’d gone on a date alone with Louis the night before.

“Are you ok?” Liam asked, pulling him from the wreckage of his train of thought.

“Yeah, yeah. I’m good. Just need a smoke,” Zayn answered and tapped at the cigarette pinned under his ear, “You want to come?”

“I don’t smoke,” Liam told him.

“I know,” Zayn chuckled and hopped up from his bed, “But you could like keep me company.”

“Do you want me too?” Liam asked.

“I don’t invite just anyone to sit outside and watch the sunrise while I smoke, Liam,” Zayn told him and hooked an arm around his neck.

“So I’m the chosen one?” Liam joked.

“I suppose so,” Zayn laughed and led them down the hall to an exit. The door led to the outside patio that had a few wooden recliners lining the stone detail of the wall that had a beautiful view of the sunrise behind the mountains and the lake. It kind of made Zayn wish he’d wake up earlier more often so that he could enjoy it.

Zayn lit his cigarette and offered it over to Liam after a few drags but he declined and Zayn shrugged.

“Are you allowed to do this?” Liam asked.

“No,” Zayn shrugged again, “But I do it anyways.”

Liam nodded and went quiet for a bit before he spoke again, “Why are _you_ up so early? You asked me but I never got to ask you.”

Zayn glanced at him and then at the lake, “Dunno. I was supposed to be showering but then I ran into you and I also wanted a cigarette.” Liam just looked at him and nodded before Zayn looked back at him and he looked away.

“Anything else you’d like to ask?” Zayn teased him and took another puff from his cigarette. Liam shook his head and continued to stare at the sparkling water. “Oh come on, there must be something.”

“Nothing,” Liam glanced at him and then back at the sky and water.

“Well can I ask you something then?” Zayn asked and ashed his cigarette as he turned to look at Liam with his arms slung lazily over his knees.

“Yeah?” Liam asked him back quietly.

“Are you single?” Zayn smirked at him.

“Why?” Liam blushed and turned away again.

“No reason, just curious. My plate’s a bit full at the mo’ if you couldn’t already tell,” Zayn joked.

“I uh-, yeah I mean I suppose so, I guess,” Liam stammered, “I think I am.”

“You think you are?” Zayn laughed, “How wouldn’t you know.”

“Well the person I was talking to last night, we’re talking kind of, I guess,” Liam stumbled and rubbed his neck, “But we’re not really together, technically, I suppose; I don’t know.”

“Girl?” Zayn inquired.

Liam blushed and nodded, “Yeah. I’m not-“

“Got it,” Zayn simpered and cut him off.

“Not that there’s anything wrong with- you know. I’m just- I’ve never-“

“It’s _okay_ , Liam,” Zayn smiled at him cordially and leaned over to shake his shoulder.

“I’m not like homophobic or anything though,” Liam added for safe measure “I just- that’s more of Louis’s thing.”

“Ok, Liam,” Zayn laughed, “Tell me about your sort-of-kinda-not-really girl friend.”

Liam let out a nervous breath and glanced back over at the lake, “Well her name is Sophia. She’s um really beautiful and kind. She’s basically the only part of my old life that hasn’t changed, I guess,” Liam swallowed and Zayn looked at him.

“And by old life you mean?” Zayn asked.

“The life I had before my dad married Louis’s mum,” Liam explained. “Don’t get me wrong, he’s great, I love him. Everyone does. Even my dad seems to love him more than me- and wow I’m saying too much,” Liam’s face flushed again with embarrassment.

“It’s fine. I get it,” Zayn shrugged and flicked the ashes off his cigarette.

“Your parents got divorced too?” Liam asked.

“No, but Harry’s parents did our freshman year and that was pretty hard for him so like I’ve seen how it can affect someone,” Zayn told him.

“It’s just,” Liam started and watched as Zayn stubbed out his cigarette and came to sit beside him on his recliner, “Everything in my life has been changing so much lately. As soon as I think I’ve got a grip, I’m losing it again. I just need,” Liam let out a sigh and looked down as he shook his head.

“Stability?” Zayn supplied and tested the waters by rubbing a finger on Liam’s elbow. Liam watched him but he didn’t look uncomfortable or make him stop.

“Yeah,” Liam breathed, still watching Zayn trace his finger over his skin.

“We all do,” Zayn told him equally as quiet. He looked up at Liam’s face, taking in the worry and frown that seemed to be aging the boy far beyond his years. Liam looked back up at him and Zayn glanced at his lips before he glanced back up at his eyes. Liam reciprocated the glance but neither of them made a move, Zayn’s thumb just stilled on Liam’s elbow for a fraction of a second while they looked at each other.

Liam opened his mouth but Zayn was the first one to speak. “I’m gonna go shower,” he whispered and he didn’t mean for it to come out as an invitation but it ended up sounding like one anyways.

“I- um me too,” Liam whispered back and then blushed again, “Not like with you but separately like my own-“

“I know, Liam,” Zayn let out a soft chuckle and squeezed his elbow before he finally got up from the seat. “You coming back in or what?” He asked when Liam still hadn’t gotten up.

“I’m gonna stay out here for a minute,” Liam told him and then looked back at the lake, “It’s nice out. I’ll see you at breakfast?”

Zayn nodded and left to go back into the building.

 

+++

“Morning,” Niall smiled up at Zayn brightly when Zayn had walked up to have a seat at the table. Zayn brushed his hair back and gave him a quick kiss on the forehead before he sat down. Niall and Harry both let out sighs.

“What is it now?” Zayn asked as he took a bite of his eggs.

“We missed you this morning,” Niall pouted.

“I’m sorry,” Zayn apologized and put his hand under the table to squeeze Niall’s knee.

“Are you coming tonight?” Niall asked as he took a bite of his sausage.

Zayn chanced a glance at Harry’s disappointed face before he looked back at Niall, “I’m not sure.”

Niall deflated at that and looked at Harry to say something but Harry just frowned between the two of them. Thankfully, Louis came to the table with Liam in tow.

“Morning everyone,” He chirped before he took in everyone’s solemn expressions, “Not morning people? Heard.”

“Just a bit tired,” Harry lied on their behalf and smiled at Louis. Louis smiled back at him while Niall glanced at the exchange, watching them carefully and Zayn glanced over at Liam and then back at Harry.

“Did you sleep alright?” Harry asked Louis politely and Louis smiled at him again.

“I did actually. The beds are surprisingly comfortable. It’s kind of weird sleeping alone though since I’ve been sharing with Liam for months now,” Louis shrugged and hooked an arm around Liam’s shoulders. Zayn glanced at them again and caught the way Liam had been looking at him.

“Well you could share again if you wanted,” Zayn told him and Liam frowned, “Not that Liam’s not great to share with! I’m just not in the room much so you could take my bunk and I could have your single.”

Louis laughed, “I love him but not that much.”

+++

“So when were you going to mention it was just you and Louis last night?” Zayn asked Harry casually when they were finally alone in Art. He smirked to himself at the way Harry’s hand had immediately stilled and his entire face and neck flushed red.

“How did you know?” Harry asked as he tried to go back to painting his portrait.

“Answer my question and I’ll answer yours,” Zayn ordered.

“It just happened,” Harry insisted, “I didn’t think it was a big deal.” Zayn peered from around his canvas to look at Harry with a frown that said _‘I’m not buying your shit’_. “I went to get Liam but he was busy.”

“Mhm,” Zayn hummed in his throat, “What did you guys do?”

“We just watched a movie,” Harry muttered.

“Are you sure?” Zayn tested him and looked at him again.

“Yes,” Harry said defensively.

“Ok,” Zayn nodded.

“Why are you interrogating me?” Harry frowned.

“I’m not,” Zayn shrugged, “I just asked you a question.”

“Well it feels like you are.”

“It probably does if you’re hiding something,” Zayn said offhandedly.

“ _I’m not_ ,” Harry pled.

“If you say so,” Zayn painted one of Harry’s eyelashes.

“I promise that’s all we did,” Harry assured him.

“So nothing else happened?” Zayn asked.

“No,” Harry persisted, “We watched a movie, I walked him back to his room, and then I came to bed.”

“Nothing happened at his room?” Zayn pressed.

“No,” Harry looked away.

“Harry,” Zayn grumbled, “What did we talk about?”

“You know, I don’t see why I have to explain this to you when you go out and do worse stuff with Perrie all the time,” Harry argued.

“Don’t deflect the subject. We’re not talking about me and Perrie; we’re talking about you.”

“Well I don’t want to talk about this anymore,” Harry shook his head.

“Fine, you want to talk about who you slept with a couple days ago, then?” Zayn pushed.

“Stop it, Zayn,” Harry warned him.

“Why are you getting mad?” Zayn asked, watching as Harry gathered up his supplies to move, “Sit back down.”

“No. You’re pissing me off. I told you I don’t want to talk about it but you keep asking me shit anyways. It’s bullshit and you fucking know it,” Harry snapped.

“Harry,” Zayn called after him and circled his wrist in his hand. Harry looked down and tried to tear it away but Zayn just held on tighter. He put his other hand on Harry’s waist and pulled him closer to stand between his thighs. Harry frowned down at him but Zayn dragged his thumbs over the skin under the waistband of Harry’s briefs and pressed a quick kiss to his collar as a silent apology to calm him down.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have pushed you like that,” Zayn apologized as Harry sighed and sat back down on his stool.

“You shouldn’t have,” Harry agreed.

 “I’m just worried about you, Haz,” Zayn admitted.

“For what?” Harry asked exasperatedly.

“We don’t have to talk about it right now, it can wait. But I think you know it’s a conversation we have to have at some point. Probably all three of us,” Zayn said. Harry sighed again. “Did you really want to know about what I do with Perrie?” He inquired and Harry shrugged. “Well we drink sometimes or we’ll smoke. And we do artsy stuff like draw each other, sometimes on each other. We talk sometimes but we mostly just kiss and fuck as you can imagine.”

“I’d rather not,” Harry snorted.

“It’s not pulling teeth to get me to talk about what I do with her, Harry. If you guys want to know something all you have to do is ask,” Zayn shrugged.

“Are you going to go see her tonight?” Harry inquired.

“Probably not but I’m gonna visit her tomorrow,” Zayn informed him.

“So you’re coming to bed tonight then or-“ Harry cut himself off.

“Of course I’m coming to bed,” Zayn furrowed his brows, “Where else would I go?”

“Wherever you snuck off to this morning,” Harry muttered.

Zayn rolled his eyes, “You really want to start that up again?”

“Would you rather all three of us sat down and had this conversation?” Harry looked around from his painting at Zayn.

“I went to do exactly what I told you I was going to do,” Zayn said.

“Well why were you late to breakfast then?”

“I wasn’t late. You guys were just early.”

“Is that so,” Harry snorted.

“I went to have a wee and ran into Liam in the room. I invited him out to the deck to chill while I smoked a cig, we talked, I showered then I came to breakfast,” Zayn explained. Harry hummed in his throat. “What?”

“You seem to have taken quite the liking to Liam haven’t you?” Harry teased.

“Could say the same about you and Louis,” Zayn said flippantly.

“But we’re not talking about me and Louis, are we?” Harry mocked Zayn’s words to him from earlier, “You must be so chuffed you get to share a room with him.”

“I’m never there much anyways since I spend all my time with you and Niall,” Zayn shrugged.

“For now,” Harry commented offhandedly.

Zayn rolled his eyes, “Whatever. He’s a nice kid, not too hard on the eyes either but he’s straight and apparently he has a girlfriend back home anyways.”

“If it’s who I think it is, she’s pretty hot too,” Harry said.

“You saw her?” Zayn paused and looked at him.

“Last night when I went to get him. He was Facetiming her.”

“What does she look like?” Zayn inquired.

“Why do you care?” Harry retorted.

“I don’t,” Zayn shrugged and tried to focus his attention back on coloring Harry’s eyes but it was too late.

“Yeah you do,” Harry teased, “You like him.”

“Shut up,” Zayn flicked some of his green paint at him.

Harry’s jaw dropped, “Fuck, you really _do_ like him!”

“Stop!” Zayn flicked more paint at him to try and get Harry to shut his mouth.

“Oh this is fucking rich,” Harry laughed to himself, “I get interrogated for having an innocent crush while you’re actually _living_ with the guy you want to fuck.”

“So you’re admitting you like Louis, then?” Zayn taunted him back.

“Again, we’re talking about you right now. Didn’t you walk him to your room yesterday, too? And you took him out to watch the sunrise over the lake this morning? How hard do you plan on working for this fuck exactly?” Harry joked.

“It’s not like that,” Zayn replied quickly.

“Oh it’s not?” Harry retorted, “What is it like then?”

“Not like that. He’s nice and he’s nice to talk to but I already told you he’s straight.”

“So?” Harry laughed, “That didn’t stop us.”

“Please Harry, you’re the farthest thing from straight,” Zayn rolled his eyes.

“Oh whatever. Just because I don’t like playing soccer or video games doesn’t automatically tip me off.”

“No but your fascination with phallic shaped objects does,” Zayn snorted and mimicked the way Harry ate his bananas like he was about to suck a dick which made Harry be the one to flick paint this time.

 

+++

“Pez, where are you?” Zayn whisper-called the next night when he was looking for Perrie in the woods behind Canterbury Cross.

“I’m here, I’m here,” Perrie waved her hand from where she was resting on top of a rock before she got up to walk over to him.

“Hi,” he smiled at her before he hauled Perrie into his arms. She automatically wrapped her legs around his waist and cupped his cheeks in her hands before she leaned down to press a firm kiss to his lips.

“ ‘ave you got everythin?” She asked as he set her back down on her feet and she grabbed his hand to lead him to sit on the rocks. He shook the basket he was carrying at her and she smiled in response.

Zayn set down the blanket first before he pulled out the prerolled joint and lighter and then dumped the rest of the contents of the basket out. He’d brought a few condoms and sandwiches from the drugstore down the road and some paint upon Perrie’s request. Zayn chivalrously passed Perrie the joint and lighter and let her take the first few hits before she passed it back to him.

“Did ya miss me?” Zayn asked her daringly has he blew out a stream of smoke and passed the joint back over to her.

“No,” she exhaled before she took another hit and then passed the joint back over to Zayn, “I’ve been keeping good enough company without you.”

“With who?” Zayn asked her seriously and she laughed.

“Well wouldn’t you like to know?” She giggled and took the joint back.

“Yeah I would actually,” he leaned back on his elbows and Perrie crawled over to lay in his lap before she shotgunned her smoke into his mouth.

“Doesn’t matter,” she whispered with a smirk, their lips mere inches apart. Zayn glanced down at her full quirked lips before he looked back up into her piercing blue eyes and kissed her. They undressed each other as they kissed and Zayn gently got Perrie onto her back ontop of the blanket on the grass.

“The paint,” Perrie reminded him when he’d been rutting up between her thighs as he kissed her neck.

“What do you want me to do with it?” He asked her.

“Put it on me,” she instructed.

“Where?”

“Everywhere,” she smirked. Zayn smiled as he uncapped the blue paint and rubbed it between his palms. He left two handprints on her chest and then on her stomach and thighs as he kissed his way down until he had his head between her legs. He added a squeeze of purple and left a set of prints on her breasts and her bum when he put his hands under her to lift her legs up as he put his tongue to her clit and started to eat her out. Zayn had her squirming and arching onto the warmth of his tongue as quickly as he’d started and let her run her hands through his hair even though she’d stained them yellow.

He eventually pulled away to move up and kiss her again as he gave his cock a few pumps and rolled on a condom. Perrie squeezed a bit of green onto Zayn’s chest and rubbed it in as she pressed him to lie down and mounted his cock. She let out a soft moan as she sank down ontop of him until she was down at the base and resting on her knees on either side of his hips with Zayn laying beneath her, leaving pink hand prints where his hands covered her hips and bum.

 

By the time they were done, they were both covered from head to toe in paint and they laughed once they got a good look at each other.

“How the hell are we gonna explain this?” Zayn asked in a laugh.

“I have no fucking clue!” Perrie giggled and kissed him as he pulled her into a cuddle. “I wish we could shower together, though,” she frowned, “The colors are going to look so cool going down the drain.”

“Well I could try to sneak you into Calvary,” Zayn suggested.

“Really?” Perrie’s smile brightened and Zayn couldn’t help but lean in to kiss her again.

“I mean we could try. I think it’d be more obvious if there were boy’s feet in a girl’s shower than vice versa,” Zayn commented.

“Yeah,” Perrie nodded.

“Do you want to sleep over too?” Zayn asked, “We’d have to wake up a little early so I could walk you back on time but I think it’d be cool.”

“Are you sure?” Perrie asked.

“Yeah,” Zayn smiled and she reciprocated it.

“Have you still got the room to yourself?” She asked and raised her brows suggestively.

“No actually. Not anymore as of yesterday,” Zayn frowned even though he didn’t mind in the least. He was actually a bit eager to see how Liam would react to him bringing Perrie back.

Perrie mimicked his pout but he kissed it off of her face as he led her back to the school.

 

By the time they’d gotten back to Calvary Creek it had been lights out long enough that the halls and bathrooms would be clear for Zayn to sneak Perrie into his room and then back to the bathroom. He took her down to his room and knocked to let Liam know he was back before he opened the door and pulled Perrie inside.

“Hi Zayn,” Liam called to him from where  was sitting at his deck with his head down in his math textbook.

“Hi Liam,” Zayn laughed and Liam turned around to look at him.

“Oh my gosh, what happened to you?” Liam looked between the two of them with horror. They laughed but Liam continued to look at them (particularly Perrie) with terror.

“Paint war,” Zayn informed him as he moved from the doorway to grab some clothes for them to change into after their shower, “This is Perrie by the way. Pez, this is Liam; my new roommate.”

“Nice to meet you,” Perrie smiled and waved at him. Liam tried to smile and wave back but it was obviously forced.

“It’s ok if Perrie sleeps here tonight, right?” Zayn asked. Liam opened his mouth to say something but he closed it and just frowned at Zayn with a worried expression instead. “I promise we won’t mess around or anything, if you’re worried about that.”

“Well there was that,” Liam said, “But also will we like get in trouble for having a girl here?”

Zayn shrugged, “No. It’s not like they do room checks here. And we’ll be out of here early so I can get her back to her school.”

“Ok,” Liam said quietly though he was still frowning.

Zayn let out a soft laugh as he walked over to rub Liam’s hair. “We’ll be fine, Liam,” Zayn assured him before he grabbed Perrie’s hand to lead her to the bathroom.

 

Liam was asleep by the time that Zayn and Perrie returned, now paint free and both in Zayn’s clothes. Zayn pulled Perrie to lie in bed with him, wrapping his arms around her to hold her close and she fell asleep shortly after though he stayed up a bit longer thinking about things.

He thought he’d feel satisfied with trying to make Liam jealous but he honestly felt kind of shit for having Perrie here. Liam was visibly uncomfortable with the situation for one, but there was also the fact that Harry and Niall were under the same roof, pissed at him for not being with them and then he’d had the nerve to bring her back to his room. Yeah, he definitely felt like shit and no amount of paint in his hair or sex could get rid of that feeling.

Zayn made sure Perrie was asleep for sure before he disentangled himself from around her, took his pack of cigs and walked outside to the deck to smoke in the cool air of the fall night.

He’d just gotten through his first smoke and rested his head back against the wood of the recliner, letting his eyes slip closed as he breathed in the crisp air when he heard approaching footsteps followed by a soft ‘hey’ in his direction.

“Liam?” Zayn asked as the figure approached. Liam nodded and then glanced at the recliner across from the one Zayn was sitting on before Zayn nodded back and Liam sat down. “What are you doing out here?”

“I could ask you the same thing,” Liam responded, his gaze on the reflection of the moon on the sparking lake.

“Needed a smoke,” Zayn waved the pack, “I thought you were asleep.” Liam shook his head. “Are you ok? Did we bother you?”

“No, it’s fine. I just wasn’t expecting you to come back or you know, bring a girl home.”

“As opposed to-?” Zayn asked.

“I didn’t mean it like that. She’s very pretty and you look good together, no I just meant-“ Liam stammered and Zayn laughed at him.

“It’s fine, Liam. I don’t have to bring her here again if it makes you uncomfortable,” Zayn told him.

“No, Zayn, really it’s ok. It’s your room, you can do whatever you want,” Liam assured him.

“It’s _our_ room,” Zayn corrected, “And I don’t want to do anything that makes you uncomfortable. I don’t want you to think I’m _that_ guy.”

“And what guy is that?” Liam inquired.

“The guy that does whatever he wants with reckless abandon and doesn’t consider other people,” Zayn explained, shifting his gaze from Liam because he knew deep down that he was already starting to turn into exactly that whether he’d mean to or not.

“I don’t think you’re that guy,” Liam told him quietly. Zayn swallowed, still looking at his hands in his lap. “Are you cold?”

“What?”

“I said ‘are you cold’. You must be,” Liam chanced a glance down Zayn’s torso. Zayn had been too distracted before but now that Liam had mentioned it, he was freezing. Liam was clad in sweatpants and a hoodie while Zayn was practically naked in comparison in just his tshirt and boxers.

“Well now that you’ve pointed it out I am,” Zayn rubbed up his arms and Liam took his top off to hand it to him. “You don’t have to-“

“Put it on,” Liam instructed him and Zayn thankfully slipped the warm jacket over his head. It was soft and it smelled just like Liam.

“Won’t you be cold though?” Zayn asked though he didn’t want to give it back.

Liam shrugged, “I have more and I didn’t plan on staying out here. You probably wanted to be alone anyways.”

Zayn _had_ wanted to be alone to think actually but now that Liam was out here he wanted him to stay. But what was he supposed to say? _‘I know I’ve got a girl waiting for me in my bed and two boys also waiting for me in their bed and it’s the middle of the night and we’ve only known each other for a few days, but would you sit outside in the freezing cold while I’ve got your jacket on anyways?’_ Zayn thought better of it. “I mean you could stay if you wanted,” at least that way it was Liam’s decision and not Zayn’s.

“Do you want me to?” Liam asked.

“If you want,” Zayn answered and made room for Liam on his recliner.

“Do you want me to sit _there_?” Liam glanced at the space Zayn had made beside him.

“I mean you don’t have to. I just thought you’d get cold since you don’t have a shirt on,” Zayn’s gaze slowly drifted down Liam’s biceps and torso. There was no way Liam hadn’t caught him but he didn’t call Zayn out on it. Liam gulped but he got up and sat down beside where Zayn was lying down on the seat. “You can lie down too, if you’d like.”

Liam swallowed again and lay down beside Zayn. “Relax, Liam. It’s ok,” Zayn said softly, feeling Liam’s tension radiating in the air.

“I just- haven’t done this before,” Liam mumbled.

“Done what?” Zayn asked him gently, “Spooned?”

“Well we’re not spooning, is that what we were going to do?” Liam asked, a bit of fear in his voice.

“Only if you want to,” Zayn whispered, “You don’t have a shirt on and I don’t have pants on. You can be the big spoon if you want.”

“Zayn I-“ Liam started.

“Only if you want to,” Zayn repeated, “I don’t want you to do anything you’re not comfortable with.” Liam let out a little breath and frowned. “Only if you want to,” Zayn repeated.

“I could just get us a blanket,” Liam suggested and Zayn frowned.

“We might as well just go inside then,” Zayn responded.

“No,” Liam said, “It’s nice out here. I haven’t seen the view at night. It’s even prettier than it is in the day. I’d like to stay out here. I just think a blanket would be more efficient than spooning.”

“So you’re saying you’re going to go all the way back to the room just to bring a blanket out?” Zayn asked incredulously.

“I could.”

“Liam,” Zayn sighed and rolled his eyes.

“Or did you really just want me to hold you?” Liam joked.

“Excuse me?” Zayn scoffed and Liam wrapped his arms and legs around Zayn facetiously. Though Liam had meant it as a joke, Zayn still appreciated his warmth and closeness as if he’d been serious. Zayn didn’t say anything after that and Liam just held him in silence as he let his mind relax and his eyes rest again. He didn’t fall asleep, he just laid still in Liam’s arms breathing him in and praying that the moment would never end … until it did.

“How do you do it?” Liam asked him, almost inaudibly, minutes later when Zayn had nearly fallen asleep.

“You’re doing it right,” Zayn told him, thinking Liam was asking about cuddling techniques.

“No not this,” Liam let out a little chuckle, “I mean like how do you have such an effect on people?”

“What do you mean?” Zayn turned his head to look at Liam. Liam looked down and unconsciously tightened his arms around Zayn.

“You’ve got everyone around you wrapped around your finger,” Liam told him.

Zayn scoffed, “I do not.”

“Yeah you do. You’ve got your girlfriend sleeping in your bed, you’ve got two boyfriends who are going to welcome you with open arms tomorrow like nothing happened tonight, I’m sure, and then you’ve got me freezing to death because you wanted me to hold you,” Liam explained and Zayn laughed.

“Niall and Harry aren’t my ‘boyfriends’ and Perrie isn’t my girlfriend.”

“Then what are they to you then?” Liam asked.

“I explained this to you before,” Zayn stated simply, “They’re people that I spend time with because I want to. But I don’t have any binds or obligations.” Zayn didn’t like the way Liam looked at him after he said that and he could feel the tension between them again. “What?” Liam shook his head and if Zayn wasn’t mistaken, Liam looked like he might have actually been repulsed.

“I just don’t get that. How can you do these things with these people, knowing it’s obvious that they care about you and love you but still think that they’re disposable?” The hurt and disgust in Liam’s voice was strengthening and Zayn could tell that this was no longer just about him but he felt infinitely smaller and sick nonetheless.

“I didn’t say that they were ‘disposable’,” Zayn started carefully.

“You may as well have. How do you hold someone the way that I’m holding you right now and say that you don’t feel anything about it, Zayn? How can you take the vulnerability that they give you and not even think twice about it before you just move on to the next person?” Liam shook his head.

“Liam,” Zayn tried to calm him down but Liam was already letting Zayn go and getting up. “Liam, wait!” Zayn called to his back but Liam was already stomping back into the building.

By the time Zayn had processed through what had happened and went back to the room, Liam was already back in his bed, his back to Zayn’s side of the room. Zayn felt even more shit than before as he climbed into his bed beside Perrie, not wanting to touch her anymore but she naturally rolled back to curl up in his arms, leaving him with no other choice but to hold her.

 

+++

Zayn couldn’t deny that he was a bit disappointed when he woke up the next morning and Liam’s bed was empty. He knew Liam was probably out jogging and he had Perrie here but he was still kind of bothered by Liam’s absence anyways.

Zayn was thankful that Perrie didn’t really bother with trying to talk too much on the way back to her school. They’d exchanged muttered good morning’s and shared a couple of kisses but that was as far as their interactions that morning had gone apart from them holding hands as they walked along the path. When they arrived at Canterbury Cross, Perrie thanked him for the night and Zayn gave her one last kiss and the promise of a text before he left.

 

As he smoked a cigarette on his way back, Zayn couldn’t decide what to do when he got back. He didn’t know if he should wait in the room for Liam so they could talk about what had happened the night before or avoid him altogether. He thought about crawling into bed with Harry and Niall to surprise them and catch a quick nap before they all had to wake up but he wasn’t sure if he was ready to deal with the questions from them about his night with Perrie (and Liam related questions from Harry) yet either.

 Zayn just knew that he was screwed. He’d thought that he could handle this-- and that he was doing a pretty decent job at it as well-- until Liam had dragged the true shitiness of what he was doing into the light. It had been simple enough to convince himself that being with the boys and Perrie was just all in good fun, nothing serious, nothing to feel about, but to hear someone blatantly tell him that he was actually just stringing them all along and being an ass made him realize that he was the only one in the situation who had never truly cared or gotten invested into what they were all doing. He knew he should have realized it sooner but no one had called him out on it like Liam had. He just assumed that they were all ok with Zayn’s ways since they never said anything about it.

Ultimately Zayn decided to just try and avoid everyone for as long as he could. It was Saturday so he wouldn’t have the reprieve of classes (though he still would have been with all of the boys all day anyways but at least he’d have a reason not to talk). He took more time than usual walking back from Canterbury Cross and waited to sneak back into the room until he was sure Liam wouldn’t be there and then crawled under the covers to sleep.

He was woken up what felt like only minutes (when it had actually been an hour) later to the sound of a fierce pounding on his door. Zayn opened it to find an unhappy Niall waiting on his doorstep.

“Yes?” Zayn asked, rubbing at his eyes groggily and walking away from the door so that Niall could let himself in and shut it behind him.

“Why weren’t you at breakfast?” Niall crossed his arms and tapped his foot, watching as Zayn crawled back into the bed. Zayn stretched his arms out so that Niall could get in beside him but Niall was not having it.

“I was sleeping, I’m tired,” Zayn yawned and put his arms down, using them to cover himself with his duvet instead.

“Gee, I wonder why,” Niall muttered under his breath, though it was loud enough for Zayn to hear his displeasure.

“Can we not do this now?” Zayn asked, too tired for Niall to start in on his usual post-Perrie bullshit, “And where’s Harry?”

“With Liam and Louis. They want to do something today,” Niall sat down in Zayn’s chair and Zayn pulled him closer to the bed.

“Is this supposed to be a group activity as in they want all of us to come?” Zayn inquired and kept his face close to Niall’s.

Niall looked down, “That’d be nice yeah, seeing as how it’s they’re first weekend here and all.”

“Yeah, but I’m so tired,” Zayn pouted and pulled Niall even closer to the bed, “I’d rather just lie in bed all day; maybe with someone?”

Niall pouted back at him and Zayn leaned in for a kiss. Niall turned to give Zayn his cheek at the last second and Zayn frowned when he pulled away, “You don’t get to lie in bed with me all day after what you did last night.”

“Niall,” Zayn sighed exasperatedly and threw his arm over his face.

“I’m sorry but I’m not doing it this time, Zayn. I’m tired of you doing this.”

“Doing what?” Zayn rolled his eyes

“Leaving us for her and then coming back the next day acting like nothing happened!” Niall threw Zayn’s pillow at his face, “And don’t act like you don’t know what I’m talking about because I know you know you do it.”

 Zayn just let out an annoyed huff and rolled over but Niall hit him with the pillow again. “Would you fucking quit doing that!” Zayn shouted at him.

“Don’t turn away from me when I’m fucking talking to you then!” Niall yelled and was interrupted by a knock at the door. He threw Zayn’s pillow at him again before he got up to let Harry in.

“I had a feeling you’d either be fucking or fighting,” Zayn heard Harry say as he and Niall came back to his side of the room, “I heard yelling so I’m going to assume it’s the latter?”

“Tell him to stop being a twat!” Niall demanded and Zayn heard him pick up the pillow again but he caught Niall’s wrist in his hand before he could do anything.

“You throw that pillow at me again and I swear to God I will shove it so far down your throat, you’ll be shitting feathers for a month,” Zayn snarled.

“Would you two both fucking calm down,” Harry stepped between them to push them apart. “Why the hell are you two so angry?”

“Ask him,” Niall looked at Zayn like he was a wild an animal.

“I’m tired. I invited Niall to sleep with me, like literally, and he fucking hit me and now I want the both of you out. Go,” Zayn explained and rolled over so that his back was to them.

“Maybe we should just-“ Harry started but was cut off by Niall.

“Fuck you, Zayn. I mean it this time, I’m done. You’re a selfish piece of shit and you never deserved us anyways,” Niall spat and made to walk out of the door but Harry held him back by his arm.

“Fine,” was all Zayn muttered in response.

“No not fine,” Harry looked between the two of them like he was trying to figure out who the hell they were, “What the fuck is going on?”

“Let go of me,” Niall growled and tried to tear his arm from Harry’s grasp.

“Do something,” Harry pled to Zayn.

“What the hell am I supposed to do?” Zayn asked him.

“Apologize!” Harry shouted like it was the most obvious thing in the world because it was.

“For what?”

“And that’s exactly why I’m done,” Niall shook his head and slammed Zayn’s door shut behind him.

“You’re such a fucking piece of shit sometimes, Zayn,” Harry shook his head in disappointment before he followed Niall out of the door.

There were a lot of ways that Zayn could have handled the situation and slightly fewer, but still plenty of ways he _should_ have handled the situation but what Zayn chose was not one of them. If he had sense, he would have gotten out of bed and followed his boys out of the door. He would have apologized and pulled them both into an embrace and brought them back into the room for a cuddle and talk and everything would have been fine. Zayn knew that was all he had to do to fix the situation but he didn’t do it. Instead he curled up into a ball under his duvet and slept on and off for the rest of the day until he woke up to the sound of a dripping wet Liam, clad only in a too small towel around his waist, sifting through his drawers in search of clothes.

Zayn gladly would have pulled his comforter back over his face, acted like he’d never seen Liam and pretended he was still sleeping until he actually fell asleep again but it was too late. Liam had already glanced over and saw his peeking eyes and started talking to him.

“Hi,” he mumbled awkwardly as he pulled a shirt on over his head.

“Hi,” Zayn muttered back.

“I um, brought you some food. I figured you might be hungry,” Liam nodded his head towards where he’d left a sandwhich and juice on Zayn’s desk.

“Thanks,” Zayn bit his lip and sat up in his bed while he watched Liam pull on a pair of jeans.

“Did you have a good nap?” Liam asked as he crawled into his own bed across the room from Zayn’s.

Zayn shrugged half-heartedly, “It was ok, I guess. How was your first Saturday?”

Liam did a small smile to himself, “It was pretty fun. Uh, Niall, Harry, Louis, and I went kayaking  and tubing in the river. Niall was acting kind of weird but other than that it was really fun.”

“That’s good. I’m sorry about Niall but I’m glad you had a good time,” Zayn nodded and Liam studied his face.

“Is there something going on, Zayn?” Liam asked him carefully.

“What do you mean?” Zayn asked back.

“I don’t know,” Liam glanced away from Zayn’s gaze, “Things just seemed weird today is all. Like have you even left the room besides walking Perrie back to her school? Have you eaten anything?”

“I went to the vending machine and got myself some snacks, Liam. I ate, I’m fine. And I like to laze around in bed instead of going out sometimes, is that a crime?” Zayn snarked.

“No, I just mean like you didn’t come with us and Niall was in a bad mood. And I know I haven’t known you all for that long but he just doesn’t seem like the type to ever be in a bad mood,” Liam stated.

“Well I mean something did happen, but I’d rather not talk about it,” Zayn said awkwardly, “Especially because _we_ haven’t even talked it over yet. But the gist is that we got into an argument this morning.”

 “It wasn’t about like, what we did last night, was it?” Liam looked genuinely concerned.

“No,” Zayn shook his head, “It was about Perrie.”

“Oh, ok, good,” Liam let out a breath of relief, “Well not good but you know I’m glad they’re not upset about that part. I wanted to talk to you about that actually.”

“Oh God,” Zayn muttered and scrubbed his hands down his face.

“It’s nothing bad; I just wanted to apologize for my meltdown. I shouldn’t have said those things; I had no place,” Liam apologized and Zayn looked at him with genuine surprise.

“Liam you don’t have to-“

“No, Zayn really. Whether or not I agree with how you treat people, it’s none of my business. And I took out my own personal issues on you. It was wrong.”

“Liam,” Zayn breathed quietly.

“Can you at least tell me that you forgive me?” The way that Liam had his arms curled around his shins and his chin rested on his knee made him look so much smaller and vulnerable. Zayn couldn’t wrap his head around how the dripping wet body he’d licked his lips at with the thought of being under it had morphed into the despondent boy in front of him so quickly. He knew he hadn’t handled the Niall and Harry situation properly before and the way that he was about to handle this Liam situation probably wasn’t going to be right in regards to them but he got up and crossed the room to sit beside Liam on his bed, enveloping Liam in a hug that had him hooking his chin on Zayn’s shoulder and curling into his arms.

“Liam you don’t have anything to be sorry for,” Zayn told him when he’d pulled away, “You were right.” Liam shook his head but Zayn kept going anyways, “I’m not- good; I should be honest with them.”

“I never meant to ruin everything you had, Zayn,” Liam frowned at him.

“You didn’t. I did this to myself,” Zayn looked down, “All you did was point it out for me to see and force me to finally be honest with myself.”

“So what are you going to do?” Liam asked but Zayn wasn’t prepared.

He looked into Liam’s eyes with the same amount of vulnerability and lack of direction that Liam always looked at him with and shook his head, “I don’t know. But I guess I don’t really have the choice to not do anything anymore. I meant what I told you last night, about not wanting to be that guy.”

“I still don’t think you are, Zayn,” Liam looked down at Zayn’s hand like he wanted to hold it but he trailed his eyes back up to Zayn’s instead.

“Who do you think I am?” Zayn prompted him carefully and Liam looked at him in confusion.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean if you had to characterize me like a character in English, what would you say?” Zayn bumped his knee against Liam’s and reveled in the way it made Liam blush, knowing he was the cause.

“Well for starters I think you’re a massive flirt,” Liam let out a puff of breath and small smile and Zayn smiled back at him.

“What else?”

“I don’t know, what do you want me to say?” Liam asked, scooting a bit closer to Zayn as Zayn pulled his legs up from the floor to rest his back against the wall beside Liam’s bed and hold his knees to his chest the way Liam had been doing earlier.

“What you honestly think,” Zayn told him and Liam nodded carefully, like he was taking this task very seriously.

“Well I think you’re much more self-aware than you put off. I think you know when you’re in the middle of making a bad decision but you go through with it anyways because you’ve got too much pride to give in. But I don’t think you’re a bad person if that’s what you’re trying to get at,” Liam squeezed Zayn’s knee gently; “You aren’t a bad guy, Zayn. If you were, we probably wouldn’t be having this conversation.”

“Well it’s nice to know that you don’t think I’m Satan,” Zayn smiled and Liam laughed.

“Of course not, you’re too sweet to be the devil,” Liam grinned at him.

“Well that’s a new one,” Zayn snorted.

“What is?” Liam inquired.

“ ‘Sweet’ isn’t really an adjective people use to describe me,” Zayn shrugged.

“Well what do they usually say then?”

“ ‘Hot’, ‘sexy’,” Zayn smirked and Liam rolled his eyes, “ ‘cheeky’, ‘bastard’.”

“Those all sound pretty accurate but you can add sweet in there now too, I suppose,” Liam told him with a genuine smile.

“So you agree that I’m ‘hot and sexy’?” Zayn teased and he had to hold back his laugh at the way Liam’s cheeks immediately flushed red.

“No!” Liam argued immediately.

“So I’m ugly then?” Zayn pouted.

“No,” Liam said softly and then frowned at Zayn’s taunting him when Zayn finally cracked and started laughing, “Maybe you aren’t sweet after all.”

“Oh, Liam no,” Zayn tried to pout over his laugh as he leaned over closer to Liam to pull a face and make him laugh as well. He succeeded and they laughed together until it died down and they were just staring into each other’s eyes in a moment of silence.

Zayn figured he’d already made plenty of bad decisions so what was one more to add to the list? He leaned in and pressed his lips to Liam’s, freezing them together for a moment before Liam pulled away quickly and looked at Zayn with bewilderment.

“Zayn, I-,” Liam started and shook his head.

Zayn slunk back against the wall and raked a hand through his hair, “Sorry.”

“Zayn,” Liam repeated.

“I shouldn’t have done that,” Zayn pressed off of Liam’s bed and went to his dresser to throw on clothes so that he could get out of the room as quickly as possible.

“What, now you want to leave?” Liam asked and Zayn stilled after he’d pulled Harry’s jumper over his head, still without pants.

“I-“ Zayn started but Liam just looked at him with disappointment, stopping the words in his throat before they could come out.

Liam opened his mouth to say something but apparently his words were stuck in his throat too. Zayn pulled on pair of joggers and grabbed his cigarettes and the food Liam had brought him before he rushed out of the room.

 

Classic, now not only did Zayn have a Niall and Harry situation to deal with but he’d gone and gotten himself a Liam situation as well and he honestly wasn’t prepared to deal with either of them.

Zayn felt disoriented as he rushed out of the building and fumbled with his phone, tapping out an SOS to Harry for him to meet Zayn in the woods on the opposite side of the lake. He wasn’t confident that Harry would comply but even if he didn’t, Zayn needed a cigarette and he was afraid Liam would come out to the deck so he tried to get as far away as possible. He ran the risk of running into people on hikes, but he figured it was close enough to dinner that everyone should have been back already.

He was already halfway around the lake before Harry texted him back asking what he wanted.

**Z: I need to talk to you like now. Please *frown emoji***

**H: *side eye emojis* you know where my room is**

**Z: HARRY.**

**H: You were a twat today and it’s almost time for dinner. Niall will be mad. Couldn’t we just talk about it at dinner.**

**Z: no, Harry. I can’t go to dinner. I need to talk to you now.**

**H: Are you already in the woods?**

Zayn looked up from his phone to survey his surroundings. He’d been walking as he texted and was close enough to the trees that he wouldn’t technically be lying if he said yes.

**Z: Yeah**

**H: Well get out. I’m not coming outside but I’ll talk if you need to. Call me.**

Zayn followed instruction and Harry picked up on the third ring.

“Harry,” Zayn said urgently.

“Yes, Zayn?” Harry asked, traces of annoyance seeping into his tone.

“I did something bad,” Zayn bit his lip even though Harry couldn’t see him.

“I know you did,” Harry sighed, “Are you smoking again?”

Zayn tried to exhale away from the receiver and cleared his throat, “No.”

“You better be wearing your own clothes,” Harry warned him and Zayn pinched the fabric of Harry’s jumper between his fingers defiantly.

“I didn’t call you for you to lecture me on my smoking habits, Harry,” Zayn rolled his eyes.

“Well what did you call me to talk about then, Zayn? Is it about an apology perhaps?” And Zayn bit his lips again at Harry’s words because he knew that’s what this should have been about but it wasn’t because he was a bloody idiot.

“I kissed Liam,” Zayn said quietly but Harry’s reaction was anything but.

“You did _what_?” Harry retorted almost as quickly as Zayn had said it.

“I know it was a terrible, massively stupid, idiotic mistake but I don’t know what to do now,” Zayn paced around as he flicked the ashes from the end of his cigarette.

“Well when did this happen, first of all? And why? And what happened after? Zayn!” Harry’s questions all mixed together and the effect of not eating all day started to work on Zayn quickly as he got light headed and had to slide down to sit against a tree.

“It happened a couple of minutes before I called you; I don’t know why. It just happened and he pulled away and then I said sorry and left,” Zayn answered.

“Smooth, Zayn,” Zayn could hear the eye rolling in Harry’s voice.

“Not my best moment, I’m aware, Harry. But I panicked, ok? I didn’t know what to do!”

“And how do you think Liam feels?” Harry retorted, “You always do this.”

“I always do what?” Zayn asked, a bit offended because Harry was supposed to be on his side.

“You do something stupid and freak out but you never think about what the other person involved is going through. Did you even stop to think about the fact that Liam’s not even gay, Zayn? I’m pretty sure he has a bit more to freak out over than you do,” Harry explained.

Zayn struck the palm of his hand against his forehead, “Jesus fucking Christ.”

“I’m just saying, Zayn. He has his own shit that he’s probably dealing with without having to worry about his reputation and sexuality to add into the mix.”

“I wasn’t thinking like that when it happened, Harry,” Zayn told him.

“I know you weren’t,” Harry responded tiredly.

“But what am I supposed to do now, though? I can’t go to your room but I obviously can’t go back there either.”

“No, you can come here, Zayn. You _should_ come here actually so you and Niall can talk,” Harry told him.

“Harry, I can’t do this with Niall, not right now,” Zayn shook his head even though Harry couldn’t see him.

“Well, when do you plan on handling it then, Zayn? Are you going to avoid everyone tomorrow too?” Harry asked.

“Harry I _can’t_ ,” Zayn pled.

“You _can_ , you just don’t want to,” Harry said flatly. “I don’t know what you think I can do for you if you don’t even want to fix things for yourself, Zayn.”

“Harry please.”

“You’ve gotta stop doing this shit, Zayn,” Harry sighed into his phone, “You always go and get yourself into these bad situations and who always has to come pull you out of them?” Zayn rolled his eyes and didn’t bother with responding. “Who Zayn?”

“You,” Zayn mumbled in annoyance.

“Me,” Harry confirmed obnoxiously, “Now if I give you advice are you going to do what I say?”

“Yeah but-“

“Are you going to do it or not, Zayn? I don’t think you’d be asking for my help unless you needed it,” Harry reminded him smugly and Zayn wanted to reach through the phone to choke him.

“Yes, Harry.”

“Good boy,” Zayn could hear Harry’s triumphant smirk in his voice, “So first of all I guess you can skip dinner since that’ll probably be awkward but you need to be in our room afterwards so that we can all talk. And then you should talk to Liam, like tonight. Tell him you were just being an impulsive idiot and apologize again and then come back to sleep in our room because we miss you.”

“So much talking,” Zayn groaned.

“Well if you wouldn’t do stupid shit, you wouldn’t have to talk about it,” Harry told him and Zayn rolled his eyes again.

“You just love this don’t you?” Zayn asked in annoyance.

“Love what?” Harry asked innocently.

“Having me tell you I fucked up,” Zayn kicked at a tree stump with the toe of his shoes hard enough to instantly regret it.

“I like hearing you own up to things but no, I’m not particularly a fan of you fucking up. I don’t like seeing you upset,” Harry told him and Zayn smiled fondly but also with a bit of sadness.

_‘How can you do these things with these people, knowing it’s obvious that they care about you and love you but still think they’re disposable?’_

“Harry, you know I care about you, right?” Zayn asked immediately as Liam’s words from the night before had resurfaced in his mind.

“Most of the time,” Harry spoke slowly, “Why?”

“I just needed to make sure you know,” Zayn said.

“You’re not about to do something else bad, are you? Zayn?” Harry asked urgently.

“No, Harry. I’m fine. I just needed to make sure you know I care about you boys,” Zayn said wistfully.

“Ok well I care about you too, Zayn …” Harry drew out, “I hope I see you in our room after dinner. Do you want me to bring you something? Have you eaten today?”

“I had some stuff from the vending machines earlier and Liam brought me sandwich and juice from lunch. But yeah, could you bring me something please?” And Liam’s words sacked Zayn again. He was such a shit person.

“Will you be in our room, Zayn?” Harry asked again.

“Yes, Harry,” Zayn answered.

“Ok well I’ll bring you something. See you in a few. And think about what you’re going to say so you don’t make him mad again. Be nice,” Harry instructed him before he hung up.

 

+++

“What are you doing in here?” Niall asked when he walked into his and Harry’s room to find Zayn sitting on their beds that he’d already pushed together by himself.

“I wanted to talk to you,” Zayn said feebly.

“About what?” Niall asked him flatly.

“I wanted to apologize for earlier,” Zayn patted the space in his lap for Niall to sit in but Niall just looked at him like he was crazy. Harry had been standing up on the other side of the room in front of the chair in his desk and nodded at Niall for him to sit with Zayn. Niall glared between the both of them but gave in and sat down in Zayn’s lap.

“You were upset and I should have talked to you about it instead of being stupid,” Zayn said into the warm skin of Niall’s cheek while he rubbed his thumb at the skin under Niall’s waistband.

“You were being a stupid twat,” Niall conceded.

“Do you forgive me?” Zayn asked with a long kiss to Niall’s neck as he slipped a hand into Niall’s shorts to wrap around his cock.

“Are you going to give us apology blowjobs?” Niall retorted.

“ _Us_?” Zayn asked him incredulously and glanced over at Harry’s coy smirk.

“We both missed you, and Harry had to put up with my shit today after you pissed me off,” Niall told him, “He deserves one too.” Harry nodded his agreement.

Zayn rolled his eyes, “I _suppose_.”

+++

Zayn wiped his swollen lips and rubbed at his aching jaw as he shut the door to the boys’ room and walked back down to B-Hall. He’d had to lie again (sort of) to get out of the room since he hadn’t really gotten around to telling Niall about his and Liam’s kiss but he’d at least said that he needed to talk to Liam about something and promised to be back quickly.

Zayn took a big breath when he turned the knob of their door and deflated immediately when he found that Liam wasn’t inside. He went to Louis’s room next but he wasn’t in there either. He checked the Rec Room and the bathrooms but Liam was nowhere to be found. Then the thought of the deck popped into his mind and lo and behold there he was sitting on the same recliner from earlier, headphones in and eyes on the shimmering lake.

He startled at Zayn’s sudden appearance as Zayn sat down across from him and took out his headphones.

“Are you about to smoke?” Liam asked, looking Zayn up and down.

“No, I was looking for you,” Zayn told him gently.

“For what?” Liam glared at him skeptically again making Zayn feel so much smaller than usual.

“I wanted to apologize for earlier. And talk maybe; only if you wanted,” Zayn suggested cautiously, leaving the ball in Liam’s court.

“You did apologize earlier,” Liam shrugged.

“I mean for everything. For bringing Perrie over, for rushing out of the room without letting you talk to me, for- you know. I’m sorry, Liam. I really am,” Zayn apologized to him quietly trying his best to maintain eye contact even though they both continuously looked away.

“Well I can’t say that it’s ok, because it’s not,” Liam said seriously, “But I forgive you.”

“Thank you,” Zayn let out a little breath of relief.

“Can you tell me why, though?” Liam asked, his voice almost falling silent against the sounds of the moving lake and crickets of the night. Zayn glanced into his worried brown eyes and then looked back down.

“Why what?” He asked.

“Why everything. Why did you bring her? Why did last night happen? Why did this morning happen? And why did you leave me?” Liam asked and blushed in embarrassment. Zayn shrugged but Liam frowned at him, “You don’t get to be silent after all of that, Zayn. Talk to me, I know you can.”

Zayn shook his head and licked his lips in frustration, “I don’t know. I just-. It all just happened.”

“Bullshit,” Liam shook his head, “You know this didn’t ‘just happen’, Zayn. _You_ did this. Now tell me _why_ you did this.” Zayn pouted at him weakly but Liam’s stare was merciless.

It was silent for a moment as Zayn opened his mouth to speak but shut it again and swallowed. He knew he was the one that offered to talk but he hadn’t been prepared to have this deep of a discussion.

“Please just talk,” Liam soothed him as his face fell with pity.

“I shouldn’t have brought Perrie over. And I shouldn’t have did that stuff last night and this morning. I’m … a mess. I’m a mess, Liam and I’m sorry that I’ve pulled you into it. I’m sorry,” Zayn finally spoke.

“So you’re saying you asked me to stay with you last night and kissed me this morning because you’re a mess? That’s your excuse?” Liam asked and Zayn flinched at how scathing Liam’s tone had gotten so quickly.

“Well what do you want me to say?” Zayn shot back.

“The truth! Unless that was the truth and if it was, it’s shit,” Liam said.

“What, do you want me to tell you I like you and then kiss you again and we’ll become exclusive little boyfriends with a happily ever after, Liam? Huh, is that what you want?” Zayn spat.

“Fuck you,” Liam shook his head with glassy eyes and disgust.

“If that’s what you want me to say, then fine. I like you, Liam. I do. It wasn’t a secret,” Zayn told him blatantly.

“You’re an asshole,” Liam spat back.

“Is this not what you fucking wanted?” Zayn asked him.

“Not like this,” Liam shook his head, biting his lip. Zayn swallowed and bit his own lips in response. “Maybe you were right. Maybe you really are a terrible person but I just didn’t see it until now. Maybe you’ve really been that guy all along but I’m just now realizing it.”

“Maybe I am,” Zayn agreed.

“And that’s what makes you an even bigger piece of shit. You let me believe that you were good, that I was ok with you, that I could trust you, knowing the whole time what you really were. Did you even care about anything I said to you or were you just counting down the days until you made your move and then tossed me like the rest of them?” Liam asked him, his lip trembling and his eyes starting to water again. Zayn wanted to get mad and say something mean but looking at the way Liam was curling into himself on the recliner made his heart ache. He did this. He caused this.

“Liam,” Zayn said quietly.

“No. Answer me,” Liam instructed, not even bothering to try to hide the fact that he was crying.

“Of course I cared,” Zayn breathed. Liam looked at him and then down at the ground shaking his head. “I do, Liam,” Zayn pled, “I care about you.”

“Then why would you do this?” Liam asked, “What was the one thing I told you I needed more than anything right now?” _Stability._

_‘As soon as I think I’ve got a grip, I’m losing it again.’_

“Fuck, Liam, I’m sorry,” Zayn apologized with pleading eyes.

“You said that, Zayn,” Liam looked at the lake, “Do you know how freaked out I’ve been? Because of this? I’m not- you know that. But you …,” Liam didn’t finish his sentence. “I’m scared, Zayn. I’m scared of this and you definitely have not been making this any easier,” he admitted.

Zayn swallowed at the sudden weight pushing down on his chest and shoulders, “I’m-“

“Don’t say it again,” Liam whispered and Zayn nodded. “I don’t know what’s going to happen, Zayn. It seems like I never know anymore but you do. If you’re going to leave again, just go ahead and do it and spare me anymore embarrassment and torment but if you’re going to stay-“

Zayn had cut him off by standing up which shocked Liam because he thought Zayn was going to walk away but he sat down beside Liam on his recliner instead.

“I’m not leaving again,” Zayn assured him.

“Ok,” Liam nodded with his head hung but Zayn put his hand under Liam’s chin to pick his face up. Zayn could see the way that Liam’s entire body froze beneath his fingertips and the amount of power he had in the moment was overwhelming.

“Tell me what you want from me,” Zayn prompted him.

Liam glanced away but Zayn stroked his thumb on Liam’s cheek to make him look at Zayn again, “I don’t know.”

“Yes you do,” Zayn nodded his head, “Tell me.”

“I want you, Zayn,” Liam whispered and it took all of Zayn’s might not cut him off with another kiss because he knew Liam wasn’t finished or ready. “But I don’t want to just...  fool around, be some side piece. I want all of you. I want to talk to you and get to know you for real. I want to know that I’m not crazy for thinking that you might have actually cared about me too.”

“I care,” Zayn whispered, “I’m here. I want you too, you’re not crazy. You can have all of that, Liam.”

“But I can’t,” Liam frowned and Zayn knew that it’d been coming.

He bit his lips and looked down in guilt, “But I promise you one day you can.”

“But what happens until then, Zayn?” Liam asked him desperately, “Do I keep going to sleep in that room by myself, wondering whether or not I’m going to wake up to find you with someone else in your bed? And watch you kiss Harry and Niall in front of me all day and pretend it doesn’t mean anything?”

“I promise you I won’t do that again, Liam,” Zayn assured him, “And as for the Niall and Harry thing, I know it sucks, ok? I know but I need time to get all of this figured out. They need me right now but I promise there’s going to come a time when it’s just me and you and no one else, ok?” Zayn wrapped his arm around Liam’s neck and pulled him in to press a kiss to Liam’s forehead. Liam ran his thumb over Zayn’s hand gently.

“What about Perrie?” Liam asked quietly.                    

“I’ll get that figured out too,” Zayn promised, “Just trust me, ok? Will you do that?”

“I’ll try,” Liam said quietly and Zayn figured it was better than nothing.

“I have to go back to Harry and Niall’s but I’ll see you in the morning, ok?” Zayn pressed another kiss to Liam’s temple before he stood up, “Do you want me to walk you back to our room?”

“Nah, I’d rather not stay in there alone. I’ll probably stay out here for a little longer then go to Louis’s,” Liam told him.

“You sure?” Zayn asked and Liam nodded. “Well I’ll see you in the morning, ok?” Zayn gave him a small hug before he left to go back inside.

 

Zayn’s head was spinning as he went back through the maze of halls to Harry and Niall’s room. It was so bad that he had to stop in the D-Hall bathroom to splash his face with cold water and look in the mirror at his reflection for a long time. What the fuck had he just done? He was fucked. Royally and thoroughly fucked but there was no taking it back now.

He shook his head and took another deep breath before he opened the door and found Harry and Niall curled around each other, Harry’s fingers trailing up and down Niall’s side while they talked about something though they hushed when Zayn walked in.

“You ok?” Harry asked him. Zayn glanced at him and nodded.

“Must’ve been something pretty serious as long as you were gone for,” Niall commented.

“I um, had a smoke outside too,” Zayn rubbed the back of his neck and both Harry and Niall glowered at him.

“You’re wearing my jumper,” Harry frowned.

“It’s comfortable,” Zayn shrugged.

“Ok but your smoke sticks to everything, Zayn,” Harry complained.

“Are you ok?” Niall asked him and Zayn turned from Harry to look at him as he sat down at Niall’s desk.

“What do you mean? Of course I’m ok,” Zayn told him.

“It’s just you’re smoking a lot more than usual,” Niall said, “And you usually only do that when you’re upset about something that you’re not talking about.”

Zayn glanced at Harry and then back at Niall, “I’m fine.”

“Are you sure?” Niall asked skeptically.

“Yes.”

“Well is there something you’re not telling us, then?”

Zayn glanced at Harry again and Harry raised his brows silently telling him that this was _Zayn’s_ bed that he’d made for himself to lie in, not theirs. “Zayn?” Niall asked when he still hadn’t answered.

“No,” Zayn finally spoke.

“Zayn,” Niall said sternly.

“No,” Zayn repeated.

“Do you know something that I don’t?” Niall turned to look at Harry. Harry glanced at Zayn who was watching him with pleading eyes and then back at Niall without saying anything.“You two keep fucking looking at each other so I know you’re lying. Tell me what’s going on.”

“Niall, babe, it’s n-“ Harry started but Niall was already scooting away from where he’d been tucked under Harry’s arm to distance himself.

“Stop fucking lying to me,” Niall demanded, “Something is going on and I want to know what. I want to know right fucking now.”

Harry and Zayn shared a forlorn look before they both turned to Niall.

“I kissed Liam today,” Zayn admitted quietly and Niall frowned at him.

“And what else?” Niall asked.

“What do you mean?” Zayn asked back.

“I mean what the hell else happened? What did you do when you went to your room just now, Zayn?” Niall crossed his arms authoritatively.

“We talked, that’s it,” Zayn assured him.

“Are you lying again?” Niall accused.

“No,” Zayn said defensively, “That’s really all we did.”

Niall looked him up and down before he turned to look at Harry, “Did you know?” Harry clenched his jaw without answering. “Harry,” Niall growled.

“I mean yeah but-“ Harry started but Niall cut him off.

 “What else have you two not told me?” Niall asked them angrily.

Zayn cut his eyes at Harry, silently telling him that he’d better tell Niall about what happened with Louis in the Rec Room.

“Um,” Harry swallowed and glanced at Zayn but Zayn’s stare was unyielding. _You better tell him or I will_. “It was just me and Louis that first night when we were all supposed to go to the Rec Room. Nothing happened so I didn’t say anything.”

“God,” Niall breathed and shook his head, “What’s even the point anymore?”

“Nothing happened,” Harry repeated defensively.

“Did you tell him?” Niall asked Harry and Harry looked away. “What is this? Who are you two? What happened to us being honest with each other? And fucking caring about each other? I mean, I don’t know about you two but I fucking cared about and respected you guys. What the fuck does that say about what you think of me?”

“Niall it’s not like that-“ Harry started but Niall cut him off again.

“What is it like then, Harry?” Niall shot him the iciest glare either of them had ever seen from him.

“We just didn’t want to-“ Zayn cut himself off and sighed.

“God, I feel like such an idiot,” Niall hung his head and rubbed his hands down his face.

“Niall,” Harry breathed and leaned over to put a hand on his back but Niall flinched away from him.

“No. This is not ok,” Niall looked between the two of them, “You two don’t just get to lie to me and then pretend everything’s alright. This is not alright.”

“We’re sorry,” Harry argued.

“Zayn’s not,” Niall glared at him.

“Yeah, I am,” Zayn said defensively.

“No you’re not. You always do this. You know, fuck, why am I even surprised by this? You’ve been doing the same thing with Perrie all this time. What’s one more person in the mix, right? But you,” Niall looked over at Harry, “I wasn’t expecting that from you. I thought I could trust you. I thought out of everyone, you’d be the one I could trust to not hurt me. But I guess I was wrong,” Niall whispered, shaking his head in disappointment.

“Niall,” Harry whispered, his face scrunching up like he was about to cry.

Niall let out a little breath through his nose and shook his head as he got up from the bed, “I’m gonna go take a walk. It’d be nice if you weren’t here when I got back,” he shot at Zayn, “And if your bed was as far away from mine as possible,” he told Harry before he opened the door and left.

“Jesus,” Zayn muttered as he ran a hand through his hair and sat on the bed beside Harry. Harry rested his face down in his palms and Zayn wrapped his arm around his shoulders, pressing a kiss to Harry’s temple while Harry’s tears slipped through his fingers into the fabric of Zayn’s jumper.

“God, I never wanted any of this,” Harry cried, his voice shaking.

“He’s just mad right now. Give him time to cool off. Everything will probably be ok again tomorrow,” Zayn assured him.

“And if it’s not?”

“And if it’s not you have Louis. And you still have me. And I’ve got you,” Zayn told him.

“But what about Niall? What has he got?” Harry asked and Zayn looked down, “He trusted us, Zayn. And we both screwed him over. God, _I_ screwed him over. It was bad enough when it was just you; at least he still had me but what happens now?”

“I don’t know,” Zayn said quietly because he honestly had no idea what was going to happen next.


	3. Chapter 3

Zayn left shortly after Niall did which left Harry curled in the corner of the still-pressed together beds when Niall came staggering back into the room an hour later. It was clear from how he was stumbling and grasping at nothing that he’d been drinking and Harry wasn’t particularly thrilled about having to deal with a drunk and angry Niall without Zayn’s help.

“What the fuck is this?” Niall slurred as soon as he threw open the door to their room and saw that his and Harry’s beds were still together. Harry’s gaze immediately fixed on him and he rushed to the door to help Niall in. “Stop it. Don’t help me. Don’t touch me. Stop it, Harry,” Niall whined, trying to shrug Harry away from him.

“You need to be quiet before you wake someone up,” Harry whisper-scolded him as he walked Niall to the bed.

“I’m not getting in until you pull them apart,” Niall frowned at the beds and then at Harry. Harry rolled his eyes exasperatedly.

“Niall, I’m tired and I really don’t want to do this now. Please, can you just get into bed?” Harry pled tiredly.

“No. I’m mad at you. I don’t want to sleep next to you, Harry. I don’t want to touch you. I want my space. I want my own bed,” Niall demanded and even though Harry knew he was drunk, Niall’s jabs still wounded him all the same.

“Please,” Harry whispered, his voice tired and his eyes sad, “Please just get into bed, Niall.”

Niall looked down at the bed and then glared at Harry but kicked off his shoes and got into the bed. Harry closed his eyes and let out a sigh of relief as he sat down on the edge of the opposite side.

“What are you doing?” Niall asked him when he hadn’t lied down.

Harry let out another deep breath, “I’m thinking.”

“About what?” Niall asked.

“Whether or not I should get you paracetamol and water,” Harry grumbled as he turned around to look at him.

Niall held his glare for a moment in silence before he spoke again, “Where’s Zayn?”

“He left after you did,” Harry got up to start looking for the pills and money to buy Niall a bottle of water from the vending machine.

“Figures,” Niall mumbled as he started playing with a rubber band ball from Harry’s desk.

“Where did you find alcohol?” Harry asked him as he pawed through his desk drawer.

“Does it matter?” Niall snarked, “And I don’t want to talk to you.”

“Niall,” Harry frowned at him with a pitiful look on his face but Niall just continued to toss the ball in the air without paying him any attention.

“Can you shut the light off on your way out? And stay on your side please?” Niall threw the ball across the room and then pulled the duvet over his head to shield himself from the light to go to sleep, ending the conversation.

+++

Zayn didn’t mind waking up to the sight of hard abs and wet tan skin at all the next morning when Liam came in from his morning jog. He’d tried to be quiet as he shut the door behind him and tip toed across the room but Zayn still woke up anyways.

“Morning,” Zayn gave him a small half smile as he slowly propped himself up on his elbows in his bed and ran a hand through his sleep mussed hair.

“Morning,” Liam smiled back at him brightly, “Did I wake you up?”

Zayn shrugged, “It’s fine. It’s a nice sight to be woken up to so I don’t mind.”

Liam blushed and turned back to search through his drawer for something to wear to mass, “Well it was nice to see you here when I woke up. I was pleasantly surprised.” Zayn smiled at him but it wavered as he remembered the events of the night before. “You ok?” Liam asked, taking note of Zayn’s change in expression.

“Yeah,” Zayn said quietly. He considered telling Liam about what had happened with Niall and Harry but stopped himself, figuring it was better to keep all of his messes separate from each other.

“Well we should probably start getting ready,” Liam suggested as he nestled his clothes and toiletries into his arms.

“Mass isn’t for another-” Zayn turned to look at the clock on his desk, “Like hour and a half. I’m going back to sleep.”

“Suit yourself,” Liam shrugged and left.

+++

Usually on Sundays Harry would wake up to slow sunlight creeping into the windows while he cuddled into the warmth of  Zayn and Niall’s warm naked bodies until they were forced to get up and get dressed to go to mass but unfortunately this morning Zayn had already left the night before and Niall was gone by the time Harry had woken up. It was also overcast outside which let Harry know that it was going to be a shit day.

He spent all of his time getting ready in near solitude which made him feel sad and awkward. He’d usually at least have Niall to talk to and brush up against while he brushed his teeth and fool around with in the shower but he was alone this morning. He didn’t have much interaction with anyone until he made his way down to B-Hall towards Zayn’s room.

He knocked before he opened the door but it wasn’t enough time for Liam and Zayn to separate themselves from where they’d been curled up in Zayn’s bed talking. Harry immediately shut the door and waited for Zayn to pull himself away to join him in the hall.

“What are you doing here?” Zayn asked him with an accusing tone.

“I could ask you the same thing,” Harry snarked.

“This is _my_ room,” Zayn reminded him as if Harry’d forgtten.

“I’m aware. Have you seen Niall lately or have you been too busy playing with your new toy?” Harry cocked his chin towards the door and crossed his arms.

“I thought you were handling this,” Zayn cut his eyes at Harry.

Harry let out a little puff through his nose as he raked a hand through his hair, “I cannot fucking believe you. This isn’t just about me, Zayn. This is your problem too. This is mainly your problem actually, seeing as how it’s your fault.”

“Here we go,” Zayn sighed and rolled his eyes as he put a hand on the knob.

“Could you at least act like you fucking care?” Harry shook his head at him.

“I do care, Harry. But I’m getting tired of it,” Zayn shrugged. Harry let out another breath of disbelief and shook his head at Zayn again. “What?”

Harry looked him up and down as he continued to shake his head, “I just can’t believe it took us this long to realize it.”

“Realize what?” Zayn asked in an annoyed tone.

“What a piece of shit you are,” Harry spat, “We cared about you. We loved you but we never meant anything to you. We were just people to have a good time with, right? Perrie too? We never mattered to you, did we? That’s why this is so easy for you. You can just break everything and walk away because none of it means anything to you. You’re not losing a damn thing.”

“That’s not true,” Zayn tried to look at Harry but had to avert his gaze when he saw the tears starting to well in his eyes.

“Yeah it is, Zayn and you fucking know it. You gonna do the same thing to him too?” Harry glanced at the door. Zayn set his jaw and rolled his shoulders back in silence, a sign Harry had learned over the years that meant Zayn was upset but trying hard not to show it. “If you see Niall let me know. And try not to shove your new doll in his face please; I think you’ve put him through enough,” Harry muttered before he walked away.

 

“How much trouble are you in?” Liam asked when Zayn came back into the room, shutting the door behind himself as he took in a deep breath.

“How much of it did you hear?” Zayn asked.

Liam frowned, “I was trying not to listen.”

Zayn pressed off of the door to sit in his desk chair and rolled to sit between Liam’s parted legs where he was still sitting on Zayn’s bed. He put his arms around Liam’s lower back and Liam pulled him into a hug, hooking his chin on Zayn’s shoulder as he held him for a moment. He didn’t know what was going on but he told Zayn that it was all going to be ok and there was nothing more that Zayn needed than what Liam was giving him in that moment. They held on to each other like that until the bell for mass started and they pulled apart.

“Ready?” Zayn asked as he stood up from the chair and straightened his clothes before he extended his hand to pull Liam up from his bed.

“Yeah. Is it weird that I’m kind of nervous?” he asked as he followed Zayn out of the door and into the hallway.

“Why are you nervous? It’s just mass,” Zayn smiled in adoration.

“I’ve never been before,” Liam said defensively, “My family isn’t exactly the most religious. It’s intimidating.”

“It’s really not that scary,” Zayn assured him, “And plus you’ll have me.” That made Liam smile which warmed Zayn’s heart as he wrapped his arm around Liam’s neck as they continued to walk down the hall.

“Should we meet the others?” Liam asked and Zayn pursed his lips.

“Well Niall’s missing apparently and Harry’s not too keen on me either at the mo’ but we can meet Louis if you want,” Zayn shrugged.

“Yeah we should probably check to make sure he’s up,” Liam said.

 

Just as Liam expected, Louis was still in bed when they got to his room, his curtains drawn and duvet thrown over his face.

“Louis,” Liam frowned as he threw open the curtains to let sun the in and sat on his bed. Zayn could hear Louis’s sleepy murmur and whine from where he was still standing in the doorway. “Louis get up. It’s Sunday. We have to go to church.”

“Is that what that massive bell is?” Louis asked as he rolled over away from Liam’s voice.

“Louis get up. It’s our first Sunday here. You can’t start missing things already. It’s this exact kind of shit that landed us here in the first place,” Liam tugged the duvet from Louis in annoyance but Louis tugged it right back.

“Get out,” Louis hissed.

“Get up,” Liam argued.

“I’ll go next time,” Louis rolled towards the wall to get away from him.

“Louis,” Liam said exasperatedly.

“Li, we’re gonna be late,” Zayn cooed softly from the door knowing there was no use. He did the same thing for a whole month when he’d first gotten here. He’d gotten in trouble with Headmaster Grimshaw for it of course, but Louis would have to find that out for himself later.

Liam shoved at the Louis-lump under the covers before he left, slamming the door shut behind him in frustration.

“Why am I even surprised?” Liam let out a sigh as they walked into the common area towards the chapel.

“Is he always like this?” Zayn asked.

“Basically. He’s a stubborn little prick when he doesn’t want to do something or when he really wants something. It’s annoying and always affects me as well but the Prince does as he wishes anyways,” Liam sneered.

+++

Louis had just been on his way to drifting back to sleep when he heard a knocking at his door again.

“Go away, Liam,” he yelled from under the covers assuming he’d come back.

“It’s not Liam,” the voice on the other side of the door said. Louis’s brows furrowed.

“Who is it then?”

“It’s Harry,” the voice said and Louis suddenly felt awake.

“Come in, come in,” Louis told him.

Harry opened the door and Louis immediately sat up in his bed, trying to fix his hair that he knew was sticking up in every direction.

“What are you doing?” Harry asked as he came into the room and leaned back against Louis’s desk. Louis’s brain wasn’t completely awake yet and he decided to make that the reason why he was more focused on imagining being on his knees while Harry leaned back on his desk in that same position, a hand going white as he gripped onto the edge of the wood while another played in the ruffles of Louis’s hair, than on answering Harry’s question.

“Needed a quick kip,” he said when he finally remembered to answer.

“It’s Sunday morning,” Harry told him as if he didn’t already know.

“What are _you_ doing here?” Louis asked him, a bit accusingly but more out of curiosity. He definitely didn’t mind Harry’s presence but he found it quite interesting that Zayn had come with Liam earlier and Harry was here in his room rather than with them or Niall.

“Well I was going to ask you to sit with me during mass but you’re clearly not going,” Harry flushed with embarrassment and averted his gaze to the ground though it made Louis smile fondly.

“Aw, you wanted to sit with me?” Louis grinned.

“Well Niall’s mad at me and I’m mad at Zayn. And I thought you’d be with Zayn and your brother but I passed them on my way here and you weren’t with them,” Harry rubbed the burning back of his neck.

“So I’m just your back up then?” Louis joked but his grin dropped.

“No, no,” Harry said quickly when he noticed the slight shift in Louis’s demeanor, “I did want to sit with you it’s just- complicated.”

“Boyfriend drama?” Louis asked.

“We’re not boyfriends,” Harry corrected, a bit of self pity in his tone, “But something like that.”

“Are you ok?” Louis asked and it sounded like he genuinely cared. Harry looked at him, the way his expression was warm and inviting like he would listen to whatever Harry had to say for as long as it took him but he stopped himself. Or he at least tried to anyways.

“I’m fine,” Harry murmured, averting his gaze from Louis because he’d never been good at looking people in the eye when he wasn’t telling the truth.

“Bullshit,” Louis called it. Harry glanced at him. “I’m good at picking out when people are lying and you, my friend, are particularly awful at it.”

“I am,” Harry agreed as he hung his head with an embarrassed smile on his face. Louis patted the space beside him on his bed and motioned for Harry to sit. Harry obliged.

“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to,” Louis told him, “But I’m willing to help if you need it.”

Harry shook his head and focused his gaze on the pile of clothes Louis had already started to build in the corner of his room, “Things are just really weird between all of us right now. It’s never been like this before and especially not for this long.”

“What happened?” Louis asked gently.

Harry swallowed. “You and your brother,” he muttered.

“What did we do?” Louis asked in bewilderment, “I thought you guys liked us!”

“We do,” Harry said quietly.

“Then what’s the problem?” Louis asked, a bit of hurt seeping into his voice.

“That’s the problem,” Harry let out a puff of air.

“I don’t get it,” Louis furrowed his brows.

“Please don’t make me have to spell it out for you,” Harry put his face in his hands in embarrassment.

Louis stared at him in confusion, “You may have to mate because I’m really not understanding what you’re getting at.”

“Louis, you can’t really be that thick,” Harry looked at Louis, his face definitely burning red with embarrassment.

Louis looked back at him and Harry raised his brows but Louis cocked his head, still not getting it.

“Oh my gosh,” Harry sighed, “I like you. And Zayn likes Liam. And Niall doesn’t like that.”

“Oh,” Louis sat back, his face softening with understanding, “Oh I can see how that could cause problems.” But his brows furrowed again, “Well, Zayn’s gonna be disappointed though.”

“Why?” Harry asked.

“Liam doesn’t like guys,” Louis told him and Harry narrowed his eyes. “What?”

“Did he not tell you?” Harry asked.

“Not tell me what?” Louis asked as he sat up with curiosity and leaned closer to Harry.

“I probably shouldn’t if he hasn’t told you himself,” Harry looked away.

“Well you can’t just start and not tell me,” Louis urged, “Come on, tell me.”

“Fuck,” Harry muttered, “Something happened is all I’m gonna say. Liam should be the one to tell you.”

“Did they fuck?” Louis’s eyes widened.

“No,” Harry shot back immediately, “At least not as far as I know anyways.”

“Well that’s something innit?” Louis leaned back against the wall, “What gold.”

“What?” Harry asked.

“It’s just Liam is always ragging on me for liking guys and now he likes one himself. Already falling head over heels, I’m sure, for a bloke he’s only met a few days ago. My, my, my how the tables have turned,” Louis shook his head.

“What do you mean ‘ragging on you’?” Harry asked, narrowing his eyes.

“I mean he’s not really homophobic or anything. But he can be quite ignorant at times. And he blamed my being gay for why we’ve been sent here; that among other things. But I know it’s always bothered him. Maybe because he was hiding something himself, I don’t know,” Louis explained as he stared off at the wall.

“Maybe,” Harry commented, “But this could just be a fluke. I mean Zayn is pretty hot. I don’t think anyone could turn him down.”

“Yeah, I bet,” Louis looked Harry up and down.

“What was that?” Harry chuckled.

“You really like me, then?” Louis asked with a proud grin on his face. Harry opened his mouth to speak but shook his head and let out a puff of air with a blushing smile as he turned away from Louis. “Come on, tell me again,” Louis put a hand on the small of Harry’s back to egg him on. If only he knew how much his touch burned into Harry’s skin.

“No, it’s embarrassing. Once was enough,” Harry hid his face in his hands.

“Oh come on Mr. Styles, you don’t seem the type to get embarrassed so easily,” Louis tried to pry Harry’s hands away but Harry moved his knees up to cover his face further.

“Harry come on, say it again,” Louis teased as he crawled closer to Harry on the bed and put a hand on one of his knees to push them apart.

Harry immediately stopped fighting back, instead letting Louis push his knees apart as his hands fell away from his face. He held his breath for a moment, waiting for Louis’s next move and watched the coy smirk on Louis’s face as he looked from Harry’s eyes to his lips and back again with his hand still on Harry’s knee, now sliding down toward the inside of his thigh.

“Say it again,” Louis commanded, his voice gruffer than Harry’d heard it before.

“I like you,” Harry said quietly, still averting his gaze.

“ _To_ _me_ ,” Louis cupped Harry’s chin in the hand that wasn’t on his thigh and turned Harry’s face so that he was staring directly into the piercing blue of Louis’s eyes.

Harry licked his lips and swallowed before he repeated himself a bit more confidently than before, “I like you, Louis.”

Louis’s smile returned as he nodded and looked at Harry’s lips again before he looked into his eyes and said, “I like you too, Harry,” which made Harry smile and Louis smile again just because he’d made it happen. “What do you suppose we should do about it?”

Harry’s eyes traveled down from Louis’s to glance at the hand Louis still had on Harry’s thigh and Louis smirked, ”Naughty one aren’t we? It’s Sunday morning.”

“You’re the one with a hand on my thigh,” Harry smirked.

“You don’t seem to mind,” Louis smirked back and bit down on his lip.

Harry glanced down from Louis’s eyes to his lips one more time before Louis gave him a slight nod and he leaned in to press their lips together. Louis kept his hand on Harry’s thigh, sliding it down even more as he crawled closer towards Harry on the bed with their slips still slotted together. Harry put both of his hands on Louis’s hips as he leaned back on the bed and pulled Louis to crawl on top of him.

Harry eventually pulled away from Louis’s mouth to press a trail of kisses down his neck before he stopped at his collar to suck a small mark onto the skin pulled tight over his bone.

“Oh god,” Louis groaned as he rutted his hips slightly against Harry’s.

“This ok?” Harry asked, his voice rougher than before.

“Don’t start something you can’t finish,” Louis warned him.

“What do you mean?” Harry paused his lips to frown.

“Everyone knows what neck kisses mean babe,” Louis raised his brows but Harry was distracted by Louis’s sudden pet name for him.

“Who says I can’t finish you off?” Harry batted his eyelashes up at him and Louis bit down on his lip in response in an attempt to hold himself off.

“Niall’s gonna be pissed,” Louis started but Harry pressed his fingertips into the small of his back which made protesting so much harder because neither of them really wanted to stop.

“Niall’s already mad,” Harry shrugged and kissed his way back up Louis’s neck toward his cheek.

“This is wrong,” Louis breathed in between Harry’s kisses to his lips.

“So wrong,” Harry muttered as he pulled Louis’s hips down against his to get some friction.

“We shouldn’t,” Louis gasped.

“Do you want to stop?” Harry asked as he pressed another kiss to Louis’s neck and rubbed their crotches together again.

“No,” Louis shook his head.

“Good,” Harry smirked and pulled Louis down into another kiss.

+++

“See that wasn’t too bad was it?” Zayn asked Liam as they filed out of the chapel after mass.

“No. It wasn’t that exciting but it wasn’t as intimidating as I thought it’d be either,” Liam commented.

“Did you want to eat now or see if we could find the others?” Zayn asked.

“I wanted to stop off at Louis’s first if you don’t mind. I don’t think he even got up for mass,” Liam rolled his eyes as they started on towards the dorms.

 

“Jesus Christ,” Liam muttered after he’d opened Louis’s door and shut it immediately.

“What?” Zayn asked. Liam rolled his eyes again without answering.

“Is this what you missed mandatory mass for, Lou?” Liam asked through the door, annoyance thick in his voice.

“Can I help you?” Louis asked, only poking his head out of the door with his hair sticking up in every direction.

“What the fuck is the matter with you?” Liam frowned at him.

“Could ask you the same thing,” Louis glanced at Zayn and then looked Liam up and down.

“I can go,” Zayn started.

“No,” Liam frowned at him and then turned back to Louis, “What is that supposed to mean?”

“Let’s not do this now,” Louis told him quietly and Liam winced as he closed the door.

“God I can’t fucking stand him sometimes,” Liam shook his head as they started to walk back towards the dining hall.

“What was that?” Zayn asked as he walked closer beside Liam and brushed his knuckles against the skin of his hand.

“Louis being an arse as usual,” Liam hissed before Zayn slipped his hand into Liam’s and he settled.

 

 

“What was that?” Harry asked from Louis’s bed as he shut the door and walked back over to climb in beside him.

“Liam and Zayn,” Louis informed.

“Fuck,” Harry groaned and leaned back as Louis laid down on top of him.

“He doesn’t know you were in here. Or he didn’t see you anyways. Liam might have seen you but I doubt it.”

“I should go,” Harry ran a hand through his hair and got up from the bed to redress himself.

“I’m gonna head out too. I’m hungry,” Louis declared as he got up.

“Same,” Harry agreed as he zipped up the fly of his trousers.

“We could eat together,” Louis shrugged noncommittally as he pulled on a t-shirt.

“We could,” Harry smirked, “But I should probably still check the room to see if Niall’s in there.”

“Ok,” Louis nodded, “Well I’ll meet you down there then I guess.”

“Yeah,” Harry smiled at him.

“What?” Louis couldn’t help but smile back. Harry shrugged without answering; he just kept smiling as he looked over Louis fondly while he fixed his hair. Harry opened the door for him on their way out and Louis let out a little laugh, “What a gentleman.”

 

When he got to the room, Niall was nowhere to be found, and Harry wasn’t really surprised. Niall usually didn’t come back to the room after mass anyways because he didn’t like having to wait in line. Harry took the alone time to do a check in the mirror before he left. Louis’d left a few marks on his neck that Niall and Zayn would be sure to notice later but Harry was too caught up in the moment to tell him to stop and frankly they were all being shitty sorta-kinda-not-really-boyfriends anyways.

To his surprise, he ran into Nick on his way out of the room and his face spelled out that Harry was already in for it.

“Well, if it isn’t Mr. Harry Styles, alive and well,” Nick snarked as he crossed his arms, pressing the clipboard he was holding to his chest in a show of authority.

“Headmaster Grimshaw,” Harry replied meekily as a few other students passed by.

“And where were you this morning at mass?” Nick asked with no shreds of tolerance for bullshit in his tone.

Harry cut his eyes at him suspiciously then glanced around the hall to make sure they were alone, “Are you asking as Headmaster Grimshaw or a jealous Nick?”

“Does it change your response either way?” Nick glared at him. Harry opened his mouth to respond but Nick cut him off, “Don’t lie to me, Harry. Where were you?”

Harry swallowed and frowned. “I’m not feeling well,” he muttered as he brushed past Nick to walk away.

“Don’t walk away from me,” Nick warned and Harry stopped. “You were with the Tomlinson boy, weren’t you?” Nick accused, his voice full of venom and it made Harry’s stomach churn.

“And if I was?” Harry snapped.

“Excuse me?” Nick asked, caught off guard at Harry’s surprisingly snarky response.

“You can’t tell me who I can and can’t be friends with,” Harry said defensively.

“You’re right. But I _can_ suspend you for failing to attend mass and fornication,” Nick stated simply.

“You can’t do that,” Harry shot back even though he knew very well that Nick could if he really wanted to.

“But I can though,” Nick smirked.

“Nick,” Harry choked as he felt his face starting to get hot, “Please.”

Nick glared him down for what felt like an eternity before he finally broke into a sickening chuckle and spoke, “I’m not going to suspend you, Harry; you can stop bricking yourself. But I am going to have to do something to punish you.”

“Like?” Harry asked.

“Haven’t decided,” Nick cut his eyes before he turned to leave but then he turned to face Harry again, “But if you ever try to undercut me like that again, there will be serious consequences, understood?” Harry nodded and Nick walked away.

Harry had to stop in the bathroom to rinse his face before he could go down to the dining hall. The exchange he’d had with Nick left him reeling and uncomfortable and he didn’t like the feeling at all. Nick had inclinations in the past about him, Zayn, and Niall, he’d seen marks from them in worse places before, but he’d never actually threatened Harry with disciplinary action before like that and it woke Harry up very quickly to exactly what he’d gotten himself into.

After he rinsed his face off again, he turned and rested back against the sink to just take a moment to breathe when the bathroom door opened and Louis came in.

“Are you ok?” Louis asked, concernedly as he walked in and stopped right in front of Harry, his close proximity making Harry feel a bit sick again, “You don’t look so good.”

“I’m fine,” Harry swallowed and turned away.

Louis paused, “You don’t look fine. Did something happen?”

“Nothing,” Harry kept his gaze away from Louis’s face and he backed away, “I just had a run in with Headmaster Grimshaw.”

“Are you in trouble?” Louis frowned.

“I don’t know,” Harry shook his head as he ran a hand through his hair and let out a deep sigh.

 Louis stepped in even closer and put his hands on Harry’s arms to steady him. Harry tried to move but Louis just tightened his grip and followed Harry’s face to get him to look at him, “What’s wrong?” Harry tried to look away but Louis followed his face again and forced him to make eye contact, “Talk to me, Harry. Tell me what’s wrong?”  “Is it me? Do you regret-“ Louis asked when Harry still hadn’t answered.

“No,” Harry said immediately but then he looked away again, “I don’t. Things are just shit right now.”

Louis looked down and then back up at Harry skeptically before he let him go and wrapped an arm around the taller lad’s shoulders instead, “Well I’m here whenever you need to talk, ok?”

“Ok,” Harry said quietly.

“Are you good to eat now?” Louis asked, nodding towards the door and Harry just nodded as Louis led him out of the door.

Harry didn’t talk much on their way down or while they waited in line for food but Louis filled in the silence well enough on his own. Harry actually preferred to have Louis’s voice in his ears over silence though and he tried his best to comment occasionally and nod to show his appreciation for Louis’s talking rather than annoyance. When they had their food, Louis asked if they should find the others but Harry frowned so he led them to an empty table instead so that they could be alone.

“Are you sure you’re ok?” Louis asked when he’d finished nearly all of his lunch but Harry’s food had remained nearly untouched.

Harry shook his head while he looked down and opened his mouth to speak when Niall passed by their table with Josh and a few of the other guys that usually hung around the music room and caught Harry’s eye. He looked Harry up and down and then glanced at Louis before he returned his gaze to Harry and cut his eyes accusingly.

“Niall,” Harry tried but Niall let out a little puff through his nose and walked away before he could say anything else.

“Harsh,” Louis commented when Niall had left and Harry was back to looking devastated once again, “Is he giving Zayn the same treatment too?”

“Probably not seeing as how Zayn hasn’t even bothered with him since last night,” Harry rolled his eyes.

“What are you gonna do?” Louis asked.

“I don’t know. What can I do? I hurt him. And I mean Zayn hurt him too but it’s not the same. We’re not the same. It’s complicated and messy and I wish it would all just fucking stop, you know?” Harry ranted.

“Can’t say I really get it since I’ve never been in a situation like that but it’ll all work itself out. You guys care about each other too much to just give it up like that,” Louis commented and Harry sincerely hoped that Niall saw it the same way that he did.

+++

Harry spent the remainder of the cooped up alone in his room (with the exception of mandatory mass and bible study) despite Louis’s offer to hang around and keep him company. Harry’d been tempted a few times to give in and go back to Louis’s room but he shut down those thoughts immediately every time, knowing it’d been those feelings that had gotten him into this situation in the first place.

Not too long after he’d gotten back from bible study, Zayn came into the room as if nothing had happened, shut the door behind him, and took a seat on Harry’s bed beside him.

“What are you doing?” Harry asked him skeptically though he made room for Zayn anyways.

“I just wanted to come check on things,” Zayn shrugged as he laid back against the headboard and put his legs over Harry’s thighs.

“Oh, so you care now?” Harry snarked.

“Harry,” Zayn sighed.

“No, Zayn. You don’t just get to pick and choose when to be a part of this based off of what’s convenient for you,” Harry said frustratedly.

“Give it up,” Zayn skinned up his face in annoyance, “Don’t act like you didn’t spend the whole day with Louis. I know you guys didn’t come to mass this morning and then you ate lunch together. You wanna talk about that?”

“That’s different,” Harry muttered.

“Is it though?” Zayn argued.

“Yeah, it is. He was being a good _friend_ after you two ditched me,” Harry said.

“Really? Thought me and Niall were your only ‘friends’ that left marks like that on your neck,” Zayn flicked one of the love bites Louis had left on the base of Harry’s neck that morning.

“Shut up,” Harry said just as the door opened again and Niall stumbled in.

“Well look at that, if it isn’t the two cheating bastards themselves,” Niall announced as he shut the door and walked farther into the room, his walk stuttered and his speech slurred, showing that he was drunk once again.

“Are you drunk?” Zayn asked as Niall went to work taking off his pants and shirt before he sat down on his bed across from them.

“Maybe,” Niall shrugged flippantly, “Do you care?”

“Of course I care,” Zayn frowned.

“ ‘Of course’,” Niall laughed, “That’s funny. Does your new boyfriend know where you are right now or are you gonna cheat on him too?”

“Liam isn’t my boyfriend,” Zayn corrected him, “And yes he knows where I am. I told him I was coming here to make sure you two were ok and hopefully fix this mess, but it’s pretty clear that’s not happening tonight with you pissed off your arse.”

“So sorry to disappoint,” Niall snarked, “I suppose now you see how it feels though, hm?”

“Goodnight Niall,” Zayn said as he shook his head and got up from Harry’s bed, “Goodnight Haz. Call if you need me but I’m not staying here if he’s gonna be like this.”

“Of course not,” Harry murmured. Zayn opened his mouth to argue as he got to the door but just said one more ‘goodbye’ as he left.

“God I fucking hate him,” Niall spat as the door shut closed again.

Harry didn’t say anything in response; he just watched Niall silently until he got up and took Zayn’s previous position on Harry’s bed. He still didn’t say anything while Niall stared back at him like he was trying to figure Harry out and then put a warm palm on Harry’s cheek and pressed their foreheads together.

Harry finally spoke, a simple “Niall,” as Niall ran his thumb up and down his cheek but Niall brought their lips together in a kiss to keep him quiet. Harry tried again when Niall pulled him in by his collar and again when Niall started to pull off his sweater but every time Niall hushed him with a kiss. Niall found his way on top of Harry, slotted in between his legs and their motions just fell into habit from there.

Niall paused briefly as he kissed his way down from Harry’s mouth to his chest, surely seeing the fading love bites Louis had left on him but he didn’t acknowledge them much after that no matter how much it made Harry’s stomach turn to know that Niall was going over the same spots Louis had been at hours earlier.

+++

Harry tried to talk to Niall again when they’d both finished and were laying together in Harry’s bed, Niall’s arms wrapped around Harry’s waist, but Niall just continued to ignore him until he finally fell asleep and Harry begrudgingly leaned over to turn off the light and reach for his phone.

He scrolled through a couple apps aimlessly until he got a text message from Louis.

**_L: Gonna assume everything’s alright since you never came by my room. Hope tomorrow goes better for you._ **

Harry sighed and clenched his jaw as Niall’s arm tightened around his waist.

**_H: not really but thanks for the support xx_ **

Louis texted him back within a minute.

**_L: you could always sleep over here._ **

And then almost immediately

**_L: Nothing dirty, just a place to sleep without having to be alone._ **

And Harry’s heart fluttered at how genuine and caring Louis was even though Harry was a dirty cheater who was lying in the arms of his sleeping sort-of-kind-of-not-really-boyfriend who was already mad at him but he was texting Louis anyways.

**_H: Can’t but I really wish I could._ **

**_L: Why can’t you?_ **

Harry sighed to himself softly.

**_H: Niall’s in my bed._ **

Louis didn’t respond as fast after that and Harry got scared that he wasn’t going to reply at all until he did a few minutes later.

**_L: so no talking. Just fucking._ **

And Harry could feel the accusatory tone even though he couldn’t hear Louis’s voice.

**_H: I’m sorry._ **

**_L: You don’t have to apologize to me, Harry._ **

**_H: Felt like I should_ **

**_L: you don’t have to_ **

**_H: are you mad?_ **

There was no reason for Louis to be mad. They weren’t together. He wasn’t Louis’s … not yet anyways. He didn’t know why he was asking and apparently neither did Louis because he didn’t indulge Harry the way he thought Louis would.

**_L: about?_ **

Harry sighed.

**_H: Louis._ **

**_L: I’m not really surprised. I knew it’d happen again eventually._ **

Harry wasn’t really sure what to say to that but Louis texted him again after a minute when he still hadn’t responded.

**_L: Well if you’re ok I’m going to bed. I’ll see you in the morning._ **

Harry wanted to keep the conversation going; was tempted to respond with _‘but what if I’m not’_  because even though he had Niall in his bed beside him, he still felt sad and alone and he didn’t feel that okay but he sent _‘goodnight Lou’_ instead, put his phone down and tried his best to go to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *comes back from war* sorry it's been so long. I've been SWAMPED with school stuff and when I'm not at school, I'm at work and shit has just been super crazy but here's the next chapter. Not too sure how I feel about it as I can't even remember when I started the draft for this but I just picked it back up the other day and worked on it throughout the week until I got to a decent stopping point. I have plans for the next chapter already and I'm going to have Thanksgiving off so the next update shouldn't take as long but I'm not going to make any promises since I still have to work on my other fic.


	4. Chapter 4

The tension and not talking stayed like that for the rest of the week and the week after that as well. The classes the boys all had together were tense; they all still sat in their usual seats together but the dynamic was definitely different from the norm and everyone noticed, even their teachers. Even though Harry and Zayn had to work on their portraits of each other for Art they still didn’t speak much and Niall was reluctant to be on any teams with Louis in PE.

Any time they had when it was optional for them to be together, they spent apart; Zayn with Liam, Harry with Louis, and Niall usually off somewhere with Josh and the music boys getting drunk. The only time Niall came around was at night to get off with Harry (though he still refused to speak to him) but he’d be gone the next morning when Harry woke up.

It wasn’t until the weekend of Niall’s birthday that the boys actually came back together for the sake of giving him at least one good weekend to make up for how shitty things had been going recently. Harry was surprised to say the least when Zayn brought Liam over to his and Louis’s table that Friday morning at breakfast since it had been nearly two weeks since any of them had even bothered with attempting to eat together.

“So Niall’s birthday is tomorrow,” Zayn announced to the table when he’d sat and taken a bite of his toast.

“We know,” Harry said for all of them. He knew he’d been aware at least and he’d mentioned it to Louis earlier that week.

“Well I’ve got plans, that like involve all of us, if you lot don’t mind. I think it’d be good if we all got back together, for this at least,” Zayn said, more to Harry than to him and Louis as a unit. Zayn didn’t really have a problem with Louis, he liked Louis actually, but it was hard to develop a genuine friendship with him when he’d already bonded and sided with Harry so much.

“I don’t mind,” Harry told him and then he looked at Louis and Louis shrugged as he took a sip of his orange juice.

“I don’t think he’d want me there though,” Louis looked at Harry and Harry frowned.

“Well I suppose he wouldn’t want me there then either,” Liam frowned at Zayn.

“No, you’re coming,” Zayn told Liam as he pet his elbow and gave him an encouraging smile.

“Zayn,” Harry said cautiously from the other side of the table and Zayn turned to look at him though he only moved his hand from Liam’s elbow to his tap on his thigh which made Liam blush and smile bashfully.

“To be completely fair, Niall is pretty upset with all of us equally across the board, Haz. And if he was going to be extra mad at anyone, it would be us. He liked Liam and Louis before all of this and I think if he just gave them another chance, he could love them,” Zayn explained, “Plus he’s going to be fucked up anyways so I doubt he’d even remember to be mad.”

“He’s been fucked up for nearly two weeks now and he’s still remembered to be hostile,” Harry snorted.

“He’s been _drunk_. This is gonna be different. I scored him some X,” Zayn smirked coyly.

“You did _what_?” Harry choked at the same time that Louis smirked and slid a hand over to congratulate Zayn with a “fucking awesome!”

“First of all, where did you even get ecstasy from?” Harry asked, bewildered.

“Does it matter?” Zayn asked back.

“Uh yeah it matters. It’ll be kind of hard to get back into Niall’s good graces if you fucking kill him with your shady ass drugs,” Harry snarked.

Zayn scoffed, “It’s not shady. I got it from Loughlin.”

“Oh yeah cause Loughlin’s definitely shade free,” Harry said sarcastically.

“Maybe I should get you some too to loosen you up, Princess,” Zayn squeezed his shoulder and Harry flinched away.

“I’m good,” Harry replied crossly.

“Hey, if the offers on the table I’d be happy to partake,” Louis smiled at Zayn and Zayn reciprocated but Liam and Harry both frowned at him.

“Of course,” Liam murmured and Louis turned to look at him.

“Is there a problem, Liam? Did you want some too?” Louis glared at him, daring him to say something.

“No, I’m good,” Liam retorted, “And you should be too.”

“Zayn offered,” Louis said.

“I didn’t actually-“ Zayn started but Louis raised his hand, keeping his eyes trained on Liam.

“Want to get on me about my drug habits too now? I mean since you can’t get on me for my liking guys anymore,” he took his eyes away from Liam to glance at Zayn and then back. Liam didn’t respond verbally, only cut his eyes at Louis like he wanted to strangle him.

“I’ll take one,” Louis turned to Zayn and Zayn nodded but Liam kicked him under the table. Zayn scoffed but Liam just glowered at him without saying anything.

“Are you taking some too?” Harry asked, more as a complaint than out of genuine concern for Zayn’s general welfare. They couldn’t all be messed up and there was no way Liam could handle all of them by himself (though Harry didn’t have any plans of taking X anyway).

“Nah,” Zayn answered, “But I’m gonna get us a bottle of Smirnoff and a few grams for a couple of blunts.”

Louis’s smile widened even more as he dapped Zayn up again, “Literally where have you been all my life, bro? You, my friend, know how to plan a good party.”

“I know, I know,” Zayn bowed his head and smiled proudly as the bell for first period rang.

 

“Nice job offering my brother drugs, Zayn,” Liam chastised him on their way to Mr. Cohen’s room after the boys had split off in their pairs from the dining hall.

“Oh come off it, Liam. He didn’t have to say yes and I didn’t even offer,” Zayn said carelessy, “What’s the big deal?”

“Ugh, forget it,” Liam muttered in pure annoyance.

 

“I didn’t know you were into that kind of stuff,” Harry commented as he and Louis walked down the hall.

“I’m pretty sure Zayn and I talked about that at dinner my first day here,” Louis reminded him.

“Yeah but you talked about weed … not pills and hard stuff like X,” Harry said cautiously.

“X isn’t ‘hard stuff’. Heroin and coke are ‘hard stuff’. Does it even make a difference?” Louis said as they walked into Mr. Cohen’s room and grabbed the corner of seats in the back.

“I suppose not but-“

“Are you saying you’ve never done drugs before? Niall drinks, Zayn smokes, and you just … do nothing?” Louis raised his brows, more out of suspicion than genuine surprise.

“I babysit them. And yeah I smoke with Zayn on the _rare_ occasion but I don’t do pills and stuff like that with him. He usually doesn’t even bother to come around when he’s messed up on shit like that because he knows I don’t like when he does that stuff,” Harry explained.

Louis let out an annoyed huff, “It would really bother you that much if I took some? Niall’s going to and it’s not fun to do stuff like that on your own.”

“No, Zayn said he’s _surprising_ Niall with some. There’s no guarantee that Niall’s even gonna actually take it,” Harry clarified.

“Well still,” Louis shrugged, “It’s no fun being high when everyone around you is sober and rotten. It’s better to have someone to buzz with.”

“And you think Niall would want to ‘buzz’ with you?” Harry asked incredulously.

“I’m sure he’s not gonna care who he’s buzzing with when he’s high,” Louis laughed as Niall ironically came in and took his seat in the back without saying a word to either of them.

+++

“Nice to see you here,” Harry said with a genuine smile as he walked into his and Niall’s room later that evening after he’d hung around in Louis’s room after dinner since he didn’t expect Niall to be in theirs.

“Mhm,” Niall muttered from his desk.

“Not planning on getting drunk with Josh and the boys tonight then?” Harry asked him.

“Nope,” Niall said curtly.

“Tommorow’s your birthday,” Harry said offhandedly from his bed.

“Yup.”

“You know, Zayn planned something for you. For all of us, actually. Well for your birthday but for all of us to participate in,” Harry told him.

“Did he,” Niall commented crassly.

“It’d be nice if you came,” Harry told him.

“Yup.”

“Could you give me _something_? Like even you just looking at me would suffice,” Harry complained from his bed on the other side of the room and Niall sighed before he turned around in his chair to face him.

“Yes, Harry?” Niall asked, annoyance sharp in his tone.

“Niall it’s been two weeks. And I’ve been _trying_. But you won’t talk to me,” Harry frowned at him.

“I wonder why,” Niall muttered under his breath as he turned his chair back around.

“ _Niall_ ,” Harry sighed.

“What, Harry? What is there for us to talk about? What do you want to talk about?” Niall asked him sharply, whipping the chair around again.

“I just want us to be okay again,” Harry said quietly.

“We’re fine, Harry,” Niall said as if the statement meant nothing to him.

“No we’re not,” Harry argued, “You’ve barely spoken more than five words at a time to me in the past two weeks. You’re always gone when I wake up. I hardly ever see you anymore and when I do you’re almost always drunk. This is not okay.”

“Can you really blame me?” Niall asked, his first instance of showing that he actually cared about the conversation.

“I don’t,” Harry said weakly, “And I know I can’t because it’s my fault but that’s why I want to fix this. We weren’t meant to be like this, Niall.”

Niall shook his head and turned around again and Harry frowned because he thought that they’d been making progress, “What? Why are you shaking your head?” Niall didn’t respond so Harry hauled himself from his bed to walk over and turn the chair around, forcing Niall to look at him, “Answer me.”

Niall glared at him but Harry refused to back down. “Why do you want to fix this?” He finally spoke and Harry’s face fell into a puzzled look.

“What do you mean ‘why’? Why _not_?”

“What’s the point? You have Louis now and Zayn has Liam and Perrie … what do you need me for Harry?” Niall shot at him and Harry backed away.

“Niall-“

“No. Tell me it’s not true. Go ahead and try to tell me that lie, Harry. I know you’ve been with him all this time,” Niall shook his head in disgust.

Harry opened his mouth to speak but he took a breath instead. “That doesn’t mean that I don’t still care about you, Niall. Because I do.”

“No you don’t,” Niall shook his head in disagreement.

“Yes I do,” Harry insisted.

“No you don’t!” Niall yelled back as he got up from the chair to get away from Harry.

“Yes I do!” Harry yelled back at him, “Stop saying that.”

“Then why did you lie to me?” Niall asked, “Why did you choose him over me if you cared so much about me Harry?”

“I never chose Louis over you-” Harry started carefully but Niall interrupted him.

“Yes you fucking did!” And the sudden wave of raw emotion in Niall’s voice and all over his face took Harry back.

“No I didn’t,” Harry said loudly in defense, “ _You_ left _me._ _You_ stopped talking to _me._ _You_ decided things should be like this. This was never my decision and I know you know that because I never would have chosen for things to play out like this if I would have had any say in it but you didn’t give me that.”

Niall swallowed and looked down like he was trying to think as he sat down on his bed and Harry took that as a sign that it was ok for him to walk closer and sit down beside him, “I never would have left you, Niall. Even when you hurt me, even when you left me, I never would have left you.”

Niall let out a hard breath and his face fell like he was trying to figure things out before he spoke again, “Did you fuck him?”

“What?” Harry replied immediately before he could process the question.

“Did you fuck him?” Niall repeated and it didn’t sound as accusatory as it did sad and resigned.

“No,” Harry said softly and he was glad that he and Louis hadn’t crossed that line so his answer was truthful.

Niall let out another sigh as he looked down at his hands in his lap before he looked up at Harry again. He put both his palms on Harry’s cheeks and Harry put his hands over Niall’s while Niall tried to read his face before he just closed his eyes, sighed, and rested his forehead against Harry’s.

“Does this mean we’re ok?” Harry asked him quietly.

“It means I’m tired,” Niall sighed, “Can we just … go to bed?”

Harry nodded and pressed a long kiss to his cheek before Niall pulled away to turn off the lamp and climbed into bed beside him.

+++

Harry woke up wrapped in warm arms and the sound of Niall’s soft snoring which came as a relief since it had felt like an eternity since Niall had actually stayed in bed with Harry until sunrise. Niall hadn’t explicitly said that things were back to normal (and Harry didn’t really expect them to be just as they’d been before) but things were at least better. Niall was at least there and that made Harry genuinely happy to wake up for the first time in weeks. It was also Niall’s birthday and Harry knew that was all anyone should care about at least for the day. All bullshit could and would be put aside for the special day.

He smirked as he rolled over and pressed a small, happy kiss beside Niall’s mouth before he crawled down under the blanket to slide down Niall’s briefs. It didn’t take much effort on Harry’s part to rouse Niall’s cock; just a slip of Harry’s tongue along the underside and a few sucking pulls around the head, before Niall’s dick was hard and he was stirring into consciousness.

“Mm, what’re ya doin there?” Niall mumbled as he waved a hand down by his thighs in search of Harry’s hair to mess about in.

Harry keened into his touch as he smiled proudly around Niall’s cock and bobbed his head down to get more of Niall into his mouth. He could tell he was doing pretty well by the way Niall dug his fingers into Harry’s scalp in praise and winced and mumbled Harry’s name until he was fully awake and actively participating in the show. 

Harry moved away for only a bit to kiss Niall’s lips when he saw that his eyes were open and trained on him but he was sure to replace his mouth with his hand immediately. He continued to stroke Niall off as he made his way down Niall’s torso with long, slow kisses that matched the pace of his steady hand on Niall’s cock. When he got to Niall’s hips, Harry was sure to leave two deep crimson lovebites that he made while his eyes were locked on Niall’s and he smiled triumphantly at what he’d done when he pulled away, his hair falling over his eyes and Niall pulling him back up for another kiss.

Harry went back down to suck him off, throwing the covers to the side so Niall could watch Harry’s full pink lips around his cock and the way his cheeks hollowed around the outline of himself in Harry’s mouth in the full light of day, and it didn’t take long before Niall was spilling his load into Harry’s mouth and Harry was swallowing down every bit.

When Harry was done he pressed his fingertips into the looming lovebites on Niall’s hips and pressed a kiss to the trail of hair below his navel before Niall pulled him up and into another kiss. It was a different kind of kiss from the ones they’d shared over the past couple weeks. Like the rest of them, it was desperate and dirty and left them breathless, but it also spoke volumes, it said things Harry knew Niall would never say with his voice.

_‘I missed you’_

_‘I love you’_

_‘Don’t leave again’_

And Harry spoke back.

_‘I missed you too’_

_‘I love you more than you know’_

_‘I never could’_

When they broke apart, Niall smiled at him and pulled him close, burying his face in Harry’s hair the way he used to, the way Harry missed, before he muttered a quiet, “Thank you.”

“Anytime,” Harry smiled back so hard his dimples popped, “Happy birthday, babe.”

“Thank you,” Niall said before he kissed Harry again.

“Mooooorning birthday boy,” Zayn cooed as he peeked his head in through the door before he walked all the way inside and shut the door behind him. He walked over and planted a long, deep kiss to Niall’s lips and it was hard to miss the twinkle in Niall’s eyes when they pulled apart. “Morning to you too, H,” Zayn smiled as he ruffled Harry’s curls.

“What’s this?” Niall asked, though the smirk on his lips showed that he definitely didn’t mind Zayn’s sudden presence.

“Hm?” Zayn hummed as he sat down in the rolling seat at Niall’s desk and Niall looked at him quizzically.

“It’s been ages since you’ve been down here, let alone kissed me and like that. What’s this?” Niall folded his arms and bit back his lips.

“Well it is your birthday innit?” Zayn smirked at him.

“Liam renting you out to me then?” Niall asked cynically.

“Do you really want to talk about Liam right now when there’s so much else we could be doing on this magnificent day?” Zayn responded with an enticing smirk.

Niall let out a little hum and raised his brows, “Like?”

“Maybe I could show you better than I can tell you, yeah?” Zayn smirked as he leaned in towards the bed and licked his lips alluringly.

“Yeah?” Niall smiled and leaned towards Zayn.

Zayn looked up and down between Niall’s eyes and lips for a moment and even Harry was starting to get into it as just a mere spectator before Zayn finally leaned in and they locked lips again. Niall raised his hands to rest on Zayn’s cheeks as Zayn got up from the chair to lay on the bed between Niall’s legs.

“Can’t jizz on me jeans ok,” Zayn mumbled as he slid his mouth down from Niall’s lips to suck a series of descending lovebites into the skin of Niall’s neck and reached a hand down to stroke at his rehardening cock.

Harry didn’t participate in the show but just spectating was entertaining enough as he watched Zayn kiss all over Niall’s mouth, throat, and chest as he continued to stroke him off until Niall came for the second time in the palm of Zayn’s hand and they were both smiling at him and the satisfied smirk splayed across Niall’s lips.

+++

The trio was late to breakfast following their bathroom shenanigans (in which Zayn and Harry both had Niall pressed up against the shower wall, taking turns sucking him off while the other one kissed him before they eventually sucked him off together until he came again). Harry could see the glint of jealousy in Louis’s eyes at the way Niall had his hand on Harry’s hip as they walked towards the table but he did a much better job of masking it than Liam who appeared visibly concerned about what all had happened since Zayn had left their room that morning.

“Happy birthday,” Louis greeted him as they sat.

“Happy birthday,” Liam parroted with a small smile.

“Thanks lads,” Niall nodded with an unhideable grin.

“Nice hickeys you’ve got there,” Louis joked and everyone laughed though his eyes went straight to Harry’s and Liam’s went to Zayn and they both shared a look.

Before anyone could respond though, Josh had come over and clapped a hand on Niall’s shoulder, “We missed you last night, bud. Where the hell were you?”

Niall swallowed as he glanced at Harry and then back at Josh, “Was in m’ room. Homework and stuff.”

Josh raised his brows skeptically but shrugged, “Well don’t think we’ve forgot it’s your birthday. Because we didn’t.”

Niall smiled, “Glad you lot remembered.”

“Yeah we remembered,” Josh smiled back, “Got you some gifts too. Come round mine tonight to get ‘em, yeah?”

“Yeah,” Niall nodded before Josh pinched his  cheek and told him happy birthday one last time before he was gone again and Harry and Zayn shared a look with raised brows first with each other and then targeted at Niall.

“Josh’s got you some presents, eh?” Zayn teased him as he pressed his face into Niall’s cheek with a hand on his knee and Niall giggled while Liam watched the exchange uncomfortably.

“Apparently,” Niall laughed as he bit into the sausage on his fork.

“Wonder what it could be,” Harry commented with a fond smile at Niall’s blush.

“Dick in a box?” Zayn teased and Niall scoffed at him while Louis, Harry, and Liam laughed.

“Could be,” Harry joked, “You two’ve been spending an awful lot of time together lately.”

“Probably not,” Niall rolled his eyes though he was still chuckling, “It’s probably a bottle or summat.”

Harry and Zayn let out synchronized little hums and the conversations moved on fairly freely from there, the tension having seemed to be magically erased as if the past two weeks hadn’t have even happened as the boys laughed and smiled with each other until the bell for first period rang.

+++

The day only continued to go well from there. Zayn and Harry showered Niall with attention and flirting all day, secret kisses from Harry here and kisses on the nose and private hand holding from Zayn there, and it made them all feel like how things had been before. Louis didn’t mind it much but Liam’s face only dragged down more and more throughout the day the longer he was forced to watch Zayn be all over someone else.

Louis tried to tell him not to take it personally but how could he not? Zayn had already coached him the day before that this was how things were going to be but it did nothing to ease his discomfort watching them together. Anyone within a mile radius could tell how Niall felt about Zayn and Harry and worse, how Zayn felt about Niall and watching it up close and personal for a whole day was torture for him. 

So much so that by the time evening had rolled around and it was time for Zayn’s birthday shenanigans for Niall, Liam was thinking of all the possible excuses he could use to avoid going.

“What are you doing?” Zayn asked as he buttoned up his shirt and looked at himself in the mirror while Liam was rolled up in his covers like a depressed burrito. Zayn looked good, it was hard to miss, but it wasn’t even for him; it was for Niall.

“ ‘m not feeling well,” Liam murmured as he rolled over in bed to face the wall despite the fact that he still wanted to marvel at Zayn.

“Bullshit,” Zayn rolled his eyes as he buttoned the cuffs of his sleeves and walked over to Liam’s bed to take a seat. “Get up, get dressed. You’re coming.”

“No,” Liam muttered.

“What do you mean ‘no’?”

“I mean no. Not going. Go have fun with the boys,” Liam said as he tried to roll away from Zayn but he put his hands on Liam’s shoulders to roll him onto his back.

“What’s this about?” Zayn asked with a concerned look on his face.

“Nothing,” Liam looked away, “Just go. Have fun.”

“Are you upset about today?” Zayn asked as if it wasn’t obvious but Liam lied anyways.

“No, Zayn. Really, everything’s ok. I’m just not in a party mood. I’d rather just chill out here,” he said.

“Are you sure?” Zayn asked. He wasn’t really convinced and Liam knew he wasn’t but Zayn knew what was going to happen that night and if Liam was already sour from the day, watching what would happen later would only make things worse.

“I’m sure. Go have fun,” Liam gave him a small smile of encouragement and Zayn returned it before he gave Liam a peck and got up to leave.

“You sure we’re ok?” Zayn asked from the doorway before he left.

“We’re good,” Liam assured him and with that, Zayn nodded and left.

+++

Louis and Harry were both already in the room by the time Zayn got there but Niall was nowhere to be found. They both greeted him from where they were sat together on Harry’s bed as he came into the room and put the bag of party favors down on Niall’s desk and sat down in his chair across the room.

“Where’s Liam?” Louis asked, taking note of his brother’s absence.

“Said he wasn’t in a party mood,” Zayn shrugged.

Harry pouted and Louis cut his eyes, “Sounds believable but I don’t think that’s why he’s not here. Did you make sure he was alright before you left?”

“Yeah,” Zayn said, “Of course. But it’s probably better off like this anyways. I don’t think he’d like being surrounded by a bunch of fucked up rowdy boys anyways.”

“Probably,” Louis relented, “I feel a bit awkward now, though.”

“Why?” Harry asked him.

“Well cause you know,” Louis said, looking Harry up and down without elaborating further.

“Well just like Zayn said yesterday, he’ll probably be too fucked up to be upset about it. And plus, you’re great. I really think Niall could look past that once he gets a chance to really get to know you,” Harry smiled and leaned in to press his forehead to Louis’s temple. Ordinarily he would’ve just kissed him but it didn’t seem right with Zayn there though he wasn’t paying attention to them because he was focusing on something on Niall’s desk. “What are you doing?”

“Rolling a blunt,” Zayn answered, still without looking at them.

“ ‘ve you got the X?” Louis asked and Zayn tossed him the bag to inspect.

“This is gonna be crazy,” Louis smiled as he got up and walked over to Niall’s desk to be closer to him, “Do you need help?”

“With what? Rolling?” Zayn asked.

“Yeah,” Louis nodded enthusiastically.

“You roll?” Zayn asked with an intrigued smile.

“Yeah,” Louis chuckled as he sat down on the desk and opened one of the gars to get out the tobacco and start rolling a second blunt.

Harry couldn’t help but smile in fondness as he watched them bond over rolling blunts together and listened to their little conversation about how long they’d both been smoking for, what drugs they’d done before, cigarettes and the like.

“You’re actually like super cool,” Zayn smiled as he pearled his blunt.

“You too,” Louis replied as he put the weed in his and Niall came into the room.

“Oi. It reeks of weed in here. Zayn must be in,” Niall joked as he closed the door behind him and gave a Harry a routine peck with a ruffle to his hair and walked over to his desk where Louis was finishing up the second blunt.

“Zayn is in,” Zayn confirmed as he kissed Niall’s jaw.

“Birthday blunts for me?” Niall asked with a grin.

“No. Well we can save one for later, I guess. But I got you something even better,” Zayn told him and Louis pulled out the bag with two little blue ecstasy pills inside with a mischievous grin.

“What’s this?” Niall asked, his voice laced with excitement and a trace of concern as he held up the bag to look at its contents more closely.

“Ecstacy,” Zayn told him with an eager grin.

“You got me ecstasy?” Niall asked.

“Yep,” Zayn smiled, “But don’t worry. It’s completely safe and Harry and I are gonna be here all night with you to make sure everything goes ok.”

“Well why are there two?” Niall questioned.

“Lou’s gonna take one with you so you’re not tripping by yourself,” Harry explained as he walked over closer towards the rest of them. Niall looked between the three of them suspiciously.

“I think it’d be a good way for you two to bond, getting high together,” Zayn commented, “Louis’s actually really great.”

“I am,” Louis agreed.

“I bet,” Niall commented sarcastically, “Where’s Liam?”

“He wasn’t in a party mood but he sends his best regards,” Zayn told him.

“Hm,” Niall hummed, “Well Carpe Diem, I suppose. Let’s get this party started.”

They all cheered as Harry got Niall and Louis water bottles and they put the pills on their tongues. Harry snapped a photo of them, tongues out with their arms around each other’s necks for ‘memory’s sake’ before they took gulps from their waters and swallowed.

“Let the night begin boys,” Zayn announced with a devious smirk on his lips.

+++

A blunt and three quarters of a Smirnoff bottle later, they were all trashed and leaning all over each other as they danced to whatever Zayn’s Pandora played. Just as Zayn had predicted, Niall was far too faded to remember to be upset with them. He was actually happier than Zayn or Harry had seen him in a while and he and Louis were getting on exceptionally well.

Upon Harry’s suggestion, they all ended up sitting in a circle with the near empty bottle of Smirnoff on the ground spinning between them. Harry was the first to have a go, his spin ending on Niall and they shared a steamy kiss though it was nothing monumental. Zayn was next with his spin landing on Harry. Their kiss was nothing major pretty routine actually but it was something since it’d been weeks since they’d kissed each other.

“Marvelous innit?” Niall elbowed Louis from across the circle and Louis nodded his agreement.

“Pretty fucking hot I’d say,” Louis licked his lips.

“Oi settle down you two,” Harry slurred when they broke apart and he patted Louis’s thigh.

Louis was the next to spin and it landed on Zayn. Louis blushed and Zayn smirked as he made a ‘come here’ motion with his finger. Louis was hesitant in the kiss at first but Zayn picked his chin up with his hand and pulled him further into it as he slipped his tongue into Louis’s mouth and Louis put his hands on Zayn’s cheeks.

Niall and Harry both hooped and hollered as their kiss went further until Louis backed away and sat back on his haunches, breathless.

“How was it?” Harry asked in a laugh at the flush on Louis’s cheeks as he pointed an imaginary microphone at him.

“He’s actually a magnificent kisser,” Louis commented as he tried to catch his breath.

“Well thank you,” Zayn smiled, “You’re not too bad yourself.”

“Do you know you two are the only ones in the room who haven’t kissed?” Harry pointed at Louis and Niall, not even bothering to hide the obvious fact that he and Louis had kissed before that night.

“It’s true,” Zayn conceded, “Go on. You’re both pretty good at it. You should have a go.”

Louis raised his brows and Niall shrugged as he leaned in and planted his lips on Louis’s. The kiss wasn’t much at first but it quickly turned into a battle for dominance and Louis ended up on top of Niall with Niall stretched out beneath him with his legs bent around Louis’s hips and Louis’s hands pinning down Niall’s wrists.

“Oi, you boys need a room?” Harry barked as he pulled on the waist of Louis’s jeans but neither one of them backed down. In fact, Louis proceeded to undo the fly of Niall’s jeans and get his pants down low enough to sneak out his cock.

“Jesus Christ,” Harry muttered when they still didn’t stop.

“Welp they did say E’s the love drug,” Zayn joked and elbowed Harry as they watched Niall and Louis both continue to strip down with their tongues down each other’s throats.

“You boys just gonna stand around watching or are you gonna join the show?” Niall teased with his eyes trained on the both of them as Louis made his way down from Niall’s kiss-swollen lips to his hard and leaking cock. Zayn and Harry both shared a look before they licked their lips and made their way towards where the two other boys were sprawled out on the floor.

“This ok with you, Lou?” Harry asked though Louis was a bit preoccupied with Niall’s cock in his mouth.

He pulled off and nodded with a shrug, “Yeah. Carpe Diem or whatever. Come here.” He pulled Harry into a kiss with their hands both wrapped around Niall’s cock while Zayn was leaned over Niall in their own kiss.

Soon enough they were all bare, caught up in a tangled mess of arms, legs, cocks, kisses, lube and spit. Niall was pressed deep into Zayn for the first time in months while Louis fucked into Harry for their first time ever. It wasn’t as romantic as either of them had imagined it would be (and neither of them would have ever guessed that it would have happened with Zayn and Niall right beside them) but they were both fucked up and warm and though it wasn’t ideal, it was good, great even. Zayn had Harry underneath him at one point while Louis kissed him and Niall sucked Harry off while he stroked Louis’s cock. Niall also got his turn with Harry while Louis took his previous position sucking Harry off while he stroked off Zayn.

They all used each other, they moved fluidly and there was no restraint or hesitation from anyone. The four of them fucked the way Zayn, Harry, and Niall used to before Louis and Liam came but with an extra body and they all enjoyed themselves equally. It was nice to be back and for the first time in weeks they just let themselves feel without thinking.

Louis was the first one to come with Harry underneath him, followed by Niall when he’d also had his last go with Harry. Harry came next with Louis’s swollen lips around his cock, leaving Zayn the last one to finish into Niall. By the time they’d all started to come down, they were tired and boneless, panting on the floor and speechless.

“I can’t believe we just fucked on the floor,” Harry barked, breaking the silence and causing all of them to break into a unanimous fit of laughter.

“I can’t believe that just happened at all,” Louis laughed as he rolled over to lay on top of him while Zayn had Niall pulled on top of his lap.

“That was … something,” Niall chuckled.

“Innit,” Zayn smirked and kissed his temple as Niall took in a yawn that Harry reciprocated, “Tired, boys?”

“A bit,” Harry nodded as he rested his head on Louis’s shoulder.

“Think I’m coming down,” Niall rubbed his hair into Zayn’s neck.

“Want to smoke the last blunt before we sleep?” Zayn offered.

“Oi but then we have to put on clothes and get up,” Louis complained.

“It’ll help with the come down,” Zayn assured him as he patted Niall’s thigh and slid out from beneath him to get up and start tossing the boys’ boxers to their rightful owners. “And if H is feeling generous all we need are jumpers and we’re good to go.”

“Fine,” Harry complied, too tired and drunk to argue, “But you’re doing my laundry.”

“Fine,” Zayn smiled as he grabbed the blunt and his pack of cigs and opened the door for the boys to tiptoe into the hall. Niall was the last one out and Zayn walked him out with a hand on his waist with Harry and Louis walking shoulder-to-shoulder together in front of them.

 

“Thanks for today. It was great,” Niall smiled as he exhaled and passed the blunt to Zayn.

“No problem,” Zayn returned the smile and gave him a small peck.

“You boys too,” Niall said to Louis and Harry, “I want to say it was unforgettable but I’ve got a feeling my memory’s going to be a bit spotty in the morning.” They all laughed.

“Well I’m glad you let me be a part of it,” Louis smiled at him.

“Same. You’re actually really cool. Not that I ever thought you weren’t but you know,” Niall glanced at Harry as Zayn passed Louis the blunt.

“So you two are good then?” Harry asked and they shared a look before they shrugged and Louis passed Niall the blunt.

“Bros?” Louis suggested and Niall laughed as he slung an arm over Louis’s shoulders in agreement.

“Bros who smoke together and fuck together, stay together.”

When the blunt was done, Niall and Harry went back inside to get the beds pushed together so they could all go to sleep while Zayn and Louis stayed outside to smoke cigarettes.

“Enjoyed yourself tonight then?” Zayn asked with a mischievous grin and snicker.

“Yeah, it was pretty interesting,” Louis grinned, “You boys sure know how to party.”

“Can I ask you something?” Zayn said as he flicked the ashes of his cig into the grass and Louis nodded. “What’s the deal with you and Haz?”

“What do you mean?” Louis asked as he blew out a stream of smoke before he flicked his ashes.

“I mean like are you guys together?” Zayn elaborated.

“What, like you and my brother?” Louis joked and Zayn let out a little laugh, “I like him, yeah. And I think he likes me too but we’re not together. How could we be?”

“What do you mean?” Zayn asked as he took a drag on his cig.

“He loves Niall. He doesn’t say it but he doesn’t have to. It’s written all over his face,” Louis shrugged noncommittally and Zayn was amazed that he could say it so nonchalantly like it wasn’t a blow to the ego. “Can I ask _you_ a question?”

“Yeah?”

“What’s the deal with you and my brother?”

Zayn pushed his cheek out with his tongue and flicked the ashes off his cig again before he took another drag and exhaled, “I like him. He likes me. But it’s kind of the same situation, I suppose.”

“You don’t seem like you’ve had as hard a time giving him up as Harry though,” Louis commented.

“And how would you know?” Zayn asked a bit more sharply than he’d meant to.

“Because Harry told me,” Louis said, “But it’s not really my business. I don’t care about that.”

“Then why did you ask?”

“Because Liam’s my little brother. You seem like a cool guy and I like you, Zayn, I do, but you can’t just play him the way I’ve heard you do other people. He’s a sweet, genuine kid that’s been through enough. He doesn’t deserve that,” Louis told him. He had a cordial smile on his face the whole time that he spoke but Zayn could tell that he was serious.

Zayn was definitely taken aback by the way Louis sounded when he talked about Liam, though. From everything Liam had complained about when it came to Louis, he’d built Louis up to be an irresponsible demon but it was a completely different image from the concerned big brother sitting beside him. He genuinely cared about Liam and it made Zayn’s stomach turn.

“I care about Liam,” Zayn told him and he meant it, “I really really like him. And I want him, like in a real proper relationship kind of way but there’s so much I have to get through before I could ever have that, you know?”

“Yeah,” Louis nodded hesitantly.

“I won’t hurt him though,” Zayn went on, “Or I’ll try not to, at least.”

“You gonna tell him about tonight?” Louis asked and Zayn looked down.

“I suppose I haven’t got much of a choice,” Zayn sighed as he put out his cigarette and flicked the butt towards the lake.

“Integrity,” Louis commented as he put out his own cigarette.

“Yeah,” Zayn stood and reached out a hand to help Louis up.

“But whatever happens, I’m glad tonight happened. You’re great,” Louis told him as they walked back inside.

Harry and Niall were already fast asleep when they got back to the room. Louis shucked off Harry’s borrowed jumper and curled into bed in front of him while Zayn climbed into bed behind Niall.

“You’re great too,” Zayn finally said before they both fell asleep.


	5. Chapter 5

By the time Harry woke up, Niall and Zayn were both gone but there was a different warm, little body that he was wrapped around. It took him a moment to realize that it was Louis and then his mind started to race because they were both naked and in Harry’s bed. He almost started to panic before flashes of the night before started to hit him.

They’d slept together. In this room. With Niall present and participating along with Zayn. Not only that but they’d literally _slept_ together as well; Louis in Harry’s arms and Harry wrapped up in Niall’s.

He was pulled from his thoughts when Louis let out a soft and sleepy little mewl and turned over in his arms, rubbing at his eyes before he started to blink them open.

“Uh, Louis,” Harry spoke softly but his throat still felt way too dry and scratchy.

“Hm,” Louis hummed gently, still not fully awake.

“It’s Harry.”

Louis let out a little chuckle but he immediately raised a palm to his temple, “Christ my head is pounding. But I figured as much, Haz.”

“Just uh, making sure,” Harry mumbled awkwardly, “Are you awake?”

Louis let out another little laugh, his ribs brushing against Harry’s chest as he turned over again to lay his back on the bed, “Kind of.” He could feel Harry’s radiant smile without even having to turn to look at him and he couldn’t help but to mirror it with a small smile of his own.

“You’re cute when you’re sleepy,” Harry complimented him, propping his chin on his folded hands while he admired Louis. Louis reached over and twirled his finger around one of Harry’s curls, letting the ringlet fall down over his forehead.

“Your voice is cute when you first wake up,” Louis complimented him back.

“Do you know this was our first sleepover?” Harry asked softly with a small grin.

“I do know,” Louis smiled back at him, “I’d say it was quite nice.”

“I agree,” Harry smiled even harder with his dimples making a timely appearance. Louis stubbed his thumbs into them and lifted up Harry’s cheeks into an even bigger smile. Harry’s eyes traveled from the luminescent blues of Louis’s to his thin pink lips and back more than a few times and Louis took the hint to lean over and give him a kiss. It was soft and gentle, Harry taking Louis’ bottom lip between both of his and Louis nipping down gently at Harry’s plush lower one before Harry gave himself a bit of leverage, pushing himself up on the palms of his hands and leaning more into the kiss with both of Louis’s tiny hands cupping his cheeks. They didn’t break apart until it was absolutely necessary because breathing in each other in place of oxygen could only suffice for so long but when they did they were still smiling goofily at each other.

“So you had fun with us last night then?” Harry asked, brushing his thumb softly over Louis’s hip.

“Yeah, I did,” Louis answered, his eyes following Harry’s finger.

“Good, that’s good,” Harry bit his lip a bit, “I was kind of nervous that you’d be uncomfortable with all of us but you seemed to really get on with them.”

Louis let out a little breath through his nose, “Why were you nervous? I’m not a virgin.”

“I know,” Harry took his gaze from Louis’s hip to meet his eyes, “But having sex with one person is different than having sex with three. Especially when they’ve all slept together before and you haven’t been with any of them. I just didn’t want you to- you know- feel weird or pressured or anything.”

“I didn’t, Harry,” Louis assured him, wrapping a curl around his finger again, “I had a good time.”

“Good,” Harry smiled again, “Well breakfast then?” Louis nodded his agreement before they got up from the bed to get ready for breakfast.

+++

Zayn and Niall had gone down to Zayn’s room together to collect Liam on their way to breakfast. Liam was a bit guarded towards them initially but he did his best to remain cordial through breakfast though he still stayed a bit more quiet than usual. Though he didn’t know about _everything_ that had happened the night before (and he wasn’t sure if he wanted to), he at least had a vague idea of what had probably happened and was wracked with curiosity about the rest. They were still in the dining hall by the time Louis and Harry got down so the pair joined them at the table where they all shared the usual round of good mornings as Louis and Harry sat down at the table.

“So we were just talking about what we wanted to do for our activity today,” Niall informed them as he reached over and took a strip of bacon from Harry’s plate.

“Oi,” Louis let out a groan, “How could you want to do anything but curl up in bed for the rest of the day? Do you not feel like complete shit after last night?”

Niall let out a little chuckle, “I’m Irish, Lou. We don’t get hangovers.”

“Explains why you were up and out of the room so early,” Harry commented as he picked up a forkful of his eggs.

“I was hungry. Plus you had company, I’m sure you were just fine,” Niall told him, his eyes not so subtly crossing to Louis before going back to Harry.

“Anyways our options for today are canoeing, a mountain bike trail, or hiking,” Zayn informed them, putting the conversation back on course.

“Definitely not canoeing,” Louis blanched at just the mere thought of being in a rocking boat.

“Biking sounds a bit too intense too,” Harry said.

“So hiking then?” Zayn asked.

They all nodded or shrugged their agreement and designated Niall to be the one to sign them up for the 3pm group with Mrs. Gallagher.

+++

There were four other boys that ended up accompanying them on the hiking trip and they all let out petulant snickers when the five of them showed up together and late. Niall had an ever present hand on Harry’s waist because he’d never cared about people’s opinion on who he fucked. Zayn and Liam walked shoulder to shoulder, Zayn with his head held high and Liam with his gaze down on his feet because he was still feeling a bit reserved since he and Zayn hadn’t talked yet. Louis walked as the frontman of the pack and greeted the others with the brightest of shit-eating grins he could pull off. “Something funny lads?” He sneered at the laughing boys.

The other boys didn’t respond to him. They either swallowed or cut their eyes with slight annoyance before turning away to look at Mrs. Gallagher.

“Alright is everyone here now then?” Mrs. Gallagher asked before she called off the roll of everyone that had signed up and ticked off their names. When she’d made sure that they were all present, she went through making sure that they were all in the appropriate attire of either hiking boots or running shoes at the least and had a bottle of water handy. When she was assured that they were all ready, she clapped her hands together and turned to lead them off for the 8km hike.

The boys started off centered together in a clump, talking and breathing proving simple enough but by the time that they’d reached the 3km mark, they’d all started to fall into different heats. Liam had abandoned Zayn once they’d reached the 1km mark and he’d started to fall behind in favor of taking in nature and walking by himself though Harry tried to pull him into his and Niall’s conversation every now and again since he was walking within earshot. Niall’s hand was now clasped in Harry’s which Harry had to use to haul Niall along every so often when he started to drag behind a bit. Zayn and Louis on the other hand had fallen to the very back of the group and had to stop every couple of minutes to take short breaks until they couldn’t see the group anymore and then resumed walking.

By the time they’d reached the 4km mark, Mrs. Gallagher had agreed to let them have a brief five minute break. They were all flushed and breathless for the most part with the exception of Liam.

“All this panting kinda reminds me of last night,” Niall joked as he squeezed a stream of water into his mouth from his bottle suggestively with a wink and the boys all laughed though Liam’s was more hesitant and he stuffed his mouth with trail mix and took a sip of his own water uncomfortably.

“I must say, you do look quite nice all pink and breathless even in the daylight,” Louis murmured with a small smile at Harry and couldn’t help but poke his index finger into his dimple.

“So do you,” Harry agreed and tugged gently on Louis’s belt loop.

“What about me,” Niall pouted petulantly and they giggled. Harry only indulged him with a squeeze to his hand and a playful bite on his neck as he nuzzled into Niall’s glistening skin. “Much better,” Niall smirked with satisfaction.

“You know I gotta say for this to have been your idea, you’re doing a bit poorly on this hike, Zayn,” Louis commented and Zayn let out a puff through his nose.

“Please, you’ve been in the back gasping for air right beside me, Louis,” Zayn called him out and they all laughed again.

“Maybe if you cut down on the cigs and blunts you wouldn’t be so out of breath,” Niall suggested but they all laughed again because they knew it would never happen.

“Why’re you so quiet up there, Li?” Louis called up to him. Liam took his water bottle down from his lips to glance around at all of them quickly with a small shrug.

“Yeah, you have been really quiet,” Niall agreed and Liam shrugged again.

“Just kinda tired,” Liam said quietly and turned back to look at Mrs. Gallagher who was prepping the group to start moving again. Harry and Zayn shared a look and Louis turned to look at Zayn warily.

Zayn didn’t have it in him to try and maintain a conversation while they hiked the remaining 4k but when they’d reached the top of the mountain and Mrs. Gallagher gave them time to admire the view for themselves, he immediately went to find Liam. The mountain top wasn’t that big so it didn’t take long to find where he was sitting on the edge by the trees, his gaze out on where the lake was glimmering up from beneath them. Zayn approached cautiously and took a seat quietly, keeping his hands and feet to himself even though he was more than tempted to wrap an arm around Liam’s hunched shoulders. Liam turned and met him with a small smile but Zayn could see the glint of sadness there, no matter how hard he tried to hide it behind the furtive grin.

“Hey,” Zayn murmured, a private smile with the intent to comfort splayed on his lips.

“Hi,” Liam responded and looked back down at the lake below.

“It’s beautiful up here, innit?” Zayn said, following Liam’s gaze down to the lake.

“Yeah,” Liam nodded, “The lake looks even better from up here. I’d love to see what it looks like at night.”

Zayn nodded but he didn’t respond. He was quiet until Liam turned to look at him again. “What’s wrong?” He asked gently.

“I’m ok,” Liam nodded at the lake again, not meeting Zayn’s eyes. Zayn furrowed his brows and slipped a hand under Liam’s chin to make him meet his eyes. Zayn’s eyes scanned over his face, the _‘no you’re not’_ going unspoken by his lips but his eyes communicated enough for Liam to get the message and try to look away again.

He let out a soft defeated sigh. “Part of me wants to know what happened last night, even though I’ve got a feeling I already know enough. But the other part of me doesn’t want to. I don’t know,” he shrugged. “I’m dumb-“

“No,” Zayn shook his head and looked at him thoughtfully, moving his hand from Liam’s chin to take a soft hold on his arm. “No, you’re not. I’ll tell you if you want to know.” Liam squinted his eyes and looked up at him again, the worry obvious in his eyes. Zayn was the one to look away this time.

“We got drunk, smoked,” he took a deep breath, “Some stuff happened.”

“I figured it would,” Liam nodded and looked away.

“Please don’t be mad,” Zayn said quietly, the knots in his stomach an unfamiliar sensation because he’d never been quite this concerned about someone being disappointed in him before.

Liam shook his head, licking his lips. He opened his mouth to speak but had to lick his lips again before he could manage words, “I knew it would happen. That’s why I didn’t want to go.”

“There’s more though,” Zayn spoke softly, his eyes trained on the lake again while Liam turned to look at him.

“What more could there be?” He asked, the fear wavering in his voice edging up Zayn’s nerves even more.

Zayn looked up at him, his eyes scanning over Liam’s face so he’d have a mental image of what Liam looked like before Zayn broke him. To be fair, he should have did this before he’d really hurt Liam, when he was actually happy and he didn’t have to be afraid of Zayn hurting him even though that fear had always been there since the day they’d met in some way or another.

“Louis and I kissed,” Zayn said, his voice barely reaching above a whisper and he had to close his eyes momentarily when he saw Liam’s face starting to crumple, “It didn’t mean anything. It was in Spin the Bottle but then,” he took in a sharp breath, “It turned into more. Not me and him but all of us. I didn’t- we didn’t do anything more together, Louis and I, he was more with Harry but,” he cut himself off shaking his head, “I don’t know. It wasn’t a big deal or anything but I figured I should be honest or whatever.”

Liam clenched his jaw, swallowing and Zayn could see the sharp bobble of his Adam’s apple. “I hope you’re not mad. It really didn’t mean anything, Liam, I swear.”

Liam shrugged his shoulder, doing his best to fake nonchalance but Zayn saw right through it. “You said it didn’t mean anything, right? Just kissing, a little sex. Whatever.” Lies. Zayn knew it was probably eating at him but who was he to press the issue if Liam didn’t want him to?

“Ok,” Zayn nodded, “Ok. Well- um, I’m glad we talked. I’ll uh- yeah,” he stammered, giving Liam an awkward pat on his back before he started to stand up. Normally he would have just walked away from the situation (and part of him wanted to) but of course he couldn’t do that with Liam because Liam made him break all of his own rules.

Instead, he reached a hand out to help Liam up and the way Liam looked up at him, all innocent hazel eyes and pink lips pulled between his teeth with his brows furrowed because he was still a bit confused and irritated shouldn’t have turned Zayn on but it did. Liam swallowed again as he took Zayn’s hand in his and stood. Zayn held on to his hand a beat longer than necessary which made Liam’s face finally split into a smile and Zayn couldn’t keep himself from wrapping an arm around Liam any longer. He indulged himself, pressing his forehead into Liam’s neck as he snaked an arm around his slight waist with a smile of his own on his lips.

 

 

“Didn’t know there was a good view from back here,” Harry mocked, with a slight smirk as he sidled up to where Louis had taken to lying back on a rock, his elbows back behind him and his feet flat on the rock.

“My feet hurt and my arse is sore,” Louis whined as he made space for Harry to sit beside him.

“Oh stop you’re whining,” Harry rolled his eyes as he sat, “You didn’t face three cocks last night.”

Louis couldn’t help but laugh which made Harry laugh too.

“Fair point but it’s only one more than you’re used to so I don’t feel _that_ bad for you,” Louis smirked and Harry rolled his eyes though the smile on his face gave him away. He could feel Louis’s eyes on him but when he decided to look back, Louis’s gaze had shifted to somewhere in front of them. Harry followed his eyes until he found what he was watching and relaxed back into the rock.

“You know I’ve never seen him like this until your brother,” Harry commented offhandedly. Louis had a small smile of satisfaction on his lips as he watched where Liam and Zayn were sat down at the edge of the cliff talking and he didn’t take his eyes off of them.

“Not even with you and Niall?” Louis asked, eyes still on the pair.

“Not like that,” Harry answered with a slight shake of his head, “All genuine and pure and innocent.” And it was true. There’d been no need to. There was no chase, no dates or hand holding. No longing eyes and pure intentions or lusty crushes. One day Zayn, Niall, and Harry were friends and the next they were sharing beds and blowjobs at night. Well maybe it hadn’t happened quite as instantaneously as that; there’d been sexual tension and crude remarks traded back and forth but the point was that it wasn’t like what Zayn had with Liam. Harry couldn’t decide if he was more jealous or happy for them but he decided to go with the latter, his choice made all the easier when he saw the genuine joy in Louis’s eyes from watching them. “Funny, I never really pegged you as the hopeless romantic type.”

Louis scoffed, “I’m not.” Harry quirked his brow skeptically and he could tell Louis could feel it even if he wasn’t looking at him. “I’m just happy for him is all. He deserves to be happy,” he said and his gaze finally wavered as he looked down, biting his lip.

Harry furrowed his brows, looking from Louis to Liam and Zayn and back at Louis. “You deserve to be happy too, Louis,” Harry reminded him carefully.

“I know,” Louis finally looked at Harry for the first time since they’d started talking about Liam and Zayn. “You too. Niall, everyone does.”

“Yeah,” Harry agreed a bit confusedly.

 “It’s just different you know,” Louis said, taking his eyes away from Harry again.

“What do you mean?” Harry asked.

“Just- I don’t know. Sometimes I wish I could be like that again, like Liam. All hopeless romantic bumbling idiot that believes in true love and going on dates and all that crap. Young and fresh and virginal where you still think sex is about love and love is about being happy and not knowing what it feels like to have it all ripped away from you to be left with just a broken heart,” he shrugged, “I don’t know. It’s stupid and disgusting, sorry.”

“No,” Harry shook his head earnestly, “I get it, I totally do. I know what it’s like to want that and what it feels like when you realize you can’t have it anymore. I get it.”

Louis’s gaze was back on the pair of them again, “Part of me really wants to stop it, you know? I know I don’t know Zayn too well but I’m scared for Liam. He still has that hope, that innocence and I want him to be able to keep it forever. Fuck, I wish I could protect it for him because he doesn’t even fucking know it’s something he’ll want to protect yet but I can’t because stopping the chance of pain stops the chance of happy too.”

“Yeah,” Harry nodded breathlessly, eyes on the boys again.

Louis turned to look at him for a second, his eyes scanning Harry’s profile before he looked at Liam and Zayn again. “Would you go back if you could?”

“What?” Harry asked, turning to look at Louis again.

“Go back to being a virgin, believing in love,” Louis clarified.

“I still do,” Harry murmured, his brows creasing a bit. “Do you not?” Louis licked his lips and looked away. “You don’t?” Harry asked, his voice catching just a bit at the end.

“Of course I do,” Louis said quietly, his eyes still not meeting Harry’s. “I just- don’t think it’ll happen to me. I believe it can happen for other people; that it can be something real and genuine for someone else. Just not for me.”

Harry swallowed the protest that had started to climb its way up his throat. He wanted to argue, to tell Louis that he loved him but he didn’t know that. He looked down, retreating back into his own thoughts because shit. Had his fling with Niall and Zayn made him forget what it felt like to be in real love? Of course he loved them but their relationship had never been about love. It was sex, lust. Convenience. Zayn’s words rang in his head ‘ _We’re here because we want to be. We can walk away anytime we want to’_. Just convenient sex. So he swallowed down his protest and when Mrs. Gallagher started clapping her hands for the group to gather around for a picture before they went back down he stayed quiet.

But as they got in place for the photograph, Liam, Zayn, and Niall falling in line beside him on his left with his arm around Louis on his right, watching as Louis stood on his tip toes so he wouldn’t look so short amongst the others and the beautiful curve of his lips as he smiled, Harry thought that maybe, just maybe even if he couldn’t recreate that pure, innocent, unbroken kind of love that Louis longed for, maybe if he tried hard enough, the kind of love that he _was_ able to give could be enough for him one day.

+++

“Do you believe in love?” Harry inquired after Niall had leaned over him to turn off the lamp that night in bed. Zayn had opted to spend the night in his room with Liam and Louis had gone back to his own room after playing Fifa with some of the other boys in the Rec room.

“Jesus Christ, Haz please don’t tell me you think you’re falling in love with me,” Niall groaned as he put his face in his hands.

“Oh fuck off,” Harry scoffed with a shove to Niall’s shoulders.

“I mean I wouldn’t be surprised if you were! I think I’m a pretty good lay and I’m not too hard on the eyes either,” Niall smirked and Harry shoved him again but laughed this time and gave him a light peck on the chin.

“No, Niall, I am not bloody in love with you,” Harry assured him, “I love you but I can’t imagine ever marrying you one day.”

“You sure about that?” Niall waggled his eyebrows suggestively, “Don’t think anyone will ever be able to fuck you quite like I do and I think I’m a pretty good time in general as well.”

“You are,” Harry conceded, “But I’d have to live in the kitchen to put out as much food as you eat and I’d always have to stay covered up to hide the bruises and bites you always leave me with.”

“Don’t act like you don’t love them,” Niall smirked as he flicked a looming lovebite on one of Harry’s hips. Harry bit his lip and leaned over to kiss Niall once more. It was open and smiley, Harry’s tongue grazing over Niall’s lower lip and Niall nipping at Harry’s.

“Why do you ask though?” Niall inquired when they finally pulled apart.

“I don’t know,” Harry shrugged as he ran a hand through Niall’s hair, “I was just talking to Louis earlier and he got me thinking about it.”

Niall let out a little puff of air and rolled his eyes, “What, do you think you’re in love with him now?”

“No,” Harry denied before he could think it over, “He just made an interesting point. Like looking at the way Zayn and Liam are with each other, all sweet and innocent, do you ever wish you had that? That like- we were like that, all of us?”

“God no,” Niall screwed up his face in disgust, “They’re gross to watch, all the puppy dog eyes and hand holding.”

“Are you just saying that because you wish it were you?” Harry joked and Niall glowered at him.

“No, I’m saying that because it _is_ gross. I can’t believe Zayn has even lasted this long,” Niall answered.

“I’m kinda surprised by it too,” Harry admitted, “But maybe he just really likes Liam that much.”

Niall rolled his eyes and let out another laugh, “Yeah, maybe.”

“You can’t say it’s not real,” Harry furrowed his brows at Niall’s flippant tone.

“I didn’t. I just think Zayn is a greedy bastard who takes what he wants and then moves on. Can’t say I’ve ever seen ‘im work this hard for a fuck before but then again you and I weren’t exactly traditional and I doubt Ms. Perrie Princess was playing too hard to get either,” Niall shrugged.

“How cynical of you,” Harry frowned as he laid down and Niall wrapped his limbs around him.

“Oh baby Haz don’t get upset. The moral of the story is that love is real and it’s out there. You’ll find it one day. And hell, if you don’t, I’d always marry you,” Niall comforted him with a kiss to the shell of his ear.

Harry couldn’t help but smile and turn over in Niall’s arms to press his face to the warm skin of his chest.

“I love you, Niall,” Harry mumbled softly.

“I love you too, Harry,” Niall muttered back with a kiss to Harry’s curls before they both started to drift off into sleep.


	6. Chapter 6

“Why’re we here,” Niall grumbled into Harry’s shoulders as he shifted around in the uncomfortable auditorium seat that Friday morning after they’d all been summoned for an 8 am announcement.

“Yeah,” Louis muttered from his seat beside Zayn, “Couldn’t they have just said whatever they had to say over the PA system?”

“Would you two stop whining,” Harry rolled his eyes, “At least we’re missing class.”

“Barley,” Niall muttered.

“Good morning students! How nice it is to see all of your bright and shining faces this fantastic Friday morning. How’re you lot doing?” Nick greeted as he took to the stage and looked around at the grumbling students in the auditorium. Despite how tense things had been between them lately, Harry couldn’t help but to smirk as he watched Nick on stage. He had to admit that although Nick could be a royal dick when he wanted to play Headmaster, he was still quite the charmer. It had been what had drawn Harry to him in the first place. Their response was low and guttural but Nick took it and continued.

“As you lot know, or may not know, having a strong relationship with our sponsors is an integral part of keeping the school up and running which is why we like to take every opportunity possible to show them our gratitude by promoting student excellence and showing them what their money is going to.”

“So kissing their asses basically?” Louis muttered to the boys crossing his arms with an annoyed flick of his hair as he darted out his tongue to lick his lips, just catching Harry’s gaze.

“Something like that,” Zayn murmured back.

“As per usual, they’ll be treating us by putting on the annual Fall Carnival at the end of October and we will repay them with the annual Sponsor celebration at the end of December right before Christmas break but we need to start preparing now because we want each and every single one of you to be involved this year.” The crowd let out a unanimous groan. “Hey now, without these people’s funding there would be no Calvary Creek.”

“And would that really be the worst thing?” Louis sneered.

“Definitely because then you never would’ve met me,” Harry replied with a smirk. Louis turned to look at him with a small smile of his own, biting his lip.

“I can assure you all that you are going to love this celebration because we’re going to have something for everyone. The art students are going to compose their best pieces for the gallery. The athletes are going to hold charity games-“ Nick was cut off by a hand shooting up in the air.

“But what about the rest of us, Headmaster Grimashaw?” Taylor York asked, “What about the kids that aren’t creative and athletic? What about the brains? There’s never anything for us.”

“I assure that there will be something for everyone,” Nick said. “For everyone else that does not participate on an athletic team or is in Advanced Art or Music, we will have the play.” Another groan from the crowd.

“But this year we are partnering up with our sister school, Canterbury Cross, so that we can really ‘bring the thunder’ this go around,” Nick announced and the crowd finally let out a cheer. “And our play this year will be- drumroll,” all of the boys started to pat on their knees in anticipation and excitement, “Romeo and Juliet! Auditions will be held exactly one week from now in this auditorium and just so that you all can be on the same caliber, all of your English classes will begin reading the play starting today.”

Harry could see out of his peripherals the way that Louis immediately sat up in his seat, grin on his face and hands folded under his chin in anticipation as he listened to Nick go on.

“We encourage everyone to audition and anyone that does not get a major role will still be able to help out. If you want to be on stage you can play as an extra or be in the Chorus. Everyone else will help with the background stuff like lighting, sound, and set design.”

“So exactly how strict are you going to be about this whole ‘everyone is participating’ thing?” Matty Healy asked and it earned a few snickers from the crowd.

“Well anyone caught not helping out, lazing around, slacking off, or purposefully trying to bring down the celebration will be given demerits. And do you know how demerits will be served, Matthew?” Nick asked with a coy smirk. There was a brief pause. “Set design. Everyone and I mean, _everyone_ is going to help out and have fun.”

“Now that being said, I expect all of you to be on your best behavior in the presence of our company. The girls will also be at the Fall Carnival as per usual so you’ll have some time to find a nice bird before the Winter Formal which will also be held in December. But there is to be no funny business or inappropriate behavior! All touching needs to be limited, kept above the neck, and you need to leave room for Jesus,” Nick warned and the crowd laughed.

“Well, that about wraps it up. You all are good to go on to your classes now. Enjoy the rest of your day,” Nick closed and started to walk off stage as the boys started to file out of the auditorium.

“I don’t know about you boys, but I couldn’t be more fucking pumped for this!” Louis exclaimed as they went through the auditorium doors and he started to literally bound down the hall in excitement with the rest of the boys lagging behind him.

“Did you smoke without me this morning, Lou?” Zayn joked from farther back in the hall where he had an arm around a giggling Liam’s shoulder.

“No, I’m genuinely happy!” Louis said, putting his arms up for exaggeration, “The world is our oyster!”

“It’s the play,” Liam explained with a fond shake of his head like he was all too used to it.

“What about it?” Niall asked from where he was walking just in front of Zayn and Liam with a hand in Harry’s.

“Yeah, I mean I love Romeo and Juliet too but I’m not literally _jumping_ for joy like your brother,” Harry said with a small smile as he watched Louis in front of them.

“Theatre. He loves Romeo and Juliet and acting. He was the lead in every school play back at home along with being footy captain,” Liam told them with a small eye roll.

“Makes for an interesting combination,” Niall commented offhandedly.

“Yeah,” Liam shrugged, “But he made it work.”

“You bet your arse I made it work!” Louis yelled proudly as he turned around with his hands on his hips and waited for the boys to catch up to him. “I got all the drama blokes from acting and all the birds from football.”

“I didn’t know you were into girls,” Harry said trying and failing to sound indifferent as opposed to indignant.

“There’s a lot you don’t know about me yet, young Harold,” Louis smiled brightly at him as he wrapped one of Harry’s ringlets around his finger and Harry couldn’t help but to smile back.

“Gonna find yourself a nice bird then so you can keep your hands off ‘im?” Niall joked, wrapping a mock possessive arm around Harry’s neck. Louis let out a little half cough, half laugh in response and Harry couldn’t help but break out into a dimply smile watching the way they were over him.

“I mean even if I did find meself a bird, I doubt I’d keep my hands off him,” Louis smirked as he slipped a hand into Harry’s back pocket and Harry blushed with another smile on his face, thanking God that Liam and Zayn were blocking them.

“Look at little Hazza pulling all the boys to his yard,” Zayn joked and they all broke out laughing.

“Mr. Tomlinson, Mr. Styles,” a sharp, gruff voice called out from behind them and the boys turned to find Headmaster Grimshaw walking up to them looking very displeased and mildly disgusted.

“Yep?” Louis responded with a strong air of nonchalance and disregard and Harry couldn’t help but to feel just a bit more turned on at Louis’s defiance and as yet another man was added into the mix trying to fight for his affection.

“Didn’t think I’d have to start saying this until the girls arrived but do keep all hands above the waist,” Nick said, doing his best to sound unaggressive though the slight heat in his eyes as he looked between the two of them told Harry it was no small feat.

“Sure thing, Headmaster Grimshaw,” Louis responded with a coy smirk as he wrapped his arm around Harry’s shoulders instead and cupped his neck in his hand. Harry blushed and bit down on his lip, keeping his gaze from Nick’s.

Nick continued to look between them, his eyes growing more and more disgruntled by the second. “My office,” he said firmly, his eyes on Harry too intense and for too long to be platonic before he settled his gaze on Louis for a brief second and walked away.

“He fucking hates you, dude,” Niall laughed as soon as Nick had rounded the corner and was out of earshot.

“I know and I never even did anything!” Louis laughed. “He’s hated me since the day we got here.”

“Gotta say you’re a bit of a badass though,” Zayn complimented him and Louis smiled, “I like it.”

“He was being a total fucking homophobe,” Louis complained, “But I love the fact that he didn’t say anything to the rest of you. Niall and Harry bloody make out in front of everyone all day and you two’ve got the disgusting puppy eyes and hold hands all day but the second I do anything, I get reprimanded.”

“We do not make out _all_ day,” Harry argued.

“Oh really?” Louis raised his brows.

“Yes really,” Harry affirmed.

“Shall I show you what you two are like, then?” Louis asked with another smirk.

“Proceed,” Harry nodded.

“ ‘Oh babe I need help with this math problem , won’t you come sit on my lap and grind your arse on my dick while we get no work done and proceed to make everyone else in the room sick’,” Louis mocked as he backed Harry to stand against the wall and placed one of his hands on his hips with the back of his own hand on his forehead, playing the damsel in distress. “ ‘Of course babe, I’d take any excuse to shove my tongue down your throat even if the reason makes absolutely no sense,” he continued, pressing kisses all over Harry’s face and neck.

“We are nothing like that,” Harry said defensively, though he had a smile on his face and his hand was still on Louis’s hip. They shared a momentary smiley gaze before Niall cut in and interrupted them.

“No, Louis,” Niall shook his head and pulled Louis away from Harry by his wrist. “It’s more like this,” he said before he slotted himself between Harry’s legs and pressed their lips together, opening up Harry’s mouth with his tongue immediately and hiking Harry’s legs up around his waist as his hands made their way up into Niall’s hair. He turned them around so that he was against the wall and Harry’s back was to Louis and Niall opened his eyes for a brief moment to wink at him in triumph before he closed them again.

“Alright boys that’s enough, save it for later,” Zayn said after witnessing the look and deciding to cut in before things got too far.

“Jealous?” Niall snarked cockily as he wrapped an arm around Harry’s waist and kept him pulled close.

“Haz is already in trouble. He doesn’t need any more with your impromptu porn shows,” Zayn replied.

Niall let out a little puff through his nose and rolled his eyes at Zayn before looking at Louis. “Point is, loads more tongue and mouth action, a lot less talking. The acting was nice though. You’re a shoe-in for Romeo,” Niall winked with a patronizing pat to Louis’s hip.

“Thanks, dick,” Louis grumbled with a sarcastic tight-lipped smile. “Me and Harriet must be getting to Headmaster Grimmy’s office now though,” Louis cocked his head to the side and smiled at Harry crassly.

“Yeah yeah,” Niall waved his hand and gave Harry another kiss before Louis was dragging him away by his hand.

“Are you jealous?” Harry asked once they were alone after rounding the corner, trying his best to stifle his laugh.

“Why should I be?” Louis replied too coolly for Harry’s comfort.

“Louis,” Harry said, a bit of confusion in his voice.

“You’re not my boyfriend,” Louis shrugged, “Make out with whoever you want to. I don’t care.”

Harry retracted after that, deciding not to push the issue any further. He let Louis keep his pace a few feet in front of him and they didn’t speak for the remainder of the walk across the building towards the office.

Nick’s door was open when they finally arrived and they walked right in, the air only getting thicker as even more tension transpired.

“Close the door behind you, Mr. Styles,” Nick grumbled as they walked in and Louis sank into one of the chairs, Harry following suit after he shut the door.

“So can I ask what this is about?” Louis asked, annoyance already thick in his tone.

“I’m sure you probably already have an idea of what this is about, Mr. Tomlinson,” Nick glared at him.

“We didn’t do anything wrong,” Louis argued.

“I didn’t say you did,” Nick stated back calmly.

“Then why are we here?” Louis asked.

“Because there are some things that I feel that we should discuss before our company arrives,” Nick stated, finally glancing at Harry. “There’s a certain … higher standard that we need to hold ourselves to when they are here, seeing as how the sponsors are the ones funding the school and the girls are a part of that as well.”

“What exactly are you trying to get at?” Louis pressed.

“I’m just going to have to be frank here but your little display in the hallway simply isn’t appropriate at any time but especially when the sponsors arrive. This is a Catholic institution and as you know-“

“I’m going to burn in hell for being a queer. Yeah I already know,” Louis cut him off.

“Mr. Tomlinson, is there a problem? I mean you generally don’t have the best attitude but this is on another scale,” Nick inquired and it actually sounded like Nick was genuinely concerned.

“Nothing, Headmaster Grimshaw. Be more straight when the sponsors get here, got it. Am I good to go to class now?” Louis snapped, already rising from his seat. They held each other’s gaze for a tense minute and it felt like no one in the room breathed until Nick finally let Louis go. “Let this be the last time I see you in my office until after the sponsors leave, Mr.Tomlinson,” Nick instructed to Louis’s already retreating back.

“Snagged yourself a good one there,” Nick quipped to Harry as soon as the door was shut again behind Louis.

“I can’t believe you didn’t go off on him, to be honest,” Harry commented.

“I probably should have but I realized on my way over here that I’d gone a bit overboard summoning you all here so I decided not to,” Nick admitted.

“ ‘A _bit_ overboard’,” Harry repeated sardonically.

“Well I did mean it though,” Nick said, “You can’t be all over each other like that when the sponsors are here. If anything, it’d be nice if they saw you all fraternizing with the girls. Give them visions of future legacies.”

“Are you gonna get jealous of the girls too?” Harry mumbled.

“Ha ha,” Nick rolled his eyes. “I missed you by the way.”

“Really? After you threatened me the last time we talked?” Harry asked recounting Nick’s threat to suspend him the morning he’d skipped mass to fool around with Louis a few weeks prior.

“I’m sorry for that, Harry. I am. I’ll admit that I can be a bit … jealous at times,” Nick admitted with a small pout and Harry laughed.

“What do you want, Nick?” Harry asked.

“I missed you,” Nick repeated, his gaze dropping from Harry’s eyes to his lips to down below his desk.

“Nick, no. I have to go to class,” Harry scoffed.

“I’ll write you a pass,” Nick smirked.

“The boys are already on edge with me as is. They’ll notice if I’m late and come back with swollen lips,” Harry said.

“Goodness, you’re no fun now that you have a stupid twat boyfriend,” Nick sighed as he pulled out his passes and started to write one out for Harry.

“He’s not my boyfriend,” Harry clarified as he took the pass from Nick and rewarded him with a small peck.

“He gave you fish lips too,” Nick called as Harry started to walk away and he flipped him off as he opened the door and left.

+++

“Where’s Louis?” Harry frowned as he took his seat in Global Studies and took note of Louis’s still empty one.

“What do you mean? Wasn’t he with you?” Zayn asked, not taking his eyes off the board from where he was copying Mr. Cohen’s notes.

“He left before I did,” Harry said.

“Was he upset when he left?” Liam inquired.

“I don’t know,” Harry shrugged, “He seemed a bit anxious to leave but he didn’t seem ‘upset’ per say.”

“I’ll go try to find him when we get out,” Zayn said.

“No, I can-“ Harry started but Liam cut him off.

“No. Zayn should do it,” Liam nodded at him.

Harry frowned but once again decided not to push the issue any further. He decided to try and text Louis instead.

**_H: Came back to class and ur not here. Where are u?_ **

When Louis didn’t respond after ten minutes, Harry sent out another one.

**_H: Hello, Earth to Louis._ **

**_H: Louis._ **

The bell rang as he was getting ready to type out a fourth message but he kept his eyes glued on his phone as he, Niall, and Liam made their way to English, much to Niall’s annoyance.

“Harry. Harry! Would you get off the bloody phone and watch where you’re walking before you run into someone,” Niall complained after having to steer Harry away from walking into Alex Gaskrath head on.

Harry only responded by stretching out his hand for Niall to hold and guide him.

+++

“Louis? Louis, mate are you in there?” Zayn asked as he pounded on Louis’s door.

Louis tried to ignore Zayn for a minute but he got yet another text from Harry and Zayn could hear the buzz through the door.

“Louis, I know you’re in there. Open the bloody door,” Zayn demanded.

“I’m fine, Zayn. Just go to class,” Louis called back.

“I’m already here,” Zayn argued, “Open the door.”

It took Louis a minute to answer and Zayn could hear shuffling and rustling behind the door but when he did, Zayn was met with the slighter lad’s disheveled hair and slightly ringed eyes.

“What are you doing?” Zayn asked, trying to glance past Louis into the dark room.

“I just didn’t feel like going to class. Was tired. I’m fine,” Louis explained, still not opening the door for Zayn to come in.

“Do you not want me here or something?” Zayn asked confusedly.

“I kind of just wanted some space but since you’re here,” Louis trailed off, “Have you got any … you know? Could use some. I’ll repay you in love and cigs.”

“Harry and Liam are going to kill me,” Zayn rolled his eyes but turned to put his back against the wall so that Louis could close the door.

“Thanks mate. You’re a saint,” Louis smiled before he stepped back into the room to grab a pack of cigarettes and a lighter and then shut the door behind him.

The walk to Zayn’s room in B-Hall and the time it takes Zayn to roll a quick two blunts passed in relative silence. Zayn focused on making sure the blunts were rolled to precision, the process always meticulous but worth it, while Louis twiddled his thumbs and looked everywhere but at his phone. Zayn texted Harry that Louis was ok so Harry didn’t text Louis again after that but it didn’t stop him from blowing up Zayn’s phone instead. Zayn texted back every so often until he was finally finished pearling the blunts and then he left his phone in his room while he led Louis out to the deck to smoke.

They stayed in their comfortable silence as they each smoked their own blunts until Zayn figured Louis was probably sedated enough for him to bring the issue at hand back up.

“So you gonna tell me what’s up now, or?” Zayn asked with an exhale of smoke.

“Nothing. I told you I’m just tired,” Louis shrugged.

Zayn rolled his eyes, “Bullshit. I use the same excuse all the time.”

“It’s not an excuse. I really am fine, Zayn. I don’t know why you and H are freaking out all of a sudden,” Louis rolled his eyes back.

“What happened at Grimshaw’s office then?” Zayn inquired and Louis frowned.

“Nothing,” he said tersely.

“Nothing,” Zayn repeated.

“We didn’t get in trouble or anything like that,” Louis shrugged.

“Then what did he want?” Zayn asked.

“He basically told us to tone down the gay,” Louis shrugged and exhaled, “Nothing I haven’t heard before.”

“What do you mean?” Zayn pressed. Louis frowned again and tried to cut his eyes but he was already too stoned for it to hold much weight. “I’m just trying to be a good friend here, Louis.”

“I get that, Zayn, and I appreciate it, I do but-,” Louis cut himself off.

“It’s just not something you want to talk about,” Zayn finished for him.

“Yeah,” Louis sighed with a puff of smoke.

“Note taken,” Zayn shrugged nonchalantly, “I mean I get it. I’m the same way and if I were asking for me I wouldn’t have asked at all but as is.”

“Who are you asking for then?” Louis asked.

“I’m pretty sure you can figure out who,” Zayn shook his head as he leaned over to ash his blunt and get a cig from Louis’s pack.

“He just doesn’t take no for an answer does he,” Louis shook his head fondly as he grabbed a cig for himself.

“Not when he really wants something,” Zayn chuckled, passing him the lighter.

“Yeah,” Louis sighed as he lit his cigarette and took a drag.

“I know it’s not my business but could you please just, you know, deal with whatever happened between this morning and now? I don’t know why you’re upset because you won’t tell me and that’s fine but I hate to see Haz upset and as long as you’re being cross with him he’s going to be a dejected little puppy dog,” Zayn said.

Louis rolled his eyes and scoffed, “I’m not ‘being cross with him’ just because I didn’t respond to a few silly messages. I said I wanted some space. That’s normal.”

“Did you _tell_ him that though?” Zayn asked.

“No,” Louis shrugged again, “I didn’t think I needed to.”

“Well with Haz you do. He honestly is like a happy, yippy little puppy when he cares about someone. He gets so excited to see you and he misses you when you’re gone. Niall’s the same way. That’s why they’re perfect for each other,” Zayn said and he could see the slight contortion in Louis’s face at his last remark. “So this sudden need for space does have to do with them then? Is it about what happened in the hall this morning?”

“I’ve seen them kiss before,” Louis said blankly.

“I meant the look,” Zayn clarified.

“What look?” Louis asked.

“I saw Niall look at you when Harry kissed him,” Zayn explained and Louis winced.

 “So you saw that too, then? Glad to know I’m not going crazy,” Louis ashed his cig and leaned back into his chair.

“They’re,” Zayn paused and frowned, “Weird. I don’t know. Have you guys not talked about it?”

“What is there to talk about?” Louis puffed, “He says they’re not boyfriends and we’re not boyfriends. What does it matter?”

“You’re clearly not happy and neither is he,” Zayn said and Louis shrugged again.

“He seemed pretty content this morning to me,” Louis snarked.

“Well now he’s not because he can tell that you’re upset with him,” Zayn retorted.

“For the billionth fucking time, I’m not bloody upset, Zayn! I don’t care. He’s not my fucking boyfriend,” Louis crossed his arms and grimaced.

“Well if you really don’t care, you should let him know that, Louis. I genuinely like you, I do, but I’m going to like you a lot less if you break his heart,” Zayn informed him.

“Please,” Louis scoffed, “ _I’m_ not the one who’s gonna break _his_ heart.”

“And what is that supposed to mean?” Zayn asked as he leaned forward to put out his cig.

“Nothing,” Louis murmured as he stood up and flicked away his cigarette butt, “I’m going back to my room. Tell him I’m fine, I’m not mad, I just wanted some sleep and I’ll resurface at lunch.”

“Louis,” Zayn said, cocking his head to the side as Louis started to walk away.

“I’m fine,” Louis called over his shoulder.

But Louis wasn’t fine and he bloody knew it. He was in far too deep over his head for someone who he knew he could never truly have. The same critical words that had sent him here, words he thought he’d escaped, had resurfaced from the Headmaster who hated him for no reason. Everywhere he turned, there was a threat trying to chip away at the armor of steel that he’d built for himself and he wasn’t so sure he could handle things on his own anymore but he didn’t know who to ask for help. Every person he could possibly turn to had a fault that made it impractical.

There was Liam who already knew a lot of what was really wrong with him deep down but he knew what Liam was like when he got mad and how he’d throw those things right back in Louis’s face. Zayn had offered his shoulder to cry on but he was already tied to Harry and Louis knew Zayn would choose Harry’s feelings over Louis’s without a doubt. And then there was Harry.

He wanted to trust Harry, more than anyone. Harry made him want a lot of things actually. Things he’d told himself a long time ago that he couldn’t afford to have anymore because the risk and the pain of the aftermath far outweighed the benefits. He’d thought he could just hook up with Harry and keep on trucking but he couldn’t. It wasn’t enough and it never would have been.

Harry was his problem. Harry was his solution. He wanted Harry. He _needed_ Harry. He needed Harry to know what was going on with him, why he was the way he was, why he felt the way he felt about things. He could imagine himself telling Harry these things, having those conversations while they laid wrapped around each other in Louis’s bed and that scared him. It scared him because it was so close, so tangible. The guard he’d worked for so long to build up was being torn down within an instant by this beautiful, stupid, mesmerizing, absolutely wonderful boy and he probably didn’t even know it. Harry was absolutely ruining Louis, destroying him from the inside out and he didn’t even realize it.

So Louis decided it was better to have his space, even if it meant that Harry would be upset. Fuck, it just evened the playing field, didn’t it? Harry was making Louis feel things that he didn’t want to so Louis would do the same in return. When he composed himself, his armor was rebuilt, and he could face Harry without the threat of crumpling and putting every bit of himself out on the table at any given moment, they could be friendly again. But for now, Louis decided that it was better if they kept their interactions as minimal and removed as possible.

 

Louis resurfaced at lunch as promised but he sat on Zayn and Liam’s side as opposed to what had become his usual seat on the other side of Harry opposite Niall. He was sure that the boys noticed but no one called him on it and he did his best to keep his eyes on his plate and not on Harry though he could feel the younger lad’s eyes burning holes in him through his fringe.

+++

“Skip with me,” Harry whined with a tug on Zayn’s hand as he was about to walk into Art after they’d all finally split up for their elective classes. Even though Art had always been a center of peace at the end of the day, he wanted to be in bed more. He’d managed to get through Math and Biology despite Louis obviously trying to ignore him at all costs but it was exhausting.

“I can’t. You know I already skipped English for you today,” Zayn told him.

“Please,” Harry pouted.

“Haz, come on,” Zayn tugged on Harry’s hand, “Why don’t you ask Niall?”

Harry let out a breath through his nose and crossed his arms, “Because I need to talk to _you_.”

“And we can’t talk in class?” Zayn asked.

“Well I wanted to do more than talk too,” Harry drew out, looking away from Zayn as he bit down on his lip.

“Haz, please. I’m trying  to be good here,” Zayn groaned as Harry tightened his grip on Zayn’s hand and used the other to take hold of his waist.

“Please, Zayn,” Harry murmured, his breath ghosting over the skin of Zayn’s neck. “I need you,” he whispered with a soft kiss to Zayn’s collar. “I need you to make me feel better,” he closed with a kiss to his jaw.

“Fuck, Liam is going to kill me and Niall and Louis are going to murder you if they don’t kill each other first,” Zayn surrendered as he let Harry lead him in the direction of his room.

 

As soon as the door was shut behind them, Harry was on Zayn again, his lips on Zayn’s lips and then his neck and his collar.

“We shouldn’t,” Zayn tried to protest between Harry’s kisses to his lips.

“Why?” Harry mumbled into his skin as he unzipped Zayn’s jeans and snaked a hand into his boxers.

“You know why,” Zayn groaned with a slight shudder as Harry tightened his grip.

“You saying you don’t want to?” Harry asked with a small bite to Zayn’s shoulder.

“Haz,” Zayn moaned.

“I’ll stop if you want me to,” Harry whispered, his lips ghosting beside Zayn’s. Zayn turned his face away, his eyes screwed tightly shut and his lip pulled between his teeth as Harry continued with his slow strokes on Zayn’s cock. “Is that what you want, Zayn? Answer me,” Harry bit down on the hinge of Zayn’s jaw below his ear.

“No,” Zayn whimpered, melting into Harry’s touch. “But no marks.”

Harry smirked and kissed Zayn’s cheek with a ‘good’ before he sank down to his knees and pulled Zayn’s boxers and jeans down with him.

Harry could see Zayn struggling with the conscience he was never sure Zayn had and pleasure as Harry sucked him off but it didn’t’ take long before Zayn had a hand in his hair and was fucking up into his mouth the way he knew Harry wanted him to.

It wasn’t his best blowjob, he was distracted and he knew Zayn was going to feel guilty afterwards no matter what, but he did better than just phoning it in and Zayn still came after not too long so he got the job done at least.

When the blush started to fade from Zayn’s cheeks and he finally opened his eyes, he glanced down at Harry and let out a little sigh at the sadness he could see in his eyes even though he wasn’t looking back up at Zayn.

“What do you want me to do?” Zayn asked softly as he stretched out his hand to help Harry up and led him to his bed.

Harry shrugged and Zayn looked at him momentarily before he eased him into lying on his back and snaked a hand into his boxers with lips pressed to Harry’s neck.

It was slow and gentle. No dirty talk or gimmicks. Just Zayn pressing kisses all over Harry’s skin as he stroked him off slowly. This was different in the sense that sex between them had always been just about getting each other off and fucking. The only other time that he could remember Zayn being this cautious and kind was freshman year when his parents had gotten divorced. He’d pressured Zayn into fucking him as opposed to talking about it but he’d gotten overwhelmed and started crying when he thought Zayn wasn’t looking. Zayn was watching him carefully though and he immediately stopped himself, taking Harry into his arms instead and took care of him with gentle kisses and strokes until he finished. Then they just lied together cuddling which was a rarity when it was just the two of them without Niall.

Harry didn’t cry this time even after he came and Zayn took him into his arms for a cuddle just like he had before. He just buried his face into Zayn’s chest as Zayn traced his thumb over Harry’s hip and pressed little kisses to his hair.

“What’s wrong, Haz?” Zayn asked him softly.

“Why is Louis mad at me?” Harry mewled.

“He’s not mad,” Zayn said, “Or at least he says he’s not.”

“Then why is he being so mean?” Harry whined and Zayn’s heart fractured just a bit.

“I think maybe he’s just, I don’t know, scared?” Zayn tried.

“Scared?” Harry furrowed his brows, “Of what?”

“Of you,” Zayn replied.

“Why?” Harry asked.

Zayn sighed, “He likes you. A lot. Probably a lot more than he thought he would and that can be scary. Especially when you don’t know if the person likes you back.”

“He knows I like him back, though,” Harry argued.

“I mean yeah but then you go and sleep with Niall every night and hold his hand and kiss him in front of Louis and then he’s not sure,” Zayn said and Harry swallowed.

“But what I do with Niall doesn’t make me want Louis any less,” Harry argued.

“But does Louis know that?” Zayn asked. “Have you guys ever actually talked about all of that?”

“No but,” Harry muttered, “I didn’t think we needed to.” Zayn couldn’t help but let out a little laugh because he’d thought that Harry and Niall had been perfect for each other but Louis and Harry had only known each other for a little over a month and they already sounded exactly like each other, the same breed of uncommunicative and emotionally stunted.

“Well I think it’s pretty clear now that you should. You’re both right miserable and I’m pretty sure if you actually talked to each other about it instead of avoiding it, you’d feel better,” Zayn told him and Harry rolled his eyes even though he knew Zayn was probably right.

“I wasn’t avoiding it,” Harry said defensively. “I’ve been trying to talk to him but he just keeps shutting me out. Like what the hell am I supposed to do with that?”

“Well maybe try again tonight,” Zayn suggested, “Go to his room or something or take him outside on the deck. Just try again.”

“Did he tell you this?” Harry inquired.

“No,” Zayn answered, “But he didn’t have to.”

It went quite between them for a moment but it was a comfortable silence until Harry spoke again, “Are you going to tell Liam?”

“Yeah,” Zayn sighed.

“I hope he doesn’t get too mad,” Harry said.

“Same. I don’t think he will. He’ll probably be more hurt than anything which sucks but,” Zayn shrugged and looked away.

“I’m sorry,” Harry said quietly.

“Not your fault,” Zayn responded even though they both knew it was a lie.

“I’m proud of you, you know,” Harry told him.

“For what?” Zayn asked.

“For the guy you’re turning out to be. You were always good deep down but it’s nice to see it out in the open more now,” Harry told him and Zayn smiled.

“Haz,” Zayn said as Harry turned more to give him a hug.

“I love you, Zayn,” Harry said quietly with a small smile.

“I love you too, Harry,” Zayn replied, rubbing his hand up and down Harry’s back.

Zayn left to go back to his own room when the final bell sounded to end class and Niall came in a short time later. He gave Harry a peck and a ruffle to his curls but nothing more happened after that; they just sat around working on their homework and Harry couldn’t have been anymore thankful for Algebra and reading assignments.

 

Dinner passed by the same as lunch. Louis sat beside Liam and Liam and Zayn looked between the two of them and at each other cautiously while Niall couldn’t have cared less and ate his and everyone else’s food. The tension at the table was palpable and no one really spoke much other than Niall. Louis and Harry caught each other’s glances on more than one occasion and Zayn told Liam that they needed to talk later that night so everyone (with the exception of Niall) was on edge by the time they were lining up their plates.

Harry and Niall went with the group going out for mini-golf and Zayn went out to the back for a cigarette while Liam followed Louis to his room.

“What, Liam?” Louis sighed as Liam came in, shutting the door behind him and taking a seat at Louis’s desk.

“What’s going on, Louis?” Liam asked, concern written all over his face.

“God, why do you all keep bloody asking me that? I’m fine for fuck’s sake,” Louis snapped.

“Louis,” Liam tsked, far too motherly for Liam’s comfort.

“I am!” Louis shouted.

“No you’re not. Something happened between this morning and now. You were happy this morning, elated even. And now you’re – like this,” Liam motioned at Louis’s hostile state.

Louis rolled his eyes and let out a hard breath, “It’s nothing, Liam.”

“Louis, please. I’m just trying to help,” Liam told him.

“I don’t need your help,” Louis shook his head.

“Why are you doing this?” Liam asked.

“Doing what?” Louis huffed exasperatedly.

“Shutting everyone out. I mean I understand Niall but the rest of us are just trying to help you. If you think no one noticed you ignoring Harry all day, we did. And it’s odd. What’s wrong?” Liam asked again.

“You wanna know what’s wrong Liam?” Louis responded finally sitting up in his bed to look at him as he wrapped his arms around his knees. “Everyone here fucking sucks. That piece of shit Grimshaw basically told me I was too gay this morning and Harry’s a piece of shit too.”

“What did Harry do?” Liam asked, his eyebrows already furrowing.

“Nothing,” Louis frowned, “He just is.”

“Oh Louis,” Liam cooed as he reached out to give him a hug.

“I hate it here,” Louis sighed into Liam’s shoulder.

“I’m sorry you had a bad day,” Liam said as he pulled back and patted Louis’s head which made them both smile just a little.

“I just wish we could go back home,” Louis laid back down. Liam shrugged and took too long to respond and Louis rolled his eyes, “I know you don’t wish the same.”

“No,” Liam couldn’t help but to smile.

“Go on. I know you want to talk about it,” Louis rolled his eyes though he still had a smile on his lips.

“I didn’t think I’d like it here but I do, I really do. The teachers, the people, everything is great. Not to toot my own horn or anything but I’m getting really good in Music and my marks are going up. And then Zayn. God. I really like him Louis, like _really_ like him. So much that I’m not even scared of the fact that he’s a boy, you know. It’s just him,” Liam gushed and Louis tried his best not to gag.

“Yeah, Zayn is pretty cool, I guess,” Louis conceded.

“I know! I don’t know what he sees in me, but everything about him is perfect. Well almost everything,” Liam frowned just a bit.

“What do you mean?” Louis turned and propped his head in his hand to look at Liam.

“Well you know. That whole thing he has with Harry and Niall and that girl from the school down the street,” Liam’s smile dropped.

“It sucks,” Louis agreed.

“Yeah. I mean, I know he cares about me and he likes me, he tells me all the time, but it doesn’t change the fact that he’s probably saying it to them too. I just wish that it could just be me and him, you know?” Liam said.

“Yeah,” Louis nodded because of course he knew. He was going through the same thing with Harry except Harry had never made any kind of steps to break things off with the other two and show his devotion to Louis like Zayn had done for Liam.

“Well anyways, I just came to make sure that you were ok. I’m sorry about what Grimshaw said to you. That’s totally messed up. Is there anyone you can tell?” Liam asked and Louis let out an annoyed huff at his naivety.

“Of course not. He’s right. He’ll always be right because it’s basically his school,” Louis rolled his eyes and laid back down again.

“He is not right, Louis,” Liam told him.

“Yeah he is,” Louis sighed, “I’m a fag. You’ve said it yourself too.”

“Louis,” Liam said in a small voice.

“It’s fine, Liam. It’s nothing I haven’t heard before. And bloody hell, looks like you’re one too now innit?”

“Louis don’t say that,” Liam frowned.

“What, that you’re gay?” Louis asked.

“No, the other thing,” Liam said.

“What that I’m a faggot? A queer?” Louis pushed.

“Stop it, Louis,” Liam frowned.

“Well I am,” Louis shrugged, “I’m a dick and theatre loving fag and my life sucks because of it.”

“Louis, stop.”

“Stop _what_ , Liam?” Louis snapped. “Saying the truth? It was never a fucking secret.”

“You’re life doesn’t suck, Louis. You had one bad day. Go to sleep and try again tomorrow but you can’t say things like that. You’re gay but you’re not a ‘faggot’ or a ‘queer’. You’ve always been proud of who you are and how strong are you are and so have I. I look up to you, Louis. Even when I said those awful things to you. I was jealous because even though you were gay, I knew you were more incredible and a better guy than I’d ever be. You’re amazing, Louis, and being gay doesn’t inhibit that. It just makes you that much stronger. And you need to be because you’ve got three little sisters and a little brother looking up to you,” Liam said and Louis had to fight to hold back his tears. “I love you, Louis Tomlinson. And I’ll always be here for you.”

“What did I do to deserve getting a little brother like you?” Louis shook his head.

“I don’t know,” Liam laughed and gave him another hug.

 

Zayn was back in his bed, glasses on, with a book on his knees by the time Liam got back to the room and Liam couldn’t help but smile in the doorway at how lucky he was to have such a hot and smart boy to call partially his.

“I take it things with Lou went ok then?” Zayn asked as he put down his book and opened his arms for Liam to crawl in for a cuddle.

“I think he’s more upset about some things than he’d like to let on but he was smiling again by the time that I left so I think he’s going to be ok,” Liam said and Zayn nodded. “So what did we need to talk about?” Liam asked cautiously and Zayn froze for a moment.

He took a deep breath and looked at Liam for a moment before he looked away again. “I have to tell you something that you’re probably not gonna want to hear.”

“Oh God,” Liam said under his breath.

“Harry and I hooked up today. He was sad and I just wanted to help him,” Zayn told him and Liam frowned.

“There are ways to make people feel better without fucking them, you know,” Liam sighed.

“Liam,” Zayn tried but Liam was already moving away. “Please don’t be mad.”

“I’m not mad,” Liam huffed even though he was putting more space between them, “I’m just- aggravated.”

“I’m sorry,” Zayn tried and Liam rolled his eyes.

“No you’re not. You’re always doing it.”

“You don’t understand,” Zayn shook his head.

“What is there to understand?” Liam asked.

“You guys came at a really-“ Zayn sighed, “We were already having problems before and you and Louis only made things more difficult. But it’s always just been the three of us, even if we hooked up with someone else. We weren’t boyfriends but- God, I don’t know it’s complicated.  But we’re there for each other and I can’t just stop being there for them. Harry needed me today and he needed to feel better. He didn’t want to talk. I would’ve if he wanted to and we did after, but that’s not what he wanted at first. I hate that the things that I do bother you, Liam, I do but I can’t just- abandon them.”

Liam turned away and crossed his arms and Zayn tried to get him to lay back down but Liam shrugged him away. “I really am sorry, Liam,” Zayn tried again.

“I know,” Liam murmured and let out a breath as he turned over again, “And I know it’s probably going to happen again. Probably a lot more times. I’m just not used to it.”

“Used to what?” Zayn asked gently.

“Having to share someone I like,” Liam pouted. Zayn couldn’t help but to smile fondly and lean in to give him a kiss.

“I know it doesn’t seem like it, but I promise one day it really is just gonna be you and me,” Zayn told him as he ran a hand through Liam’s hair and Liam smiled up at him before he furrowed his brows again.

 “What?” Zayn asked.

“Just- sometimes I wonder if you still see them because I’m, you know-“ Liam muttered, his gaze still averted from Zayn’s. Zayn shook his head, not understanding. “A virgin.”

“What?” Zayn gaped, “No. No, of course not, Liam. That doesn’t matter to me. I’m not using them for sex or not being with you because of that.”

“I want to,” Liam assured him. “I just- I want to do it right, you know? I want to know that you’re gonna be here the next morning and the next night and that I don’t have to worry about who you kissed an hour before that or if you’re gonna have sex with someone else right after. I want it to mean as much to you as it will to me. And I know it probably sounds dumb to you because you’ve done it loads of times with loads of people so it’s probably not special to you anymore but it’s gonna mean everything to me, Zayn.”

“Liam,” Zayn smiled at him fondly again, “I’m gonna ignore the fact that you basically just called me a slag, but I get it and there’s no pressure. I don’t want you to do anything that you’re not comfortable with. And it is going to mean something to me because you mean something to me and I know how big of a deal it is to you. I’m willing to wait because I know how important it is to you and I respect that. You being a virgin doesn’t make me want to be with you any less. The other – things that I have to do are because they were set in stone long before I even met you,” Zayn told him.

“Well that’s good to hear,” Liam smiled and Zayn kissed him again.

“I’m glad you feel like you can talk to me about things, though,” Zayn said and Liam let out a little laugh.

“It’s not pulling teeth like with Louis.”

“Not at all,” Zayn laughed and shook his head. “Harry’s gonna be in for it isn’t he?”

“Judging by the way he was all day and how he acted when I first got to his room tonight, Harry’s not getting anything out of him. At least not tonight,” Liam shook his head.

 

And Liam was right. Harry went straight to Louis’s room that night when he’d gotten back from mini golf but Louis refused to open the door.

“I know you’re in there, Louis,” Harry said as he knocked a third time, “Open the door.”

“Go away,” Louis finally responded and Harry’s heart sank.

“Louis,” Harry said and the hurt was evident in his voice.

“Piss off, Harry,” Louis said and his voice shook too but he was going to pin it on rage instead of sadness if anyone tried to call him on it.

“Please,” Harry tried again, “What did I do?”

“Nothing,” Louis’s voice wavered again, “I’m tired. It’s been a long day. Please just go.”

“Okay,” Harry sniffed. He turned to leave but he couldn’t, not immediately. He was paused at the door for a minute and when he finally decided it was time to walk away he just caught the tail end of a choked sob coming from behind the door and his heart fractured even more. He rested his forehead on the door and reached a hand to trail his fingers on the wood as he listened to Louis cry behind the door and he couldn’t help but to tear up himself. Little did he know Louis was closer than he thought, his back rested against the door with his head hung on his knees.

Niall was already asleep by the time Harry finally left from Louis’s and he was thankful that he didn’t have to explain why he was crying. There was no way he would have been able to explain that he was crying because he was in love with Louis but Louis wanted nothing to do with him anymore and he had no idea what he’d done to fuck things up before they’d ever had a real chance of getting started.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys so much for your messages on Tumblr and your comments on here! I promise I don't purposefully draw out the updates, I just always get busy but when I get a comment I force myself to write and then you guys get a 10k update to make up for the wait! But I'm thinking the girls are going to come during the next chapter or definitely in the one after that so things are going to heat up and there will be more back stories to come!


	7. Chapter 7

Louis’s avoidance game continued on through the rest of the week and into the next. He didn’t speak to the boys much during class and any free time he had, he spent alone in his room or with Liam if he was assured that it would only be the two of them. It didn’t help his case when Harry got paired as his Juliet in English during one of their class reads. It was awkward and Louis was sure the tension was palpable.

By the time Friday rolled around and it was time for auditions, Louis’s will had finally waned down enough that he couldn’t help but to break and talk to Harry again because he was so bloody nervous and as supportive as Liam was, it wasn’t the same as Harry’s comforting hands on his forearms as he looked at Louis with his adoring eyes and fond smile and assured him of how incredible he was.

He called Harry to sit beside him in Bio in what had become Liam’s seat and Harry looked confused at first but he obliged and took the seat beside him.

“Hi,” he tried with a small smile.

Harry furrowed his brows and bit down on his lip. “Hi.”

“Are you auditioning for anything?” Louis asked.

Harry shook his head, “Nope. I’m doing set design with Zayn. Wouldn’t want to anyways.”

“Why?”

“Cause it’s yours,” Harry said simply. Louis smiled and Harry finally smiled back at him; big teeth, dimples, and all.

“You think so?” Louis asked and Harry nodded.

“Course. I’ve never seen someone so good at turning themselves on and off as you,” Harry’s smile dissipated and Louis’s followed suit.

“I deserve that, I guess,” Louis conceded. “I’m sorry.”

Harry kept his frown for a moment longer before he finally took a breath and let it go, turning his attention to Mrs. Heathrow’s notes on the board. “I missed you,” he said quietly.

“I missed you too,” Louis reached out his hand. Harry glanced at it before he looked up into Louis’s eyes. Louis nodded for him to take it and he did, brushing his thumb over Louis’s knuckles as he copied down the notes and Louis finally started to feel relaxed again.

“Where’d you go?” Harry asked, his eyes still on the board. Louis frowned and bit down on his lip.

“It doesn’t matter anymore, Haz. I’m here again,” Louis told him, cocking his head under Harry’s to get him to look at him as he brushed his thumb over Harry’s knuckles and then kissed his hand. “I’ve got auditions at 4:30 but you should come ‘round to mine after Math. Help me run my lines,” Louis suggested with a smirk and Harry gave him another bright smile.

“Sure,” Harry nodded, his gaze going from Louis’s eyes to his lips and back. “Sounds great.”

 

They didn’t get much rehearsing done but their fooling around did calm Louis’s nerves enough to make him more relaxed for his audition. Until he got to the gym.

He should have expected that the girls would be doing their auditions as well but it still caught him off guard, nonetheless. And to make matters worse, Headmaster Grimshaw was on the review panel.

“And next up we’ll have Louis Tomlinson and,” Headmaster Grimshaw paused to scan the crowd for a viable girl, “Perrie Edwards to the stage. Lovely. Now for your scene you two’ll be doing a read through of the lovers’ double suicide. It’s arguably one of the most passionate love scenes in play history so it calls for a lot of chemistry. Don’t muck it up.”

“Bit advanced scene for the auditions don’t you think, Grims?” Greg James, the actual director of the play said but Headmaster Grimshaw shrugged, his gaze trained on Louis intimidatingly.

“If they get it, they’ll have to preform it.”

“We can do it,” Louis said, sticking his chin out and crossing his arms before he took Perrie’s hand to lie her down on the floor and subtly snatched the script that Grimshaw was holding out to him.

“O my love, my wife! Death, that hath sucked the honey of thy breath, hath had no power yet upon thy beauty. Thou art not conquered. Beauty’s ensign yet is crimson in thy lips and in thy cheeks, and death’s pale flag is not advanced there.—Tybalt, liest thou there in thy bloody sheet? O, what more favor can I do to thee, than with that hand that cut thy youth in twain to sunder his that was thine enemy? Forgive me, cousin.—Ah, dear Juliet, why art thou yet so fair?

Shall I believe that unsubstantial death is amorous, and that the lean abhorred monster keeps thee here in dark to be his paramour? For fear of that, I still will stay with thee, and never from this palace of dim night depart again. Here, here will I remain with worms that are thy chamber maids. Oh, here will I set up my everlasting rest, and shake the yoke of inauspicious stars from this world-wearied flesh.

 Eyes, look your last. Arms, take your last embrace. And, lips, O you the doors of breath, seal with a righteous kiss a dateless bargain to engrossing death.”

Louis paused and bit down on his lip, unsure of what to do next. The line called for him to kiss Juliet but it didn’t feel right, not only because everyone was watching him and this was Zayn’s girl (or ex-girl?) under him, but he felt next to no attraction for Perrie. Not that she wasn’t pretty, because she was, but no girl had ever gotten him going the way Harry did. So he kissed her cheek instead, using her face to block where his lips actually went.

Everyone broke out into applause, even Grimshaw and the glimmer in Mr. James’s eyes as he looked at Louis was unmistakable.

“That was amazing, Louis. Now for Juliet.”

Louis and Perrie adjusted themselves accordingly so that Perrie was now lying on top of Louis, his eyes closed and arms crossed over his chest.

“What’s here? A cup, closed in my true love’s hand? Poison, I see, hath been his timeless end.—O churl, drunk all, and left no friendly drop to help me after? I will kiss thy lips. Haply some poison yet doth hang on them, to make me die with a restorative.” Perrie leaned down and sealed their lips in a soft, gentle kiss that opened Louis’s eyes up. “Thy lips are warm,” Perrie said, unable to hide her smirk as she ran her thumb over Louis’s lips.

“Yea, noise? Then I’ll be brief. O happy dagger, this is thy sheath. There rust and let me die,” Perrie plunged her fist into her side and then fell on top of Louis, lying her head on his chest and taking hold of his hand and everyone in the auditorium clapped once again.

“That was amazing you two,” Mr. James said as he rose from his chair, still clapping, and made his way to the stage to help the two of them up. “Your chemistry was spot on! Best pair I’ve seen all day. Now I shouldn’t be making promises I can’t keep but, between us three, you’re my number ones. Results will be posted tomorrow morning and rehearsals start up on Monday.” He clapped them both on their backs and made his way back to his seat at the judging table but shot them both a subtle thumbs up.

Perrie smirked at Louis as she gave him a onceover and he shifted nervously. “What?”

“See you at rehearsals, Monday, Romeo,” she bit down on her lip and winked, brushing her hand over his as she walked past him and through the auditorium doors. That’s when Louis spotted Harry standing in the back, his eyebrows knit together and his arms crossed.

“You came,” Louis said as he made his way over and opened his arms for a hug but Harry put his hands up.

“Looks like your audition went well,” Harry deadpanned.

“Haz, I didn’t pick the scene, Grimshaw did. And I didn’t even kiss her. She kissed me when I was playing dead. What was I supposed to do?” Louis said defensively but Harry still frowned at him anyways. “It was just acting, Harry. It doesn’t mean anything. And do you wanna know something? I couldn’t even kiss her during my monologue because I was thinking about you.”

“Is that so?” Harry tapped his foot impatiently and crossed his arms again.

“Very much so,” Louis smirked as he nodded and took Harry’s hands in his. “Come to my room with me again? Think I’ve gotta work on my kissing since it’s going to be on full display for everyone to see.”

“And what do I get out of this?” Harry pouted.

“Me,” Louis smiled and bit down on his lip.

“What a prize,” Harry smiled back.

“Best prize of all,” Louis said as he grabbed Harry’s hand and led him out of the auditorium.

***

“Did you see the girl Louis got to audition with?” Justin asked Niall, “Total babe.”

“Yeah she was pretty hot,” Niall agreed with a nod.

“Did you see that kiss though? And that was only for an audition. Imagine what she’s like in the sac.”

“I’ve heard I’m pretty good actually,” Perrie snarked as she came up to the two of them with her best friend, Leigh Anne beside her. “Don’t just take my word for it, though. Ask her.”

Justin and Niall’s mouths both dropped.

“Yeah, she’s pretty good,” Leigh Anne smirked and Perrie winked.

“And my name is Perrie by the way. Only my favorites get to call me ‘babe’. This is Leigh Anne,” Perrie introduced the both of them with a smile and Niall’s eyes instantly slit.

“Perrie as in Perrie Edwards?” He asked.

“You’ve got it,” she said coyly. “Have we met before?”

“No,” Niall shook his head, “You’re Zayn’s friend.”

“You could say that I guess,” she smirked. “How’d you know?”

Niall was more than tempted to let her know that he was one of Zayn’s special ‘friend’s too but he bit his tongue and settled on, “He’s mentioned you is all.”

“Good things, I hope,” she said with a smile that made Niall’s stomach turn. “What are you guys’ names?”

“I’m Niall,” he answered flatly.

“Justin.”

“Well it’s nice to meet you guys. Did you boys audition for the play?” Perrie inquired.

“I did,” Justin spoke up.

“What role?” Perrie inquired.

“Romeo,” Justin answered with a coy smile. Perrie smirked.

Niall kept his eyes trained on Leigh Anne while Perrie and Justin kept their eyes on each other as they spoke. She looked bored, as if she’d heard Perrie’s chat up routine too many times before to still be interested.

“Hey, Leigh Anne,” Niall said, drawing her attention, “Mind helping me run my lines before I go in for my audition?”

“You’re auditioning?” Justin asked incredulously and Niall shrugged.

“Sure, I guess,” Leigh Anne said, looking towards Perrie for a nod of approval before she went away with him.

“What part?” She asked as Niall led her in the direction of the courtyard.

“None. I just made that up to steal you away,” Niall chuckled. “You looked bored.”

Leigh Anne shrugged, “I’m used to it by now, I guess.”

“What do you mean?” Niall asked.

“I mean don’t get me wrong, I love Pez. But any opportunity she gets to be around guys, she like loses it. She’ll go after anything that’s slightly attractive and breathing.” Niall shrugged. “I don’t know, it’s just kind of annoying sometimes. She’s always doing it and guys just eat it up.”

“No wonder her and Zayn got on so well,” Niall snarked and Leigh Anne rolled her eyes. “What, not a fan?”

“Not particularly,” Leigh Anne grimaced.

“Why not? I thought all girls loved him.” Niall inquired and Leigh Anne rolled her eyes again.

“He’s pretty hot, yeah, but he’s like a male Perrie. Completely shallow. Self-obsessed. Way too flirty. Like when Perrie would sneak him into the building if he saw any girl, he’d flirt with her, right in front of Perrie too and she didn’t even care. I don’t know, the two of them together just rubbed me the wrong way. He’s stopped coming around as much, which I’m all for, but Pez is going all out with the guys here trying to make him jealous. It’s so dumb,” she shook her head and Niall shrugged again.

“Why does it bother you so much?” Niall asked.

“Because,” Leigh Anne said defensively, “She’s my best friend. She has so much more to her than her looks. Like she’s so amazing but she sells herself so short and it’s such a waste.”

“You sound like a great friend,” Niall told her honestly. Leigh Anne made a face at that but she didn’t say more and Niall didn’t press her on it.

***

“So are we ever going to talk about it or are you just going to keep pretending nothing happened?” Harry asked as he and Louis laid cuddled up in Louis’s bed after a hot and heavy make-up round.

“Jesus, Haz. What is there to talk about?” Louis groaned, taking his hand from Harry’s and rolling over onto his side.

“Why you keep pushing me away, perhaps?” Harry pressed, putting his hand on Louis’s shoulder.

“Maybe I just needed space?” Louis bit and Harry frowned, taking his hand from Louis’s shoulder and pulling the duvet up to his chin. “It’s not you, Haz. You’re great,” Louis added quickly.

“Then what is it, Louis?” Harry asked, still frowning, and Louis didn’t like it.

“It’s-,” Louis paused and looked down, “Not important. I told you that earlier. It doesn’t matter because things are good again and I’m hopefully going to get Romeo and you’re going to be my pretty little Juliet,” Louis smiled and leaned in to give Harry a kiss.

“I hope you get it,” Harry smiled back, “You did really well. I just hope Perrie’s not your Juliet.”

“She was pretty something,” Louis laughed.

“Yeah, she’s pretty something alright,” Harry rolled his eyes.

“She seemed … nice,” Louis tried.

“Yeah I’m sure she’s nice to anything breathing that has a dick attached to it,” Harry snarked.

“Oh Haz, come on. Don’t be jealous,” Louis gave his shoulder a little push and Harry pushed back.

“Please. I am not jealous. I just feel like she subconsciously tries to go after every guy I’ve been with even though we don’t even know each other,” Harry said and Louis let out a little chuckle.

“Well I can assure you that Perrie isn’t gonna get very far with me,” Louis said.

“Not your type?” Harry asked.

“Nah,” Louis shook his head, “I’m more of a brunette kind of guy.”

“What else is your type?” Harry inquired.

“Tall, lanky, slow drawn-out deep voice with curls and dimples,” Louis smirked and Harry smiled.

“Is that so?” Harry smirked and Louis crawled on top of him, giving him another kiss.

“Mhm,” Louis smiled, “With nice, soft, pink lips and sea-glass eyes.”

“Sea glass eyes, huh? I’ve never gotten that one before,” Harry said and Louis smirked.

“I’m your first something then,” Louis said proudly, biting down on his lips before he bit down on Harry’s.

“My first something,” Harry repeated with a nod.

“Your first something,” Louis smiled and gave him another kiss.

***

Everyone was in a good mood all at once for the first time in over a week by the time dinner rolled around and it felt good. Harry sat between Louis and Niall on side of the table while Zayn and Liam sat beside each other on the other. Louis kept a hand in Harry’s through the entire meal and the way his eyes crinkled when he laughed or smiled at Harry was unmistakable.

“How’d your audition go?” Liam asked with a smile at one point because he was pretty sure he already knew the answer.

“I think it went okay,” Louis said with a modest shrug.

“He did great!” Harry added with a squeeze to Louis’s hand under the table, earning him a smile.

“Who’d you audition with?” Niall asked coyly, taking a sip from his drink and Louis and Harry both cut their eyes at him. Zayn and Liam shared a questioning look before they both turned to Louis.

“Does it matter?” Louis said defensively.

“No. Just curious,” Niall shrugged nonchalantly, “Could’ve sworn it was Perrie Edwards.”

Zayn paused, looking at Niall like a deer in headlights before his face hardened as he turned his attention to Louis. Louis shrugged and took a sip from his drink.

“Well was it?” Zayn pressed.

“Yeah,” Louis shrugged, “But it doesn’t matter. It was just an audition; it didn’t mean anything.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Zayn asked.

“I didn’t know I had to,” Louis frowned, looking to Harry for support before he turned back to Zayn. “Literally nothing happened, Zayn. She kissed me when the scene called for it but that was it.”

“She’s not his type,” Harry added for him, rubbing a hand over Louis’s back. “Why are you getting so upset about this? She’s not even your girlfriend.”

Zayn glared at Harry and let out a puff through his nose in response before he turned his attention back to Louis. “I’m not mad. I just-. Whatever.”

“I’m pretty sure she’s sleeping with one of her friends from Canterbury anyways,” Niall supplied and they all turned their attention to him.

“What?” Zayn asked.

“She seemed pretty fucking straight to me,” Louis said, raising his brows incredulously.

“Well she was trying to hit on me and Justin after her audition and she told us she’s slept with one of her friends. I talked to Leigh Anne after and the way she talked about Perrie just made it seem like there’s something more than just friends there,” Niall explained.

“Why were you talking to Leigh Anne?” Zayn asked, “And where was Perrie?”

“Because I can?” Niall retorted, “She looked bored so I entertained her while Perrie was with Justin.”

Zayn groaned and let out another puff through his nose.

“Why are you getting so mad?” Harry questioned, taking a glance at how uncomfortable Liam looked.

“I’m not. I- don’t want to talk about this anymore. Let’s talk about something else,” Zayn demanded.

The boys changed topics quickly after that and soon enough, the tension had dissipated for the most part although Zayn still looked quite agitated. He kept his mouth in a tight line with his fingertips pressed together before Liam eventually snaked his hand between them for Zayn to hold. Liam didn’t speak much either and looked like every minute the boys spent at the table was slowly killing him.

Once they’d all finished, they parted; Zayn went with Liam, and Harry was hot behind Niall, promising Louis he’d come by either later that night or in the morning.

“Not going to your boyfriend’s tonight?” Niall snarked as Harry trailed behind him on their way to the room.

“Don’t,” Harry hissed.

Niall shrugged and they made the rest of the walk in silence.

When they reached the room, Harry tapped his foot as he waited for Niall to unlock the door and shut it promptly behind him as Niall laid down on his bed and started to undress.

“No,” Harry shook his head.

“What?” Niall asked.

“I’m not touching you. I am so- what the hell is wrong with you?” Harry scrubbed his hands down his face before he rested them on his hips.

“What are you on about, Haz?” Niall groaned and rolled onto his side, pulling his phone from his pocket.

“You know what I’m talking about, Niall,” Harry snapped, snatching Niall’s phone which earned a protest and scowl in the process.

“I didn’t do anything” Niall cut his eyes.

“Yes, you did!” Harry argued.

“No, I didn’t!” Niall protested.

“You started another fight, Niall. You know what you did,” Harry said accusingly.

“I’m not the one that kissed Perrie,” Niall grumbled.

“Did you kiss Leigh Anne?” Harry inquired.

“What?” Niall retorted.

“Did you kiss Perrie’s friend, Leigh Anne?” Harry repeated.

“I know who Leigh Anne is, Harry.”

“Then answer the question,” Harry deadpanned.

“Would you even care if I did?” Niall breathed.

“What?” Harry asked.

“I said ‘would you even care?’” Niall repeated himself. “I mean because your head’s been so far up Louis’s ass lately that I’m not really sure.”

“Oh Niall don’t-,” Harry scowled and turned away before he looked at Niall again. “Is that what this is about?”

“About what?” Niall asked.

“Are you trying to get back at all of us for-” Harry shook his head and cut himself off.

“Oh get over yourself,” Niall grimaced and turned away.

“I’m just trying to figure out what’s going on with you,” Harry said softly. “I thought things were getting better but it seems like everything’s just falling apart again.”

“Save it,” Niall whispered under his breath. He let out a sigh and pulled his duvet up to his chin without another word.

“I take it you’re done?” Harry asked, rolling his eyes.

“Goodnight, Haz. Give Louis a kiss for me,” Niall snarked and Harry let out a puff through his nose before he turned around and left.

***

“Have a nice smoke?” Liam asked as Zayn trailed back into their room, shutting the door behind him before he crawled into Liam’s bed and wrapped his arms around him.

“Wish you would’ve come out to join me,” Zayn nuzzled his forehead into the skin on the back of Liam’s neck and gave his ear a small kiss.

Liam furrowed his brows and let out a small ‘hmpf’ to which Zayn backed away and looked at him quizzically, “Is everything ok?”

“I don’t know. You tell me,” Liam responded as he turned around and Zayn separated himself.

“What did I do?” Zayn asked.

“Why did you get so mad at dinner?” Liam questioned.

Zayn quirked his brows and licked his lips frustratedly as he crossed his arms. “I don’t know,” he said flatly.

“Is it because you still have feelings for Perrie?” Liam asked.

“I don’t know,” Zayn repeated.

“Would you please just talk to me?” Liam pled and Zayn let out another puff through his nose.

“There’s nothing to talk about, Liam. I don’t know why I got upset and I don’t know how I feel about Perrie. I don’t see why you care either. It’s not important,” Zayn said.

“Fine. You can sleep in your own bed tonight then,” Liam grumbled as he turned over again and waited for Zayn to move.

“Liam, don’t be like this,” Zayn said softly, rubbing a hand on his shoulder.

“I just want to know why, Zayn. Do you know what that felt like for me? Watching you get so riled up over your ex with me sitting there like chopped liver? What happened between them wasn’t even real; it was acting,” Liam said.

“And I told you that I don’t know, Liam,” Zayn repeated. He took a deep breath and then he went on, “Sometimes I don’t feel enough and sometimes I feel too much. Perrie and I weren’t together but that doesn’t mean that I didn’t care about her.” Liam let out an annoyed huff.

“I care about you more, though, so I’m sorry if I hurt you or embarrassed you. I really didn’t mean to,” Zayn assured him with a kiss to his cheek. “I can’t really blame you since I don’t have the best track record when it comes to commitment and relationships but at least you know when I really do care, it doesn’t just stop. And I really do care about you, Liam. You might not see it now, but the last thing I ever want to do is hurt you. I just want you to be happy.”

Liam smiled and turned over in Zayn’s arms. “I care about you too, Zayn.”

“That’s good to hear,” Zayn smiled and kissed him again, “Can I stay in your bed?”

“Course,” Liam kissed his shoulder blade, “I probably couldn’t go to sleep without your cuddles and kisses anyways.”

“God, when did I turn into such a sap?” Zayn laughed, shaking his head as he turned off the lamp.

“ ‘s not a bad thing. I like it,” Liam mumbled sleepily.

***

“Any luck getting your boyfriend under control?” Louis asked as Harry made his way into Louis’s room and shut the door before he started stripping.

“Don’t start, Tomlinson,” Harry growled as he tugged off his jeans.

“Ooo say my name like that again,” Louis smirked and spread his legs for Harry to crawl between. “Reminds me of my footie days.”

“You’re a filthy narcissist,” Harry said, licking his lips before he latched them onto Louis’s neck.

“I missed this,” Louis moaned as he arched his back underneath Harry’s weight on top of him.

“That why you’re so eager?” Harry licked a stipe up Louis’s neck and rubbed his knee against the tenting crotch of Louis’s joggers.

“Don’t tease. ‘S cruel,” Louis groaned as Harry sank his teeth back into his neck.

“So sorry,” Harry giggled and gave him another lick and kiss to his neck.

“Haven’t had my cock in you in almost 2 weeks. I don’t how much longer I can hold out,” Louis groaned as he rutted underneath Harry again.

“And whose fault was that?” Harry teased as he caught a fistful of Louis’s shirt.

“Mine, mine. I know. I’m shit. Let’s just skip to the good part, yeah?” Louis smirked as he pulled Harry in for a kiss and Harry started to pull off his shirt from the back.

“And what exactly does that entail this time?” Harry asked, waggling his eyebrows.

“What do you want it to entail?” Louis asked as seductively as he could before they both fell into a fit of laughter.

When their breaths started to slow, they locked eyes and they both swallowed. Louis licked his lips and Harry lifted his arms from where he’d had them resting on his knees to drape them over Louis's shoulders and leaned in to seal their lips in their first real kiss of the night. Harry had a hand on Louis’s cheek and the other caressing the side of his hip right above his joggers while Louis’s hands had drifted up into the bundles of Harry’s curls.

 “This is nice,” Harry smiled and rested his head on Louis’s shoulder, wrapping his arms around his slight waist as he sat in Louis’s lap.

“It is nice,” Louis agreed, kissing Harry’s cheek.

“Can I stay over?” Harry asked, looking at him through his curls that had drooped over his forehead.

“Course,” Louis breathed, “I’d love for you to.”

“Good because I really want to,” Harry smiled and leaned in to give him another kiss.

“Well what are we gonna do then?” Louis asked with a smirk.

“Sleep, obviously,” Harry scoffed and they both laughed. “I actually am a bit tired though. It’s been a long day. I could go for a nice kiss and cuddle session.”

Louis laughed and pulled him in closer before laying them down, “I suppose I can manage that.”

***

“Hazza. Haz. Harriet. Harry!” Louis shouted, shaking Harry’s shoulders as he straddled his hips in an attempt to wake him.

“Yes, yes. I’m up,” Harry rubbed at his eyes.

“It’s morning,” Louis smiled down at him, adding in a good morning kiss.

“It is morning,” Harry conceded.

“Which means the cast list is posted on the auditorium doors,” Louis beamed and stood up.

“Yes,” Harry nodded.

“So let’s go!” Louis said and Harry let out a little laugh as he shook his head and got out of bed.

“Just throw something on. We have to go,” Louis said, tossing Harry some clothes off the ground.

“I don’t know why you’re so antsy,” Harry said as he pulled Louis’s t-shirt over his head. “You already know that you got it.”

 “I don’t _know_ that,” Louis argued.

“You know,” Harry repeated and leaned in to give him a kiss.

“Ok, let’s go,” Louis demanded although he couldn’t help the grin that split onto his face. He slipped a hand into Harry’s and led him out of his room.

Louis was sprinting by the time the auditorium doors were in sight and he dragged Harry along behind him like his personal doll.

Sure enough, Louis’s name was at the top of the list across from _Romeo_ and he immediately jumped into Harry’s arms in excitement.

“I knew you’d get it,” Harry smiled as he ran his hands into Louis’s hair and gave him a kiss before setting him back down.

“This is so great,” Louis smiled as he leaned his head back against Harry’s shoulder and read through the rest of the list.

His smile remained until he got to the list of girls’ roles at the bottom of the page and found Perrie’s name across from _Juliet._ “So great,” Louis repeated, this time in a much less enthusiastic tone.

“Hey, you still got Romeo,” Harry told him and bumped his hip.

“Yeah but having her as Juliet is gonna be so weird,” Louis grimaced and stuck out his tongue.

“Just pretend she’s me,” Harry smirked and it made Louis smile before he leaned in to kiss him. “How about a celebratory breakfast?”

“Should we get the others?” Louis asked.

Harry smiled and shook his head, “Not just yet. We never got to the good part last night.”

Louis’s eyes flickered up as he grinned and gave Harry another kiss as he squeezed his hand. “Can’t wait.”

Harry smirked and bit his lip at Louis’s renewed zeal. “Wish I could carry you back.”

“I wish you could too,” Louis said quietly, squeezing Harry’s hand as they walked back in the direction of Louis’s room.

Harry had Louis pressed to the door as soon as it was shut behind them and wasted no time getting their mouths reconnected. He slipped a thumb under the waistband of Louis’s boxers to stroke at his skin lightly as he licked into his mouth and Louis got a fistful of Harry’s shirt in one hand and a palmful of Harry’s bum in the other.

 Harry moved to bite at Louis’s neck and Louis bit down on his lip. He wanted to push Harry off, tell him he couldn’t leave marks because of rehearsals, but he couldn’t bring himself to because it just felt so good to have Harry on him again. So instead, Louis settled on rutting underneath him while he bit down on his lips and tugged at Harry’s curls.

Harry gave Louis another soft peck on his lips before he moved down, leaving a trail of soft kisses from Louis’s neck to the skin above the waistband of his joggers. Harry got a hand underneath to start slowly stroking Louis off as he moved his mouth to suck a mark into the skin of Louis’s hip and it took everything in Louis not to come just from how much it turned him on.

Harry sucked at his skin until he’d left a satisfying deep maroon mark and dragged his tongue across Louis’s skin to his other hip. He couldn’t help but smirk as Louis curled in on himself and dug his fingers deeper into Harry’s curls.

“Don’t tease, Haz,” Louis breathed heavily.

“Sorry, Tommo,” Harry mimicked, his breath just as heavy as Louis’s before he sank his teeth back into Louis’s hip.

Once Louis had a lovebite to match on both hips, Harry finally moved his head back closer to where Louis wanted it. He licked his lips and bit down on the waistband of Louis’s joggers before he dragged them down slowly, just below his bum. Louis’s breathing got heavier once again as Harry kept his eyes trained on Louis’s as he did the same thing again with Louis’s boxers and licked his lips again before he moved his mouth to the head of Louis’s already hard and leaking cock.

It didn’t take long for Louis to become a mess of groans, moans, and ‘so fucking good’s, underneath Harry’s mouth. Harry ate it all up, keeping his eyes trained on the way Louis’s nose scrunched up and he sucked down on his lips. He loved that he was the cause of this.

When Louis finally came, Harry swallowed it all down and licked his lips with a cunning smirk. Louis shook his head and grabbed both of Harry’s cheeks in his hands as he sat down in his lap and brought their mouths together, licking the taste of himself off of Harry’s tongue.

“You’re amazing,” Louis smiled and buried his face in Harry’s shoulder.

“So are you,” Harry smiled and wrapped his arms around him.


	8. Chapter 8

“Afternoon, Romeo,” Perrie greeted Louis with a sickening smirk Monday afternoon as the boys from Calvary Creek and the girls from Canterbury Cross started to pour into Calvary Creek’s auditorium to begin working on the play.

“Hello, Perrie,” Louis deadpanned in response.

“Don’t look so happy to see me,” Perrie smiled at him.

“So sorry, love. I’ll try to hide me fond, eh?” Louis rolled his eyes.

“See to it,” Perrie cocked her head to the side with her smirk still on her lips before she winked and sauntered off.

 

“What do you think’s going on over there?” Zayn asked, Harry from where they were both hunched over painting a moon for the set.

“Perrie’s trying to weasel her way into Louis’s pants,” Harry laughed and shook his head.

“That’s not funny,” Zayn frowned.

“Why do you care so much?” Harry snorted, “It’s not like you two are – or were ever – together.”

“Yeah, thanks Haz. Got it,” Zayn grumbled.

“ ‘M just saying. You don’t seem all worried about who Liam’s talking to. Or Niall for that matter. Shouldn’t those be your top priorities?” Harry inquired.

“Don’t start that shit, Harry,” Zayn warned, pointing his brush at him.

“Ok, ok,” Harry put his hands up in surrender. “I was only saying-“

“Well don’t,” Zayn said. “Don’t say.”

“Fine then,” Harry replied. “You don’t ask and I won’t tell.”

Harry looked over Zayn’s shoulder and let out a little huff and shook his head. “But if you don’t mind my saying, if you’re in the mood to get all worked up over you ex-flings, you might want to keep an eye on those two,” Harry nodded his head towards a spot behind Zayn. He turned around to follow his gaze. Sure enough in the back corner of the auditorium, Niall had his hands in his pockets and his body close behind Perrie’s friend, Leigh-Anne.

 

“Hi,” Niall said quietly.

Leigh-Anne let out a little squeal and turned around quickly. “God, you scared me!” She said, clutching her chest and they both laughed.

“Sorry. Just wanted to say hello,” Niall said with a smirk.

“Well hi,” Leigh-Anne smiled and shook her head.

“I was wondering if you wanted to hang out again,” Niall offered, rubbing the back of his neck nervously.

Leigh-Anne’s smile widened as she opened her mouth to speak but then she closed it again. “I have rehearsals,” she replied.

“Yeah?” Niall asked.

“Yeah,” Leigh-Anne nodded. “‘m Lady Capulet.”

“How appropriate,” Niall let out a little laugh.

“And what is that supposed to mean?” Leigh-Anne inquired.

“Nothing,” Niall smirked. “Just that you like watching over Perrie is all.”

“Because that’s what friends are for,” Leigh-Anne smiled sardonically and cocked her head to the side.

“That’s not what my friends are for,” Niall smirked and licked his lips.

“Must be shit friends then,” Leigh-Anne replied.

“Fair enough. But they’re good in the sac so I put up with it,” Niall laughed.

“And how would you know?” Leigh-Anne asked.

“Because I’m in there with ‘em,” Niall whispered in her ear and chuckled at the blush that reddened her cheeks in response.

“Cheeky bastard,” Leigh-Anne rolled her eyes and let out a small laugh.

“Really though,” Niall smiled, “You should come ‘round after your rehearsal.”

Leigh-Anne gave him a slow once over with the tiniest of grins on her face and opened her mouth to speak when Perrie came over and wrapped an arm around Leigh-Anne’s shoulders.

“And what’s goin’ on over here?” Perrie smirked, eyeing over the two of them.

“Nothing, Pez,” Leigh-Anne said taking her eyes from Niall’s to Perrie’s.

“Well we must be goin’ then. We’ve got rehearsin to do, pet! Fancy a watch, yeah?” Perrie directed towards Niall.

“I’m ok,” Niall responded, his voice laced with annoyance. “Later then, Leigh-Anne?”

“Later?” Perrie echoed.

“We really should be going,” Leigh-Anne said to Perrie in a soft voice, keeping her gaze off of Niall.

“Later,” Perrie sing-songed as she turned them around and led Leigh-Anne towards the stage.

Niall was about to turn away and leave when Leigh-Anne turned back around and glanced at him over her shoulder. She didn’t say anything but she nodded. Niall grinned, giving her a thumbs up, and she gave him a shy smile in return.

 

Niall felt a thrilling rush later that night as he walked through the woods to meet up with Leigh Anne. The whole situation was strange and arbitrary but a nice breath of fresh air at the same time. After all of the drama he’d been forced to suffer through since Liam and Louis’s arrival, it felt good to have someone completely separate from that. Sure, Leigh-Anne had her own ties that Niall was completely sure of, but this thing – whatever it was – felt like a much-needed, pleasant escape from reality.

He walked until he saw a decent enough spot to stop at and sat on a rock to wait. Not much later, he was greeted by a hushed ‘hello’ in his ear that made him jump. He turned around to find that Leigh-Anne was standing behind him, hand over her stomach as she laughed and Niall pouted.

“Bloody hell,” Niall panted before he finally joined her in laughing.

“Gotcha back,” Leigh-Anne smirked as she sat down on the rock beside him.

“Yeah, yeah,” Niall let out a puff through his nose and bumped her shoulder. She bumped him back and smiled.

“So why’d you ask me to come ‘round to the woods? Are you going to chop me up with an axe and throw me in the lake?” She asked with a grin and they both laughed.

“I just like hanging out with you,” Niall admitted. “You’re fun.”

Leigh-Anne blushed and let out another smile and soft laugh. “So are you.”

“Well tell me about you. I want to know things about you,” Niall prompted her and she blushed. “What?”

Leigh-Anne shrugged and laughed lightly as she shook her head, “Is this some sort of date?”

“Do you want it to be?” Niall countered. They held each other’s gazes for a moment before Leigh-Anne smiled and they both couldn’t contain their laughs anymore.

“Forgive me if I’m a bit … off. I’ve never … dated a boy before. Not anyone really but-,” Leigh-Anne stammered and trailed off.

“Well I’ll forgive you if you forgive me. I haven’t been with a girl since I got to Calvary so I’m a bit ‘off’ as well,” Niall admitted with a shy smile that made Leigh-Anne mirror it.

“I don’t get it,” Leigh-Anne said quietly after a while.

“You don’t get what?” Niall asked.

“Why me? Why not Pez?” She asked and Niall frowned.

“Why _not_ you? You’re funny and smart. Not to mention gorgeous,” he told her.

“Does this have something to do with Zayn?” Leigh-Anne asked and it caught Niall off-guard.

“Why would this have anything to do with Zayn?” He responded.

“It’s just, Perrie’s gotten the vibe from your lot that you all don’t fancy her too much and the only reason we can think of is Zayn. Which if that’s why, he’s the one that stopped coming ‘round so-“

“What do Perrie and Zayn have to do with _this_ though?” Niall asked, motioning between the two of them.

Leigh-Anne let out a sigh. “Well Pez thinks Zayn’s put you up to this to-,” she started but Niall stopped her before she could finish the sentence.

“No,” he deadpanned. “My not liking Perrie has to do with Zayn, yes. But my liking you has nothing to do with her or him. My liking you has to do with you.”

“Do you?” Leigh-Anne asked.

“Do I what? Fancy you? Yeah, hell yeah,” Niall declared and Leigh-Anne laughed. “What’s so funny about that?”

“You don’t hold back, do you?” Leigh-Anne asked.

“No,” Niall shook his head. “I don’t.”

“Well I think you’re funny. And very sweet. You’re great to be around,” she told him.

“Thank you,” Niall nodded with a small smile.

“And if I wasn’t already involved with someone, I’d definitely be up for it,” Leigh-Anne said, both her and Niall’s smiles wavering.

“Who? Perrie?” He inquired.

“Yeah. Perrie,” Leigh-Anne replied.

“Ok?” Niall said, not understanding why it mattered.

“Ok,” Leigh-Anne echoed.

“So?” Niall questioned.

“So?” Leigh-Anne repeated.

“Why does it matter?” Niall asked.

“What do you mean?” Leigh-Anne asked in response.

“You’re seeing Perrie, ok. You can see other people too. She sure is,” Niall reminded her.

Leigh-Anne opened her mouth to respond but shook her head and shut it. “She’s different.”

“How so?” Niall scoffed.

“She – she’s been through stuff. She needs attention. ‘M not like that,” Leigh-Anne explained.

“Well we’ve all been through stuff. It’s why we’re all here, innit?” Niall replied.

“That’s true,” Leigh-Anne conceded hesitantly.

“Look, if you don’t like me, I get it. That’s fine. But if you’re only trying to shut this off because of what Perrie says, I think you should at least think about it,” Niall told her earnestly.

Niall watched as she took a deep breath and swallowed. And then she was leaning in to his space and her lips were on his. The kiss wasn’t long and it wasn’t steamy but Niall could still feel the sparks behind his eyelids and in his belly nonetheless.

“What was that?” Niall asked when they finally pulled apart.

“Dunno,” Leigh-Anne said as she leaned in and put her head on Niall’s shoulder.

“I’ll tell ya what it was. It was the beginning of a beautiful whatever this is,” Niall smiled and kissed the top of her hair.

“The beginning of a beautiful whatever this is,” Leigh-Anne echoed.

+++

“So where did you jet off to last night, Casa Nova?” Harry asked the next morning as he and Niall got dressed in their room before breakfast.

“Wouldn’t you like to know,” Niall snarked under his breath.

“I would, actually,” Harry said. “That’s why I’m asking.”

“Well where were _you_?” Niall questioned in response. “ _You_ weren’t here when I got back either.”

“Well I _was_ here until I figured that you probably weren’t coming back so I went to Lou’s,” Harry answered.

“Of course you did,” Niall rolled his eyes as he pulled his shirt over his head.

“Niall you weren’t even here,” Harry said. “So again; where were you?”

“Why does it matter?” Niall asked.

“God, why can’t you ever just answer questions? Why do you always have to turn it into an argument?” Harry huffed in frustration.

“I don’t have to tell you where I am or who I’m with, Harry. Last time I checked, you’re not my boyfriend and I’m not yours-,” Niall muttered angrily under his breath as he dug through his drawer for a pair of sweats.

“Niall, don’t start this-,” Harry sighed.

“Well if you really want to know I was in the woods with Leigh-Anne Pinnock! Perrie’s best friend! We made out and rolled around in the dirt and it felt GOOD!” Niall whipped around and yelled and all Harry could do was gape in response.

“You what?”

“And it was SO much better than anything I’ve had with you or Zayn in a really long fucking time,” Niall spat as he pulled on his joggers.

“So you know what? Thanks, Haz,” Niall continued as he spritzed some cologne on his wrists and looked at himself in the mirror, “Thanks for being shit. Because if it wasn’t for you, I never would have gotten back out there and realized that I could have been doing so much better this whole time.”

And with that declaration, Niall left, slamming the door behind him and leaving a crumbling Harry in his wake.

 

The first thing Louis heard when he woke up was a knocking at his door and muffled sniffles. He rubbed at his eyes groggily and was about to turn over to go back to sleep when he heard his name croaked out on the other side of the door.

“Haz?” Louis asked as he surged from the bed to the door in a matter of seconds. When he opened the door, he was met with a teary-eyed, sniffling, pink-faced Harry who had his head hung and his eyes covered by his balled up fists.

“Can I come in?” Harry asked and Louis immediately moved over to let him in.

“Haz, what’s wrong?” Louis asked as he pulled the duvet up for Harry to get into bed and opened his blinds to let some light into the room.

“Niall and I got into a really big fight,” Harry cried and Louis felt his own eyes welling up at seeing Harry so sad.

“He didn’t hit you, did he?” Louis asked immediately.

“No,” Harry croaked, “But I wish he would’ve. It probably would have been better than what he said.”

“Well what did he say?” Louis asked.

Harry shook his head and covered his eyes with his arm as Louis pulled him in closer, “He said I was shit, Lou. He made me feel so … so worthless.”

“Aw, Haz. I’m sorry,” Louis cooed, rubbing Harry’s hair from his face so that he could kiss his forehead.

“I love him so much, Louis,” Harry cried, rubbing his face into Louis’s arm. “How could he be so mean to me?”

“Harry, I’m so sorry,” Louis repeated. “I’m sure he didn’t mean it.”

“He’s been so awful lately, Louis. And I know it’s probably mine and Zayn’s faults but – God this is all just so fucked up,” Harry croaked. “Why does it have to be like this? Why can’t we all just be happy at the same freaking time and on the same freaking team? Like on his birthday? Why can’t things be like that now?”

Louis took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. “I think – I think you have to make a choice.”

“What?” Harry scoffed.

“I think the problem is this,” Louis motioned between the two of them. “Actually I don’t ‘think’. I _know_ that’s what the problem is. It has been since Liam and I got here.”

“What?” Harry repeated, shaking his head in confusion.

“Niall doesn’t like seeing you with me and if I’m going to be honest, I don’t fancy seeing you with him that much either. I thought that – I don’t know what I thought,” Louis shook his head. “But clearly Niall doesn’t like this which makes you unhappy which makes me unhappy so something has to be done.”

“Like what?” Harry asked, pulling away from Louis’s grasp.

“Haz, don’t get upset with me. I’m only trying to help,” Louis said, putting his hands up in defense.

“No, you’re not,” Harry frowned, “You’re just making up excuses to run again. God, Louis now is not the fucking time.”

“That’s not what I’m saying at all,” Louis argued.

“Yes it is. God, I’m such an idiot,” Harry scrubbed his hands down his faces as he jolted from Louis’s bed. “Look, if you didn’t want me, all you had to do was say so, Louis. You didn’t have to fucking string me along and make me fall for you knowing that there was never going to be a real chance there!”

“What the fuck are you talking about, Harry?” Louis looked at him in bewilderment.

“God, I’m over it! So fucking over it!” Harry raised his hands and shook his head before he stormed out of the room.

“What the fuck just happened?” Louis asked himself, scrubbing his hands down his face as he leaned back into his pillow.

 

“Well that’s odd,” Zayn said as he tucked his phone back into his jacket pocket and took a sip from his orange juice.

“What?” Liam asked, watching as Niall violently stabbed a pancake off of Zayn’s plate.

“I just got a text from Haz asking me to come to your room,” Zayn answered, peeling his eyes at Niall.

“What are you looking at me for?” Niall shrugged and stuffed a sausage into his mouth.

“What did you do?” Zayn inquired and Niall only shrugged again.

“Romeo’s not here either. Why don’t you send Baby Brother to go pester him about it?” Niall spat.

Zayn let out a hard sigh and rolled his eyes, “Niall we don’t have time for this. Class is in 30 minutes and we all have to spend the day around each other. Can it please not be miserable?”

“I’m sure as fuck not miserable,” Niall smiled and leaned back, putting his hands behind his head.

Zayn muttered a swear under his breath before he put a hand on Liam’s lap and leaned in. “Can you go get your brother? I’ll meet you in Global Studies.”

Liam frowned and shot Niall a glare. Zayn gave him a light squeeze and a peck on his cheek before Liam huffed and left the two of them at the table.

“Cute,” Niall snarked.

“You know I really miss when you were actually pleasant to be around,” Zayn frowned and Niall let out a little laugh.

“Probably because I was also sucking your cock back then too.”

“No,” Zayn corrected him, “I miss when you weren’t such a miserable twat all the time. Liam is nice and so is Louis and I know that if you actually _tried_ you could get along with them. You’ve bloody fucked Louis already! Yet you can barely stand to be at the same table as him anymore.”

“That’s not true,” Niall rolled his eyes.

“Yes it is.”

“No it’s not,” Niall said harshly.

“Fine, Niall. What part of it isn’t true?” Zayn crossed his arms.

“Fuck this, Zayn. I’m not doing this,” Niall said, starting to gather his things to leave.

“You’re not doing what?” Zayn asked.

“This!” Niall yelled, motioning between the two of them. “You know what I miss? When you and Harry weren’t so full of shit. When everything was fucking simple and the two of you didn’t sit around trying to psychoanalyze everything and pretend to be shit that you’re not! You’re not the boyfriend-type, Zayn. You don’t hold hands and go on dates and cuddle and kiss cheeks and all of that bullshit. And Harry isn’t a fucking cheater. Ever since Liam and Louis got here, you two have been acting so fucking different it makes me sick. And the worst part is that the two of you are trying to pin this on _me_. You two are saying that I’m the one that’s acting different and being a twat when you two are the ones that fucking changed!”

“No one changed here, Niall, except for you!” Zayn yelled back. The dining hall was starting to get quiet around them but neither of them was going to back down from this. All the pent up frustration inside of them that had been boiling for weeks was finally spilling and they weren’t stopping until it was all out.

“Bullshit! And you know, now that I think about it, this started way before Liam. This started with fucking Perrie! So you know what, maybe you’re right. Maybe you didn’t change. Maybe you’ve always been the same sack of shit but I’m only just now seeing it,” Niall spat.

“And maybe you’ve always been a manipulative, jealous asshole but it took Liam and Louis to show us who you really are,” Zayn shot back.

“Fuck you, Zayn!” Niall yelled, lunging at him.

A few boys rushed to hold the both of them back but Zayn tore his limbs away. “Get off of me! I said get off! He’s not gonna hit me and I’m not gonna hit him. Get off!”

Niall pushed the boys off of him and took one last pathetic glance at Zayn as he shook his head before he left the dining hall.

Zayn pushed his restrainers off of him and let out a hard sigh before he stormed out of the cafeteria and made his way to D-Hall.

“JESUS FUCK!” He yelled as he slammed Harry’s door behind him.

“What the fuck?” Harry mouthed at him silently.

Zayn shook his head as he slid down against the door and rested his head on his knees.

“Zayn?” Harry asked, leaning over in his bed to look at him. “Zayn?” he repeated when Zayn still hadn’t answered and again when he got out of his bed to sit beside Zayn against the wall. He gave him a soft pat on the back and rested his head on Zayn’s shoulder.

Zayn sniffed and wrapped an arm around Harry’s shoulder. “ ‘M not going to class,” Zayn muttered and bit down on his lip.

“Good cause I’m not either,” Harry let out a deep breath. “What happened with you?”

“Niall and I got into a screaming match in the dining hall,” Zayn shook his head and let out a hard sigh. “God, I feel so shit. Everything is so fucked up.”

“Niall and I got into a fight this morning too. And I got into a fight with Louis right after that. So I feel double shit. Liam’s not cross with you is he?” Harry asked.

“No. At least I hope not,” Zayn replied.

“Well can I sleep over at your’s tonight? Just so Niall and I can have some space at least for tonight,” Harry asked.

“Course,” Zayn agreed immediately. “Except you know we can’t like …”

“I know, Zayn,” Harry rolled his eyes. “I figured you probably sleep with Liam anyways so you guys have an extra bed.”

Zayn let out a little laugh and rolled his eyes, “And what would make you assume that? Liam is a gentleman and so am I.”

“Please,” Harry scoffed.

+++

“Lou?” Liam said gently as he knocked on Louis’s door before he went into his brother’s room. “Lou?”

“I’m up, Liam,” Louis grumbled into his pillow.

“Really? How could I not tell?” Liam said sarcastically as he sat down beside Louis on his bed.

“What do ya want?” Louis asked as he turned over to look at him.

“Zayn sent me to fetch you. Him and Niall needed to talk I guess,” Liam answered with a shrug.

“Talk,” Louis echoed in a monotone voice.

“Talk,” Liam repeated with a grimace. “You need to get up and get dressed so we can get to class.”

“Meh,” Louis grumbled as he rolled back over.

“Lou, you know you can’t skip class because of the play,” Liam reminded him.

“Ugh, I don’t wanna,” Louis whined as he rolled over onto his back. “Harry and I got into another fight this morning and I don’t feel like spending the day around him and Niall.”

“How did you two already get into a fight and you haven’t even gotten out of bed yet?” Liam asked.

“Because he and Niall got into a fight and then he came in here and we got into a fight,” Louis answered with a frustrated sigh.

“About what?” Liam asked.

“I don’t even know is the thing,” Louis rolled his eyes as he finally got up from his bed to start sifting through his clothes piles on the floor for something to wear. “I was just trying to tell him that I think it’s time for him to choose once and for all – like between me and Niall – and he got all mad and said that I was just making up excuses to ‘run away’ and all types of shit. Like what the hell does _that_ mean?” Louis scoffed as he sniffed a shirt and then pulled it on over his head.

Liam opened his mouth to say something but let out a sigh instead. They really didn’t have time to have that conversation right now. “Are you going to talk to him?” Liam asked instead.

“I don’t have time,” Louis said as he fussed with his hair in the mirror.

“Well not now, but like later,” Liam said.

Louis shrugged, “I don’t really have time later either. I have class all day and then rehearsal and homework.”

“First of all, you don’t do homework so I know that’s just an excuse. You can make time for him any other time when you two are getting along,” Liam told him.

Louis glared at Liam in the mirror before he turned around and crossed his arms. “Can we just go before we’re late?” He huffed.

Liam shrugged and followed him out of the room. His phone buzzed; it was a message from Zayn.

“Can you two not go 5 minutes without speaking?” Louis asked in annoyance.

“He says he’s not coming to class today and neither is Harry,” Liam informed him.

“Lucky,” Louis grumbled.

“Yeah but not for me. You need to fix this Louis,” Liam started and his phone buzzed again. “‘Oh and also is it alright if Haz stays in our room tonight. He’s fighting with your bro and Niall’,” he read out. “You need to fix this,” he hit Louis on the shoulder, “as long as you two are fighting, Zayn’s going to be spending all of his time with Harry and not with me.”

“Oh God, how horrible,” Louis said dramatically, scrubbing his hands down his face for added effect.

“I’m being serious, Louis,” Liam frowned. “Please just fix this. If not for Harry or for you, then for me.”

“This isn’t even my fault,” Louis said defensively. “Harry’s the one that got all flustered and upset with me! If anyone needs to fix this, it’s him.” Liam let out a hard sigh as they rounded the corner and went into Mr. Cohen’s room.

As expected, Harry and Zayn’s seats were empty but both brothers couldn’t help the pang of disappointment that their boys wouldn’t be around for the day. They also noticed that Niall’s seat was empty which was odd but they figured Zayn would probably be running interference between him and Harry for the day. Their mutual worry that the three were skipping class to have a makeup threesome went unspoken but they both harbored it throughout the day.

Niall did however show up to gym, much to Louis’s surprise. His eyes were low and he reeked of booze and smoke as he made his way into the locker room to dap up his friends and get changed. He also had a huge grin on his face that made Louis’s stomach sink.

“Niall? Where’ve you been all day?” Louis asked as Niall took off his shirt.

“What’s it to you?” Niall scoffed and shrugged.

“I was just asking,” Louis furrowed his brows, “Harry and Zayn have been gone all day too. Liam and I were worried and-,”

“Why?” Niall asked, cutting Louis off.

“Why what?” Louis replied.

“Why were you two bloody worried? We skipped class, big deal. We used to do it all the time before you two got here,” Niall informed him as he pulled his gym shirt over his head.

“Because Harry came to my room in pieces this morning saying you two got into a fight,” Louis said.

“Have fun putting him back together?” Niall sneered in reply.

Louis huffed and frowned.

“Well I haven’t seen him since this morning. I’ve been off minding my own business and I came to gym to blow off some steam. I’m sure if you’re so concerned about him, you know where to find him,” Niall looked Louis up and down and let out a puff of air before he walked away, brushing his shoulder into Louis’s roughly.

The game of the day was flag football and Louis and Niall ended up being the captains of opposing teams. Louis could tell by the way that Niall eyed him as they chose their teams that he would be in for it when the game started. Niall made it a point to stay on Louis at all times, whether it was offense or defense. Even though the game was supposed to be non-contact, Niall took every opportunity to nudge, elbow, and trip Louis that he could. But when Louis had gotten the ball and was making his way towards the goal and Niall tore his flag and shoved him to the ground, Louis had reached his limit.

“What the hell is your problem!” Louis yelled at Niall as he jumped to his feet and surged forward to shove Niall back.

“Fuck you, Tomlinson! You dropped the ball, get over it,” Niall yelled and shoved Louis back.

“You pushed me! You did it on fucking purpose, you prick!” Louis yelled.

“Not my fault you’re better at prancing around on stage than sports,” Niall scoffed. Louis’s eyes bulged. He shoved Niall down to the ground before he sat on top of him and got his hands around Niall’s neck.

“Fuck you, Niall! You wanna be mad at Harry, fine. But that has nothing to do with me!” Louis shouted as their classmates rushed over and pulled them apart.

“It has everything to do with you!” Niall screamed back at him from behind one of the boys.

“It’s not my fucking fault!” Louis yelled. “You’re the one that fucked things up between you two, not me! You can’t blame me that you make him miserable and practically drive him to me!”

“Screw you!” Niall shouted, lunging over one of the boys’ shoulders to reach for Louis but their coach stepped between them.

“Enough! Enough!” Coach Milligan shouted at the both of them. “You’re done, Tomlinson. Get out and go to Headmaster Grimshaw’s office!”

Louis glared at Niall before he shook his head and walked away.

Niall ripped himself from the boys that were holding him back and spat on the ground. “Show’s over! We have a game going!”

“No, Horan. You’re out too,” Coach Milligan said, hitching his thumb over his shoulder for Niall to take a seat.

 

“Back in my office so soon?” Headmaster Grimshaw snarked as Louis made his way into his office and took a seat. “Been attacked, have ya?” He joked at Louis’s dirt covered gym uniform and matted hair.

Louis glared at Grimshaw with no response.

“Tsk tsk tsk,” Nick shook his head as he got up from his chair and rounded the desk to lean on it in front of Louis. “This is not a good look, Mr. Tomlinson. You’re Romeo. You’re supposed to be the school’s golden boy. How do you think this is going to look to the sponsors?” Nick asked. Louis didn’t answer.

“You know, Mr. Tomlinson, I don’t think I’ve asked you for very much at all. Have a better attitude. Stay out of trouble. Don’t cause scenes. And I sure have given you many chances to clean up your act, but you have monumentally refuted every opportunity I’ve given you,” Nick continued.

“Honestly, I just don’t see any punishment that fits such a display of disrespect than to dethrone you as Romeo,” Nick said with a smirk.

“That’s not fair,” Louis argued. “That’s not right.”

“It’s more than fair, Mr. Tomlinson. The lead in this play should be a respectable young man that impresses the sponsors and lets them know that their money is going to a worthy cause. Frankly, not only have you not done these things since your arrival to Calvary Creek, but you have seemed to make a mockery of both yourself and this school’s very values and ethics. Mr. James may have been convinced that you were good enough of an actor to play Romeo but you are most definitely not fit for the role of a representative of this school.”

Louis shook his head and rubbed his hands down his face. Nick glanced at him in pity and rolled his eyes. “You are dismissed Mr. Tomlinson.”

 

Louis did his best to hold his tears in until he finally reached his room and slammed his door shut behind him. Once inside, he sank down against the door and sobbed into his knees until it felt like he could barely breathe. It was like every time he imagined that things at this school couldn’t get any worse for him, they did at an exponential rate. He’d lost Harry. He’d lost Romeo. And he was already aware that he’d been losing himself. He didn’t know how much longer he was going to be able to do this which is how he ended up on the phone with the last person he’d ever expected to call but the only person he knew could get him out of this shit situation.

“Mum?” Louis muttered into his phone, his face still buried in his knees.

“Louis,” His mother replied.

“Mum, can I please come back home? I’ll do anything you want; stop theatre, stop being with boys, whatever. I don’t care. Please just let me come back to Doncaster,” Louis cried into the phone.

“Oh, Louis,” His mother cooed and it was the softest her voice had been towards him since he’d driven away her homophobic second husband before she’d met Liam’s dad.

“Please, Mum. I hate it here. I don’t know how much longer I can take this before I break. I can’t do this anymore,” Louis pled.

“It can’t be that bad, sweetheart,” his mum replied.

“It is that bad, Mum,” Louis argued. “The Headmaster is a creep and he hates me for no reason. The only real friend I have here is Liam. I got the part of Romeo in the school play but I got into a fight today and the Headmaster kicked me out of the play.”

“You got into a fight today?” His mum asked.

“The other guy started it, Mum,” Louis said defensively. “He pushed me first so I pushed him back and- it was just a lot of yelling and shoving. No one punched anyone.”

“Oh, Louis,” His mum sighed on the other end of the line and he could imagine her shaking her head as she sat down at the kitchen table. “Geoff and I sent you and Liam off to keep you out of trouble. Why do you always have to go stirring the pot wherever you go?”

“This wasn’t my fault!” Louis argued. “The guy only hates me because his boyfriend is more into me than he’s into him.”

“Louis,” His mum said in disappointment. “God. Why can’t you just be-,”

“Be what?” Louis cut her off angrily.

“Why can’t you just stay out of trouble? Why can’t you ever just fall in line with everyone else and follow the rules?”

“I didn’t call for a lecture, Mum,” Louis hissed.

“Well then what did you call for?” His mum asked and he didn’t like the tone of her voice.

“You know what? You may think I’m a crap son but you shouldn’t have expected so much when I was born with such crap parents. Blame me all you want but this is more on you than anyone else,” Louis spat at her before he hung up his phone and tossed it across the room.

There was a banging on his door after what seemed like only a minute. He jumped up to find Liam standing in his doorway and moved for Liam to come in.

“What the hell happened today?” He asked hurriedly as he sat on Louis’s bed.

“What are you on about?” Louis replied.

“Did you and Niall get into a fight in Gym?” Liam asked.

“How do you know about that?” Louis asked.

“So it’s true, then?” Liam pressed.

“You answer my question first,” Louis ordered.

“People talk. I heard some guys talking about it in the hall after class and then I got a text from Zayn about it too. I came to make sure you were ok if it was true,” Liam explained.

“Well I’m not,” Louis said as he sank back down against the door. “I want to go home.”

“Oh, Lou,” Liam cooed as he got up from the bed and went to sit beside Louis on the floor. “It’ll get better.”

“No it won’t, Liam. I hate it here. And this place hates me just as much. Harry hates me. Niall hates me. Grimshaw hates me. He even took Romeo from me because of the fight. God, I can never have anything good,” Louis frowned and pounded his fist into the wall.

“Wait, what?” Liam asked. “What do you mean Grimshaw took Romeo away from you? He can’t do that, can he?

“God, Liam! I told you before, he can do whatever the fuck he wants! And he does!” Louis yelled, surging to his feet in anger.

“But that’s not his call though,” Liam urged. “It should be Director James’s.”

“It doesn’t matter,” Louis said as he started to pace. “Grimshaw said it himself that it doesn’t. James can think whatever he wants about me as an actor but if Grimshaw doesn’t think I’m fit to represent the school it doesn’t mean a bloody thing.”

“I’m so sorry, Louis,” Liam said, looking up at his brother in sorrow.

+++

“Where’s Niall?” Liam asked as he stormed into Harry’s room. He glared between Harry and Zayn at where they were laid up together in Harry’s bed watching something on Harry’s laptop.

“Hey, Li,” Zayn said sheepishly as Harry moved from laying on top of him to beside him.

“We don’t know. He hasn’t been here since this morning,” Harry answered.

“Well did you two know he got Louis kicked out of the play? I hope you’re all pleased with yourselves,” Liam spat at them.

“What does that have to do with us?” Zayn asked.

“It has to do with him,” Liam pointed at Harry.

“Me?” Harry asked in confusion.

“Yeah, you! The stupid fight was over you!” Liam yelled at him.

“Liam, calm down. That’s not Harry’s fault,” Zayn rationalized.

“That play was all he had,” Liam said. “He was so fucking happy to have something that was just his that you guys couldn’t mess with but amazingly enough you guys still found a freaking way. Congratulations,” he deadpanned, shaking his head as he left the room and slammed the door behind him.

“Oh my God,” Harry breathed into Zayn’s shoulder. “This really _is_ all my fault.”

“What, Harry? No it’s not,” Zayn insisted. “Niall and Louis not being able to control their tempers has nothing to do with you.”

“I have to do something,” Harry declared.

“What could you possibly do to fix this?” Zayn asked.

 

“Harry?” Nick asked as Harry knocked on his door and made his way into Nick’s office.

“Why did you kick Louis out of the play?” Harry asked immediately.

“Harry, you know I can’t share the disciplinary matters of other students with you,” Nick told him.

“Fine, don’t tell me. But what do I have to do for you to give it back to him?”

“Excuse me?” Nick asked.

“What do _I_ have to do for you to let Louis be Romeo again?” Harry asked. “I’ll do anything; I don’t care. He worked hard for this. He deserves it.”

“Harry this has nothing to do with you,” Nick told him.

“The fight that got him kicked out was about me,” Harry argued. “Look Headmaster Grimshaw, I know  that you don’t like Louis very much but please. This play means a lot to him and he means a lot to me. And I know him meaning a lot to me makes you hate him even more but you shouldn’t take it out on Louis. You should take it out on me. Be mad at me.”

“And how do you suppose that I should ‘take it out on you’?” Nick asked.

Harry bit down on his lips and cowered forward to kneel in front of Nick’s desk.

“I’m sorry,” he mumbled over Nick’s suitpants.

It was the first time Harry cried during a blowjob. At the time, he’d tried to convince himself that the tears were just a reflex to having Nick so far down his throat. But once he’d gotten up and wiped his chin, he couldn’t lie to himself anymore. The smirk on Nick’s face when he’d finished and told Harry he’d consider giving Romeo back to Louis made him sick and he couldn’t bear to be in Nick’s office for any longer after that.

+++

The next morning in Global Studies, Louis got a call to come to Headmaster Grimshaw’s office. Louis’s stomach sank and all of the boys watched carefully as he rose from his seat and left.

“Good morning, Mr. Tomlinson. Have a seat,” Nick greeted him as he came into the office and closed the door behind him.

“Why am I here?” Louis deadpanned.

“You’re here because Greg James has insisted that I reinstate you as Romeo,” Nick explained flatly.

“What?” Louis asked, his jaw slack.

“I told him that anyone else could play the part but he said that he’d already put so much work into the original cast and the balance felt ‘off’ without you,” Nick continued.

“So I’m back in?” Louis asked, a smile starting to creep on his face.

“Potentially,” Nick said and Louis’s stomach sank once again. “With a few conditions.”

“And what are they?” Louis asked hesitantly.

“First you keep your nose clean, and I mean it this time. One more referral to my office and not only are you out of this play, but you’re out of this school,” Nick warned him.

“Ok,” Louis nodded.

“Second, you stay away from Harry Styles.”

“Excuse me?” Louis asked.

“He’s as close to this school’s golden boy as we’re going to get and I don’t need anything tarnishing his reputation, especially not you. You stay far, far away from him.”

“But we’re friends,” Louis argued.

“Not anymore. Not if you want to keep Romeo,” Nick said.

“But-“

“And lastly,” Nick continued, cutting him off, “You are to begin a show of a relationship with your co-star, Ms. Edwards, for the sponsors.”

“What?” Louis screeched, “You can’t make me do that!”

“I’ve already decided that I will,” Nick deadpanned. “Should _you_ decide not to comply with these conditions, you will not only be dethroned of your positon as Romeo _again_ , but I will have you expelled for unchristian misconduct and homosexual fornication, things I’m sure your mother will be so proud to hear about.”

“You can’t do this,” Louis repeated in a small, weak voice.

“I can, Mr. Tomlinson. This is my school and I make the rules. I may not get to choose who gets parts in a silly theatre show but I do get to decide who stays and who goes and on what grounds. But this choice is up to you. You can follow my rules and have a smooth time here. Or you can continue to be a tyrant and live in misery until your expulsion. The ball is in your court.”

Louis shook his head, “What if I say no? What if being Romeo isn’t worth all of this to me?”

Nick glared at Louis and leaned forward in his chair, “Then you’d be letting a lot of people down, Louis. The entire school. Your castmates. Mr. James. Everyone that believed that you were actually worth something. Not to mention you’d be proving me right that you’re not worth the magnitude of representing this school.”

Louis swallowed and looked away, shaking his head. “Why are you doing this?” He asked, his voice barely above a whisper.

“Because it’s what you deserve,” Nick hissed in response.

Louis shrank in his seat under the weight of Nick’s words and averted his gaze. He was quiet for minutes until he finally looked at Headmaster Grimshaw again and spoke.

“Ok,” he muttered, barely audible.

“Ok what?” Nick asked.

“Ok, I’ll do it. I’ll do what you said,” Louis agreed, still not making eye contact with him.

"Good," Headmaster Grimshaw said with a grin that made Louis's stomach turn. "Oh and one last thing before you go; be aware that if you mention our little chat this morning to anyone - and I mean  _anyone -_ especially that brother of yours or Harry Styles, you'll be out of here faster than you can say 'Macbeth'. Know that I've got my eyes on you, Louis Tomlinson, and you're one more muck up away from being over before you even get a chance to start." And with that, Headmaster Grimshaw made a shooing motion dismissing Louis out of his office.

He left Headmaster Grimshaw’s office that morning feeling like he’d signed his soul over to the devil and in a way, he had.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gryles, and het, and beards, oh my! The drama is really heating up now so stay tuned!!!


	9. Chapter 9

“Got any plans after your rehearsal today?” Liam asked Louis as they sat alone at a table in the courtyard at lunch. “I was thinking we could play a game of footie or something. Get your mind off of things.”

“I’m hanging out with Perrie Edwards,” Louis said with a grimace.

Liam paused and furrowed his brows, “You’re what?”

“Yeah,” Louis looked away and bit down on his nail.

“Why on earth would you do that?” Liam gaped.

“She’s fit. And we should work on our chemistry,” Louis explained. He knew he should have did a better job at feigning excitement but there was no way he could be happy about this. He didn’t want to hang out with Perrie. He didn’t want to lie to Liam. He didn’t want to avoid Harry. This was all wrong.

“What about, Harry?” Liam asked.

“It’s over,” Louis deadpanned.

“It’s over?” Liam echoed.

“It’s over,” Louis repeated. “We’re done. I don’t have time for that drama anymore. I need something fresh.”

“And Zayn’s ex is what you consider ‘fresh’?” Liam inquired.

“Look I just think if we have to be a thing on stage, we might as well work on things behind the scenes too,” Louis shrugged.

“But you said yourself that she’s not even your type, Lou. What’s going on with you? What are you up to?” Liam pressed.

“I’m not ‘up to’ anything, Liam,” Louis said defensively. “And don’t you even think about telling Zayn,” he warned, pointing his finger at Liam.

“What, are _you_ not going to tell him first?” Liam asked seriously.

“I wasn’t planning on it,” Louis shrugged again and Liam sighed.

“Louis.”

“Look just don’t tell him, Liam. Promise me you won’t,” Louis urged him.

“Louis,” Liam whined again with a frown.

“Promise me you won’t tell him, Liam,” Louis hissed.

“But he’s my boyfriend,” Liam said.

“And I’m your brother. And she’s his ex. Barely. They hooked up a couple times, so what?” Louis took a bite of his sandwich.

“This just doesn’t seem right, Lou. He’s going to find out eventually and when he does, he’s going to be pissed that he didn’t hear it from you or me first,” Liam said worriedly.

“Well we’ll worry about that bridge when we get to it,” Louis said nonchalantly.

Liam sighed. “Ok,” he muttered under his breath, “but you owe me.”

Louis smirked. “Thanks little bro,” he said with a pat to Liam’s shoulder, “And if you’re still up for getting your arse kicked, we can definitely go for a round of footie tomorrow after classes.”

+++

“Perrie, hey! Perrie!” Louis called as he ran to catch up with Perrie and Leigh Anne that afternoon after rehearsals as the girls were starting back to Canterbury Cross. Though Louis never thought he’d be chasing after Perrie Edwards of all people, he knew it had to be done.

“Yeah?” Perrie asked as she turned around and looked at him with an interested smile.

Louis looked between her and Leigh Anne and their arms that were locked around each other. “Uh, I was-“ he looked down and shook his head.

“Go on then,” Perrie goaded.

“Yeah, go on,” Leigh Anne said with a little laugh.

“I just thought maybe we could go out for coffee or summat,” Louis suggested hesitantly.

“Who? You and me?” Perrie asked.

“Yeah,” Louis said flatly.

“Well someone’s had a change of heart since yesterday,” Perrie laughed and elbowed Leigh Anne. “Give us a second to confer, yeah?” Louis just stood, rubbing the back of his neck uncomfortably as he watched their exchange. They had a quick hushed conversation in front of him and then there was hugging and they were kissing each other’s cheeks.

“Ok. I’m in,” Perrie announced as she turned back to face Louis.

“Cheers,” Louis said with his best try at enthusiasm.

“When do you want to?” Perrie asked.

“I was hoping today, maybe?” Louis suggested. Perrie turned and looked at Leigh Anne who winked and Perrie turned back around.

“Works for me. Bye Petal, see you at home in a few,” she said to Leigh Anne, squeezing her hand and giving her another kiss on the cheek.

“Love you, Pezza. Have fun, but not too much,” Leigh Anne whispered as she gave Perrie a kiss on her ear and Perrie giggled as she pulled back to go to Louis.

“Well let’s have at it then, yeah?” Perrie said, clapping her hands together.

+++

 _‘hey u free?’_ Leigh Anne texted to Niall with a smirk as she watched Louis and Perrie walk through the auditorium doors. She knew that it’d be risky sneaking Niall into Canterbury in the middle of the day but with Perrie out with Louis, it meant she had an empty room so her and Niall could hang out again, this time indoors instead of rolling around in the woods.

A minute later he responded with _‘yeh what’s up?’_

_‘Pez is out on a hot date so my room is empty. wanna come over??’_

_‘Hmm let me think it over’_ Niall sent back. Leigh Anne rolled her eyes and sighed. Her phone buzzed again. _‘Will there be snacks?? *eye emoji*’_

 _‘BYOS!’_ she replied cheekily as she pushed through the auditorium doors to start walking back to Canterbury Cross.

 _‘Bring my own snacks?’_ Niall replied.

_‘yes’_

_‘*eye roll emoji* fine I’m in’_

_‘cool :)’_

_‘see you in 20?’_

_‘see you then!’_

Leigh Anne slid her phone into her pocket and let out a relieved sigh that was followed by a giddy lip bite and giggle. As soon as she got to her room, she hurried to straighten up both her and Perrie’s sides. Her side wasn’t that bad but Perrie’s was a right mess. Her clothes and underwear were everywhere and she’d just thrown down her books and bag when she’d finished with classes. Leigh Anne rolled her eyes as she begrudgingly straightened up her roommate’s side and then went to work on her own.

When that was done, she swiped on another few coats of mascara and lip gloss and primped her hair in the mirror. She pouted out her lips and bit down on them as she fiddled with her top and skirt and checked her bra and knickers to make sure they were suitable for the occasion. She shrugged, figuring they’d do. She didn’t really plan on going that far with Niall so soon but she figured it was best to be prepared just in case.

She heard her phone buzz and then read the text from Niall saying that he was outside. She couldn’t believe how nervous she felt as she walked to meet him at the front of the school but her nerves eased as soon as she saw him and he gave her a big hug.

“Hey,” Niall said into her ear before he backed up and grabbed a plastic bag from off of the bench he’d been sitting on. “BYOS!”

“You brought snacks,” Leigh Anne laughed.

“Yeah,” Niall chuckled. “I got you some too.”

“Thanks,” Leigh Anne smiled as she turned to lead him to her wing of the building.

“So you do this often?” Niall asked casually and Leigh Anne couldn’t decide whether she should laugh or scoff.

“I don’t,” she responded. “You’re the first.”

“So I’m special then?” Niall asked coyly. Leigh Anne rolled her eyes and stuck out her tongue at him.

“I just figured with Perrie out, I may as well use the room while I can,” she shrugged. She peeked her head inside the door that led into the building from the back patio to make sure the hall was clear before she opened it to let Niall inside.

“Well it beats rolling around in the rocks and dirt,” Niall said quietly, following her inside. “My back is still aching from the other night.”

“Oh poor baby,” Leigh Anne wiped her hands under her eyes at him and he proceeded to stick his tongue out at her.

“This is actually so cool,” Niall whispered as he trailed behind her down the hall.

“Let’s just hope that we don’t get caught,” Leigh Anne whispered back.

They made it into Leigh Anne’s room before anyone came out into the hall and she shut the door quickly behind him as soon as they were in.

“So this is your room,” Niall said, putting the bag of snacks down on one of the desks as he looked around the room.

“It’s not actually,” Leigh Anne said. “I just have a key to it.”

“Funny,” Niall stuck his tongue out at her again and they both laughed.

She sat on the bed and watched him as he walked around, looking at everything.

“It’s like you’ve never been in a girl’s room before,” Leigh Anne said in mock astonishment.

“Not since I’ve been at Calvary,” Niall admitted.

“Really?” Leigh Anne asked.

“Why do you sound so surprised?” Niall asked.

She shrugged, “I don’t know. I just figured you …”

“I’m not, Zayn,” Niall replied.

“Thank God,” Leigh Anne let out a little chuckle.

“You and Perrie have got a lot of pictures together,” Niall commented as he looked at the polaroids on their pin board.

“Yeah, we’re best friends,” she said.

“Who are these other two girls in the pictures?” Niall asked.

“The one with red hair is Jesy. The small one that’s probably got a bow round her head is Jade. They live down the hall,” Leigh Anne answered.

“Ooo I like this picture,” Niall said as he took one of the polaroids off the board.

“Which one is that?” Leigh Anne asked. Niall flipped it around to show her and they both laughed. It was a picture of her and Perrie with their arms on each other’s shoulders, touching tongues. “That could be you if you’d quit touring my room and get on with it.”

“Ooo ‘get on with it’,” Niall parroted as he sat down on her bed beside her. “Alright then.”

She smiled as she leaned in to kiss him and instantly her butterflies were back.

Niall put a hand around the back of her neck and the other on her cheek, while Leigh Anne fisted her hands in the cloth of his shirt. He opened her mouth up slowly with his tongue and she slid a hand underneath his shirt to rub her thumb over the skin of his stomach.

“Want me to just take it off?” Niall asked with a laugh before he pulled his shirt off. Leigh Anne looked at him with a mesmerized smile. “Do I look okay?”

“Yeah,” Leigh Anne smiled and kissed him again. She pushed him gently to lie back on the bed and straddled his hips.

Their tongues rolled around one another’s and they developed a comfortable rhythm. Niall ran his hand through Leigh Anne’s dark curls and Leigh Anne would tug gently on Niall’s blonde strands. When Niall would push his hips up slightly in response, Leigh Anne would roll her hips down against his. At one point, Niall turned his face away for a moment to catch his breath and Leigh Anne moved her mouth to start kissing at his neck.

“Oh God,” Niall moaned as he rut his hips underneath her. “Don’t tease me like that unless we’re gonna do more than just kiss.”

Leigh Anne smirked and gave him a soft bite to his neck before she sat up on top of him. “Do you want to?”

“Do more than just kiss?” Niall asked. She nodded. “Hell yeah.”

“But not all the way,” Leigh Anne clarified.

“How far?” Niall asked.

Leigh Anne smirked and unzipped Niall’s trousers. She slid a hand inside his boxers and they smirked at each other at the same time before they both laughed.

“I’ve never…” Leigh Anne trailed off. “Before. You’ll have to walk me through it.”

“Gladly,” Niall smiled and shimmied out of his pants and boxers. Leigh Anne’s eyes went straight to his cock and stayed for a second before she looked back up into his eyes nervously.

“It’s not gonna bite, I promise,” Niall assured her and they both laughed again.

Leigh Anne smiled before she put a hand around the nape of Niall’s neck and brought him back in for another kiss. As she grinded down on top of him, she slowly slid her skirt off from around her waist and slid Niall’s hand into her knickers.

As Niall started rubbing at her clit with his thumb, Leigh Anne turned her face and bit down on her lip. Niall took the opportunity to suck at her neck and Leigh Anne let out a heavy breath.

“Is this ok?” Niall mumbled into her neck.

“Yeah,” Leigh Anne breathed into his hair with her eyes scrunched closed.  She turned her face back to him again and rejoined their lips as she got a hand around Niall’s cock and started to stroke him off.

+++

The walk to the Starbucks wasn’t as awkward as Louis had braced himself for it to be. He found that Perrie was surprisingly easy to talk to so it didn’t feel as long, which was good. After they ordered, he let Perrie pick where they sat and she led them to the barstools by the window.

“Nobody needs a venti,” Perrie scoffed with a laugh at Louis after the barista had set down their food and drinks.

“ _I_ need a venti,” Louis asserted as he took a drink from his cup and grimaced. “I’m a busy man.”

“Too strong for you, Busy Man?” Perrie laughed as she popped a piece of her scone into her mouth.

“I actually don’t care for coffee that much,” Louis confessed and they both laughed.

“Then why’d you choose Starbucks?” Perrie asked.

Louis shrugged. “I don’t know. I figured it was a safe bet. I heard girls like it. Plus I needed some caffeine.”

“Because you’re so busy,” Perrie said sarcastically.

“Exactly,” Louis nodded and they both laughed again.

“So do you like Calvary so far? You must be new since I haven’t seen you around before,” Perrie said.

“It’s alright, I guess,” Louis shrugged. “Not what I expected, that’s for sure. But it’s ok.”

“What does that mean?” she asked.

Louis shrugged again, “It’s just different than what I thought it’d be. It’s not as strict as I thought, which I’m definitely not complaining about. Then there’s the whole all-boys thing which is strange because I’m used to coeds.”

“Yeah me too,” Perrie agreed. “It’s definitely a big adjustment, that’s for sure. But it’s not so bad, I guess. Calvary and Canterbury are right next door so we might not have classes together but you can still find coed extracurriculars if you’re up for it.” Louis looked up at her and let out a little laugh before he looked away again. “I’m just saying. And honestly being separated all day gets everyone that much more riled up.”

“So you like Canterbury Cross then?” Louis asked her.

“It’s alright,” Perrie shrugged and took a sip of her drink. “I didn’t really like girls very much when I first got here but when I got the stick out of me arse, I made some really good friends. You’ve met Leigh-Anne from the play. She’s my best friend there. We’re really close. Then there’s Jade and Jesy. We’re besties too but there’s just something different about Leigh. She’s like my person, you know?”

“Yeah,” Louis nodded in agreement, “Totally. I’ve made some pretty good friends at Calvary and it brought me and my step-brother a lot closer.”

“Yeah being at a Christian boarding school has a tendency to get you close with people you never expected. It’s crazy how it changes you,” Perrie shook her head.

“How’s it changed you?” Louis inquired.

Perrie shrugged and looked away, quirking her lip. “It just has. In lots of ways.” She was quiet for a moment and then she started talking again, “Like back home, I never would have been doing a play. I was a cheerleader.”

“I played football,” Louis told her.

“So you weren’t into theatre either?” Perrie asked.

“No, I was,” Louis corrected. “I did both. Might’ve been a bit unorthodox but I liked both. So I did both.” Perrie was the one to laugh and look away this time. “What?”

“Nothing,” Perrie smirked. “Just- that wouldn’t have gone over well where I’m from.”

“Why not?” Louis asked.

Perrie shook her head and rolled her eyes, “Guys at my school were just stupid. And small minded. They thought footie and theatre were both for queers.”

“What the hell kind of bloody idiots would think football is for queers?” Louis scoffed.

“Well we had a few players on the team that were actually gay so they just assumed that everyone else was gay too. Rugby was the big thing at my school,” Perrie explained.

“Well maybe you _are_ better off at Canterbury Cross then,” Louis shook his head. “That school sounds fucked.”

“It was,” Perrie rolled her eyes again and sighed. Things went quiet between them for a few moments after but then Perrie spoke again. “So can I ask you something?”

Louis’s breath stalled for a second but then he nodded, “Yeah. Sure.”

“Why did you ask me out?” She asked. Louis didn’t respond immediately which made Perrie nervous so she explained. “It’s just- I didn’t think you liked me. I didn’t get that vibe from you. And then all of a sudden you ask me to Starbucks.”

Louis took a breath and shrugged. “You seemed cool. And you are. I figured I should get to know you especially since we’re going to have to spend so much time with each other pretending we’re in love.” Perrie lowered her eyes skeptically. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Are you sure Zayn didn’t put you up to this?” She asked and Louis furrowed his brows.

“Why would Zayn set me up with you?” He asked.

“I don’t know,” Perrie said. “To humiliate me or something?”

“Why would he do that?” Louis asked. Perrie looked away and didn’t answer. “Well either way he didn’t put me up to this. No one-“ Louis looked away and swallowed because he knew it wasn’t true that someone hadn’t forced him into doing this. “I’m here because I like you, Perrie.”

“I like you too, Louis,” Perrie smiled and leaned in, looking up at Louis through her lashes.

Louis swallowed again and shut his eyes as he leaned in to kiss her. It wasn’t like kissing Harry at all. There were no sparks, no butterflies in his stomach. There was nothing. She was a good kisser, Louis had to give her that, but those feelings just weren’t there. Not for real anyways.

Thankfully the kiss didn’t last that long and Perrie looked satisfied when she pulled away from him.

“Well I had a good time with you today, Louis,” she said as she started to gather her things and stood up. “I have homework and stuff but I’ll see you around?”

“Tomorrow at rehearsal,” Louis tipped his head at her.

“Well see you then, Romeo,” she smiled with an endearing blush as she turned and walked to the door to leave.

Louis let out a deep sigh and rested his head in his hands for a minute. Things hadn’t gone as bad as he’d anticipated but something told him that this was still going to end in disaster.

+++

“Well this was nice,” Leigh Anne laughed as she buttoned up her shirt.

“Yeah,” Niall agreed with a laugh as he pulled on his pants.

“We should do this again sometime,” Leigh Anne suggested breezily.

“Definitely,” Niall smiled and leaned in to give her a kiss.

Leigh Anne smiled and gave him another kiss before she opened the door and poked her head out to make sure the hallway was clear. She took Niall’s hand behind her and led him to the back patio door.

“I like hanging out with you,” Niall commented with a squeeze to Leigh Anne’s hand as he walked behind her towards the front of the school.

“I like hanging out with you too,” Leigh Anne agreed and flashed him a small smile.

When they got to the front of the school, she gave him another kiss and a wave before Niall left to go back to Calvary Creek. She could just make out Perrie’s blonde hair coming down the gravel path a short distance away and decided to sit on the ledge of the welcoming sign to wait for her.

Leigh Anne could see her smile the closer she got and Perrie gave her a big hug as soon as she was within arm’s reach.

“Petal,” she cooed out, rubbing her hands up and down Leigh Anne’s back.

“Pezza,” Leigh Anne cooed back as they pulled away and started to walk inside. “How was your date?”

Perrie nodded and lolled her head, “It was … ok. Not really what I expected.”

“What happened?” Leigh Anne asked.

“We went for coffee. And talked,” Perrie explained.

“Anything else?” Leigh Anne inquired.

“We kissed. But only once. No tongue,” Perrie said.

“Was he a good kisser at least?” Leigh Anne asked.

“Yeah,” Perrie shrugged.

“So then what’s wrong?” Leigh Anne asked.

“I don’t know,” Perrie shook her head. “He was great to talk to, really sweet.”

“But?”

“But it didn’t feel like kissing Zayn. Or you. There just wasn’t a spark, you know?” Perrie said as she opened the door to their room. “Did you clean up in here?”

“Uh yeah,” Leigh Anne nodded. “Niall came over and-“

“How’d that go?” Perrie smirked and waggled her brows.

“He’s a good kisser,” Leigh Anne smiled.

“As good as me?” Perrie bit down on her lip as she looked at Leigh Anne’s and they both giggled.

“No one’s a good a kisser as you, Pezza,” Leigh Anne smiled and leaned in to give Perrie a kiss.

“That’s what I like to hear!” Perrie pumped a fist in the air and gave Leigh Anne a light smack on her bum. The door opened behind them and Jesy and Jade walked in.

“Girls!” Perrie said, going over to wrap an arm around each of them.

“Girls!” Jesy parroted. “Pretzels,” she smiled as she walked over and took a bag from the pile of snacks on Leigh Anne’s desk. ”Hungry today, were you?”

“Actually, Niall brought them over,” Leigh Anne said and all of the girls shared knowing smirks.

“Tell us the goss!” Jesy clapped her hands together as she sat down on Perrie’s bed.

“Dish!” Jade grinned as she sat down beside Jesy.

Leigh Anne blushed and hid her face in her hands. Perrie elbowed her with a grin. “We just fooled around a bit. That’s it.”

“Did clothes come off?” Jade asked.

“Yeah, did clothes come off?” Perrie inquired.

“Maybe!” Leigh Anne said. All of the girls gasped.

“Oh my god! Oh my god! Did you guys do it? Did you finally swipe your V-card?” Jesy pressed.

“No!” Leigh Anne replied quickly. “We did some stuff but not that. But anyways, let’s talk about Perrie’s hot date with Romeo instead.”

“You and Louis?” Jesy asked in astonishment.

Perrie rolled her eyes and let out a little breath, “Yeah. Don’t make a fuss, though. It wasn’t a ‘hot’ date. Not like Leigh’s.”

“Well what happened?” Jade asked.

“We went for Starbucks after rehearsals and talked,” Perrie shrugged.

“That’s it?” Jesy asked with a disappointed frown.

“Don’t sound so shocked,” Perrie pouted.

“Well it is kind of shocking,” Jesy said.  “Are you sure you like him?”

“Just because we didn’t jump each other’s bones the first time we hung out doesn’t mean we’re not interested in each other. We kissed!” Perrie said defensively.

“Well that sounds more like you,” Jesy smiled.

“Hey! Don’t make me out to be a slag,” Perrie frowned. It went quiet for a moment as the girls all looked around at each other and then burst out in laughter. “Fine but I’m not _that_ much of a slag!”

“Course not, Pet,” Leigh Anne smiled and wrapped an arm around Perrie’s waist.

+++

To Louis’s surprise (and dismay), Harry was waiting outside of his door when he got back.

Louis frowned, looking at him skeptically as he crossed his arms. “Here to bite me head off again?”

“No,” Harry looked down at his shoes. “I wanted to talk.”

Louis looked him up and down again before he rolled his eyes and unlocked the door. He went in first, threw his bag down, kicked off his shoes and hopped in bed then watched as Harry sheepishly followed him into the room and sat down in Louis’s desk chair. Louis raised his brows; Harry swallowed.

“I just- I wanted to say sorry for the other day. For blowing up on you like that. I was mad at Niall and I took it out on you and I’m sorry,” Harry said with a frown, his gaze drifting from his folded hands to Louis’s stare and back.

Nick’s words resonated in Louis’s mind and his stomach sank. _Stay away from Harry Styles. Stay far, far away._ He knew what it meant if he were to go against Nick’s warning and forgive Harry. He also knew what it would mean if he walked away from Harry, especially right now. He bit down on his lip and shook his head.

“Please say something,” Harry said anxiously.

Louis swallowed and looked down. “I- I can’t,” Louis started to stammer and Harry was already shaking his head. “I’m sorry.”

“Louis,” Harry whispered, biting down on his lip.

“I can’t do this anymore, Harry,” Louis choked out, his eyes set on his comforter instead of on Harry’s broken face.

“Please don’t do this, Louis,” Harry said quietly, fighting back tears.

“I’m sorry, Harry,” Louis shook his head. Neither of them spoke for what felt like an eternity but then Harry stood up, his head shaking and his hands buried in his pockets.

“So was I right then?” Harry asked, his sadness slowly turning into disappointment.

“Right about what?” Louis asked, his voice already starting to get wracked.

“About you knowing the whole time that I never had a real chance,” Harry said quietly, his voice shaking.

Louis bit down on his lip and looked down again.

Harry furrowed his brows and shook his head. “Forget it,” he said in a hushed, broken voice as he turned and walked out of Louis’s door.

Louis closed his eyes and rested his head in his palms. He tried to stop his lip from quivering by biting down on it but it was of no use. His tears were streaming and there was nothing he was going to be able to do to stop it until they were all out.

The entire situation was so fucked up and completely unfair. He’d just had to push away the one person he wanted to keep close the most and the worst part was that Harry couldn’t even know the real reason why.

+++

Niall was surprised to see the back of Zayn’s raven quiff and Harry’s chocolate curls when he walked into his room later that night. After he’d left Leigh Anne’s, he’d gone to hang around with Josh. They drank a little, smoked a little and played video games. Josh had offered to let Niall crash on his futon but Niall declined, saying that he wanted to sleep in his bed instead, even if it meant being in the same room with Harry.

“What’s this?” he asked as he walked in and shut the door.

Harry turned to look at him. He could see the tear stains on Harry’s reddened cheeks and the tears that still hadn’t fallen yet that wet his eyes. Zayn looked at Niall over Harry’s shoulder and shook his head.

“What’s going on?” Niall asked worriedly. Niall saw Harry shake his head at Zayn and then Zayn shook his head at Niall again. “Tell me.”

“No,” Harry croaked. “I don’t want to fight with you tonight, ok? I don’t have it in me. You win. I suck. I’m a piece of crap and no one wants me.”

“Harry,” Zayn said in a hushed voice.

Niall swallowed and blinked. “What- what are you talking about, Harry?”

“Louis broke up with me,” Harry said, his voice trembling and his lip quivering. “I know you’re probably happy to hear it but I’m miserable so don’t rub it in my face, Niall. Please. I can’t-“

“I’m sorry,” Niall said quietly, stopping Harry before he could go off on his warning tangent. Harry bit down on his lip and his eyes went from Niall to Zayn.

Niall let out a deep breath and walked to sit on the edge of Harry’s bed beside him and Zayn. He reached over to pat Harry’s leg and Harry buried his head in Zayn’s shoulder.

“I’m sorry that he did that to you,” Niall said quietly. “And I’m sorry for what I said to you.”

“I’m sorry we hurt you,” Harry responded quietly. Niall looked at Zayn and nodded his head subtlety towards the door. He nodded and rubbed up and down Harry’s back.

“Let me know if you need anything, ok Haz? A cuddle, a hand job if Liam’s ok with it,” Zayn joked and gave Harry a kiss on his head.

Harry let out a little laugh and shook his head, “Ok, Zayn.”

Zayn gave him a little smile and ruffled his hair before he waved and walked to the door, “Ni?”

Niall looked at Zayn confusedly. Zayn nodded his head outside. Niall looked at Harry and gave him another pat on his thigh before he walked outside with Zayn.

“Yeah?” Niall asked, sliding his hands into the pockets of his joggers.

“Just- go easy on him, ok? He’s really upset,” Zayn said quietly, peeking his head inside to look at Harry again.

“Yeah, no, I know,” Niall said.

“I know this has been rough on you. We’ve been rough on you and-,” Zayn shook his head and sighed, “but just- he needs someone to be there for him right now, not someone to kick him while he’s down.”

“I know that, Zayn,” Niall said defensively.

Zayn nodded and gave Niall a pat on his shoulder before he walked past him to go to his room.

Niall walked back into his room and shut the door softly behind him. Harry was curled around himself in his bed and Niall was surprised by how much the sight still broke him even after everything that had happened. He walked over to Harry’s bed slowly and sat on the edge of it again.

“Can we-” Harry croaked and sniffed softly, “Can we just be ok again?”

Niall nodded. “Yeah,” he breathed as he laid down behind Harry and wrapped an arm around his torso to hold Harry’s hand. “I’d like that.”

Harry rolled over and let out a soft sigh against the skin of Niall’s chest. Niall pulled him closer and rested his nose against Harry’s curls. “You’re not shit,” Niall said quietly and Harry looked up at him. “You’re not. You’re the best person I’ve met here. You’re not shit at all.”

Harry gave him a soft half-smile and wrapped his arm over Niall’s side to give him a little hug.

“I’ve missed you,” he mumbled into Niall’s shoulder.

“I missed you too,” Niall whispered and gave Harry a light kiss on his forehead. Harry looked up at him and rubbed his thumb along Niall’s jawline, bringing his chin down so that he could kiss Niall’s lips.

 Niall put one hand in Harry’s curls and rubbed his thumb along the line of the waistband on Harry’s boxers as he opened Harry’s mouth up with his tongue and Harry moved in even closer to him. As the kiss deepened, Harry slowly made his way to straddling Niall’s hips the way Leigh Anne had earlier. Niall looked up at him, at the sadness in his eyes. Harry nodded for Niall to go on. He reached over and fished a bottle of lube and a condom from Harry’s drawer and quickly slicked himself up.

“Should we… prep you first?” Niall asked, glancing down at Harry’s hips and trailing off.

Harry shook his head, “I want to feel it.”

“Are you sure?” Niall asked hesitantly. Harry nodded. “Well lie down at least,” Niall suggested as he switched positions with Harry so that he was lying down and Niall was hovering over his naked, vulnerable body. “Tell me if it hurts too much.”

“I will,” Harry nodded.

Niall let out a little sigh and grabbed his penis by the base and slowly slid himself into Harry. It had been a few weeks since the last time they’d been together but it didn’t take long for Niall to get into the rhythm that satisfied the both of them. He remembered to tug at Harry’s curls when he rolled his head back and to suck at his neck when Harry kissed his jaw. He remembered to push himself all the way when Harry asked for more. When Harry reached a hand out to rub at his swollen, leaking cock, Niall knew to bat his hand away and take care of it himself. He knew to let Harry lick his hand to get it a little wet before he lowered it to wrap around Harry’s cock and jerk him off until he was crying and mumbling Niall’s name and nonsense.

When Harry came and clenched himself tightly around Niall’s cock, he knew to warn Harry that he was close. Right before Niall came, he pulled Harry in for a deep kiss and felt the bite on his lip Harry gave him as Niall came and filled him up. They both took a chance to catch their breath as Niall slowly pulled out and took off the condom to toss in the waste bin.

When he lay back down, Harry curled around him again and gave him a kiss on his chest.

“Feel better?” Niall asked, rubbing his hand up and down Harry’s bare back.

“Yeah, I do,” Harry gave him a soft smile. Niall smiled back and gave him a light kiss before they both closed their eyes.


End file.
